During the pandemic, Anita worked for a local government office in South Tyrol in northern Italy. “I’m originally from Australia, but moved to Italy in 2010 for my husband’s job as a university professor,” she says. “We had been living with our children in a village called St Michael since 2019. I was working in the residency permits office, and when Covid hit I continued to go into my workplace because I had to see people in person,” she says.
From her office window, she noticed an elegant Italian gentleman who always wore a hat and carried a cane. “I remember he had these beautiful polished shoes too. I saw him all the time but never knew who he was.”
One day, in the spring of 2021, she was having a coffee in a local bar when she saw him again. “When the barista came to get my payment, I told her I would pay for the man’s coffee as well. As I was leaving, I heard her tell him the bill had been paid for by me.” Speaking in Italian, he asked her why. “I replied that he was just too elegant, and he roared with laughter.”
On her next trip to the cafe, he returned the favour. Anita discovered that his name was Gino, and that he had lived in the village for 20 years. “I used to have my own business selling fruit and vegetables but I was retired when we met,” he says. “I would go into the market square once a week. We had a lovely conversation and I liked her sincerity.”
The pair exchanged phone numbers and agreed to meet again for coffee. “There was something very special and immediate about the friendship between us,” says Anita. On their next meeting, Gino told her that he was widowed. “I liked that he was not afraid to show his vulnerability. He spoke about his wife in such loving terms. He also told me about his dogs. I liked his honesty and humanity.”
Next time the pair met, they went to a local photography show. “It was about the last 75 years of our village – she showed me the brochure and I was really interested,” says Gino, who was able to tell her all about the history of the area while they walked around the exhibition.
Their friendship continued to develop, and Anita began to visit Gino regularly at his home. “I know I can phone at any time and come over,” she says. “We share a love of singing, dancing and music.” When Gino was younger, his idol was Fred Astaire. “I used to copy his moves and people would joke that my feet never touched the ground,” he says. “I love sharing that with Anita – but now she’s the one doing the dancing.”
When Anita discovered that Gino was from Puglia in southern Italy, she made a special dinner to celebrate his “name day”. “In his region, children are given a saint’s name after their own. The saint’s day, known as ‘name day’, is a bigger celebration than birthdays for his generation,” she says. “I picked some zucchini flowers from my garden, stuffed them with feta cheese and bought pasta from his home region.”
Six months ago, Gino became unwell with Covid and was rushed into hospital, leaving Anita distraught. When she was able to visit him, she went in “dressed for carnival”, an event that was happening in the village at the time. “I wore fancy dress because I knew how much he’d laugh. I smuggled a bottle of cognac to the hospital and poured him some when the nurses weren’t looking.”
Despite his illness, Gino was over the moon to be visited by his friend. “When she walked into the room, I was so relieved to see her.” Now he’s back home, he has a live-in carer and support from his daughter. Though he goes to the square less often, Anita still comes to visit him for coffee.
Both describe their friendship as “extremely special”. “I love his dignity and humour. He makes me feel so good because he likes me just for me,” says Anita. “Even if he’s not feeling 100%, there is always joy in his voice.” Gino thinks their friendship is “perfect”. “There’s just a like-minded respect between the two of us. It’s exactly how friendships should be.”
