How to get oil from Canada's tar sands

First, buy several dozen 797B Caterpillar heavy hauler mining trucks. Each of these machines can carry up to 400 tonnes of sand, which can produce 200 barrels of oil Photograph: John Vidal /Guardian

Each tyre is 15ft high, costs $50,000 (£25,000) and weighs as much as five cars. The tyres last about 6,000-9,000 hours. In winter the temperatures can reach minus 40C and bits drop off the machines Photograph: John Vidal /Guardian

Get six Bucyrus 495HF mining shovels. These cost $20m each and stand seven storeys high. The waiting list is several years. They can dig out 100 tonnes of sand and oil with one shovelful. Four shovel loads fill one 797B truck. One shovel bucket weighs 85 tonnes. It takes a team of mechanics many months to assemble the machines which arrive on site in parts Photograph: John Vidal /Guardian

Cut down tens of thousands of trees on your plot and start digging. The sands with the most accessible oil are up to 300ft deep and cover roughly 3,000 km sq of northern Alberta. If you pick up a handful of the oil sand, your hand will be black. Oil makes up about 11%-15% of the composition. Watch out! You may slowly sink into the ground Photograph: John Vidal /Guardian

Every load of oil sand must be carted to a crusher and then washed with water from the Athabasca river. What remains is diluted bitumen, which is pumped to an “upgrader” with added air. There the bitumen is heated up and skimmed off and processed into lighter synthetic crude oils. Only then can it be sent to a conventional refinery Photograph: John Vidal /Guardian

Toxic waste water, or tailings, is sent to giant ponds where the heavy metals take up to 20 years to settle. These will cover lakes that are so large they can be seen from space. Don't think of the carbon emissions. Three times as much energy - and hence carbon dioxide emissions - is needed to produce oil from tar sands as from conventional sources Photograph: John Vidal /Guardian