After a guest tried to blast his staff as "deceitful", a hotel manager decided to take a stand, with a hilariously dry response worthy of a standing ovation.
After a stay at the otherwise highly rated Hotel Doolin, in the West Irish village of Doolin, the ticked-off customer took to Tripadvisor, where they claimed they were "snarled out" of the restaurant by a "bunch of grumpy ole men" who worked for the hotel.
According to this fuming reviewer, these supposedly moody employees were "overworked and despised one more traveller packing in the joint".
They then turned their ire to a receptionist named Emma, who they claimed lied to them, urging her to "stop the dishonest approach."
They wrote: "At first, she told me that her only availability was a double bed but we had three people (myself, husband, and son). So I asked if she could recommend another place in town and she told me that there was only B&B in town and no other hotels.
"We decided to make a few calls and then she said she could put us in a handicapped bathroom that has a double and a single bed. The price then jumped up considerably of course because we went to needing that single bed. The base price was 240 Euro per night."
The irate traveller claims they drove around for a bit after their "C+ meal" and say they found "so many more places to stay with vacancy".
Expressing their frustrations, they continued: "So Emma - stop the dishonest approach. Work with your customers and be truthful with them.
"There are so many other hotels right in the nearby area available and I bet has way better amenities [sic]. The WiFi is so bad it could not even load up small pics or videos ( you do not get what you paid for). Floors/carpet is filthy."
After reading the scathing review, general manager Dónal decided to stick up for his staff, and, after investigating what had gone on that night, expressed his disappointment that the review "was not an accurate reflection of what actually happened".
Dónal wrote: "From the title of your review, other readers would think that you inadvertently stumbled into Hitchcock's Jamaica Inn and that Hotel Doolin was full of brigands and cutthroats, that our staff wear eye patches and pantaloons and are hiding behind the pillars in the lobby, cutlass clenched between our teeth, waiting to jump out and pillage passerbys.
"You say the hotel is deceitful and dishonest and that one of our staff members, Emma, is a liar when, in fact, it is your good self that is being liberal with the truth."
Although Emma had indeed "made a genuine mistake" regarding the rate, Dónal says this was noticed the next morning by a senior receptionist, who rectified the situation before check-out.
The guests in question reportedly also received an apology and were even given a further reduction.
Highlighting how "unfair" it was to question Emma's honesty in such a public manner, Dónal continued: "Hey, sometimes people just need to vent.
"Sometimes at night when I come home from a long day's work at the hotel, I check to see if everyone is in bed and then I go out into the field at the back of my house and scream into the darkness. I let it all out, like a wolf on a moonlit mountain. I feel better after that and nobody gets hurt.
"I'm not saying howling into the night like a wolf will work for you, I don't know your circumstances, you may have neighbours that'll think it is weird, but there are other ways of channelling rage that don't have to involve Hotel Doolin and slandering Emma."
Witty Dónal then proposed the only "viable solution" to dealing with the "grumpy old men", deadpanning: "We've decided to execute all three of these men to ensure that no other guests will have to endure the horrific ordeal you went through that evening in the bar.
"Paul, Martin and Luis will be blindfolded and shot in the back of the head at Fitz's cross after mass this Sunday. There will be trad music, cocktail sausages and face-painting for the kids and I can organise a pair of complimentary tickets for you if you wish to attend.
"I know this will not make up for what happened to you but we hope it will go some way towards showing you that we take your feedback seriously."
In a comment given to the Mirror, Dónal explained: "Hospitality staff and my team here, in particular, are unsung heroes. Unless you work in hospitality people have no idea how hard it is.
"Everybody here is doing their absolute best and we care so much about our guest service but we are not perfect and sometimes we make mistakes and a bad review comes in and we have to take it on the chin.
"But this reviewer went too far, it was completely unfair and untrue, in particular, the way they called our receptionist a liar and this one time I could not let it go."
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