A mom-to-be has sparked a conversation about setting boundaries, as she shared 12 rules for when and after her baby is delivered.
On TikTok, Taylor Davis, @taylorhkdavis, frequently posts videos about how she’s preparing for her life as a first time mom, as her daughter is expected to arrive on 14 March.
In one clip shared last month, Davis shared her list of rules for when she is in labour and for her baby when she is born. While she said that this list was “a little extra,” she still thinks it’s important that people know what “her expectations” are and what she and her husband “are comfortable with.”
The first guideline is that if she tells some that she’s in labour, they cannot “announce the baby’s arrival” until Davis has posted about it on social media herself.
“Also, please do not inform other people unless asked, as we [do not want to] be bombarded with text,” Davis wrote in her list.
The second rule is that when in labour, they will be “sending updates that they’re comfortable with and on their schedule,” so Davis and her husband can focus on the birth.
The following guideline detailed how no one can “post pictures” of their baby until the parents do or without permission. From there, the next two guidelines stated that Davis will not be having visitors at the hospital. They won’t have any at visitors at their home until they’re ready.
“If you disagree with the choice, medical or otherwise, that we’re making for our daughter or for me, we don’t want to hear about it,” Davis explained. “I’m already getting messages saying ‘why would you do that?’...and we just don’t want that from our friends and family.”
The next two guidelines states that “kissing” their baby is not allowed, and depending on COVID, masks are “required.” Unvaccinated people also cannot be around Davis’ baby.
In the ninth rule, Davis noted that people can’t ask to hold their baby and her parents “will offer when [they] feel comfortable,” as she’s a “new mom” and isn’t sure how she’ll feel. If someone is holding the baby and she starts crying, she has to be “immediately handed back” to her mother or father.
Another rule is that if Davis and her child are in the nursery with the door closed, “do not enter or knock for any reason.”
“I just want us to have that privacy,” Davis added.
In the final guideline, the new-mom said that if someone feels sick “in any way” on the day they plan on visiting, “please reschedule.”
“We promise to make sure you get to see her, but her health is [a] priority,” the list concluded.
As of 3 March, the video has over 673,200 views, and has sparked some mixed responses in the comments. For example, many viewers praised Davis for setting her rules in place.
“SO PROUD OF YOU!” one wrote. “As a mom to 3 I support this 100000 [per cent]! Set the boundaries now. Get it little mama!”
“As a mom of a pandemic baby, thanks for normalising boundaries to keep these babies safe,” another added. “You’re already killing it, mama!!”
On the opposite side of the coin, some TikTok users claimed that Davis was being too strict with her list.
“This is the baby version of a bridezilla,” one said. “You should be happy you have people that love and care for you!”
“I am sorry, but I am so sick of these over the top rules. I feel like it comes from an inflated ego,” another wrote.
However, in response to all the negative comments, many viewers chimed in and noted how none of Davis’ requests were unrealistic.
“Literally none of this is unreasonable, 36 weeks with my second,” a comment reads. “Anyone who thinks any of this is unreasonable has entitlement issues. It’s HER birth.”
“These comments do NOT pass the vibe check,” one TikTok user explained. “As someone who is pregnant and our families are EXTREMELY overbearing, guidelines will be a requirement for us.”
The Independent has reached out to Davis for comment.
