With not a lot of time to go until Christmas, we thought we’d compile a list of our favourite festive jokes online.
It is the most wonderful time of the year, and festive humour never goes out of season.
Here are some of our favourite Christmas cracker jokes:
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Snowflakes
Why was Santa’s little helper feeling depressed?
He had low elf-esteem
What do Elves learn in school?
The Elf-abet
What do you call people who are scared of Santa?
Claustrophobic
What does Miley Cyrus have for her Christmas dinner?
Twerky
What does Father Christmas do when his elves misbehave?
He gives them the sack
Why are Christmas trees very bad at knitting?
Because they always drop their needles
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas?
A mince spy
And lastly, our absolute favourite: how the tradition of having angels on top of Christmas trees started.
Santa was very cross. It was Christmas Eve and nothing was going right. The elves were complaining about not getting paid overtime. The reindeer had been drinking all afternoon and the sleigh was broken.
Santa was furious. ‘I can’t believe it!’ he yells. ‘I’ve got to deliver millions of presents all over the world in just a few hours – all of my reindeer are drunk, the elves are on strike and I don’t even have a Christmas tree! I sent that stupid little angel to find one hours ago! What am I going to do?’
Just then, the little angel opens the front door and steps in from the snowy night, dragging a Christmas tree.
‘Oi fatty!’ she says. ‘Where d’you want me to stick this?’
