Being in a touring band is weird. For weeks on end, you and four of your mates are crammed into a bus where you all eat, sleep and piss. Shenanigans and batshit stories are bound to be born from such a scenario.
Few tour stories are as unhinged as the one of Lamb Of God and guitarist Willie Adler’s soiled jeans, however. The tale goes thusly: during the early days of the Virginia groove metal heavyweights, a drunken Adler gets up in the middle of the night and pees on vocalist Randy Blythe. A fight ensues, which bassist John Campbell and co-guitarist Mark Morton join in on, until Blythe throws Adler down, the guitarist passes out and tempers calm. Once Adler wakes up, it becomes apparent that he’s… voided himself in his jeans, and he reacts by legging it into nearby woodland to dispose of the soiled garments.
We know this anecdote because Blythe narrates it in a short film on the 2004 Lamb Of God DVD Terror And Hubris. The clip, entitled The Blair Shit Project and embedded for your enjoyment below, proceeds to show the vocalist returning to that fabled forest years later, presumably during the tour for 2003 album As The Palaces Burn. The spot has apparently become a hallowed one for the band, as Blythe admits he’s returned “three or four times” and always digs up the legendarily shat trousers.
The camera follows the singer among the trees and, sure enough, it doesn’t take long for the sullied pantaloons to be found once again. Blythe first notices one of Adler’s abandoned socks, which he notes as having gone through some “discolouration”. It is at this point everyone becomes grateful that the film is in black and white.
Moments later, the jeans are discovered – torn apart but still identifiable as clothing. “Here they are!” Blythe proudly declares as he holds them aloft with a long, thick stick. “Willie’s poopie pants!”
With perfect comedic timing, the vocalist then roars off-camera, “HEY WILLIE!” Adler’s response to being reunited with his former britches is, sadly, not seen.
20 years later, the ultimate fate of Willie Adler’s jeans remains unclear. One Youtube comment alleges that they were discovered by a fan and sold on Ebay as “Willie Adler jeans with DNA”. However, Metal Hammer’s meticulous research into the topic didn’t find any evidence of this.
If you have any information as to the whereabouts of this iconic item, we kindly ask that you keep it to yourself.
