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Daily Mirror
Daily Mirror
Danni Scott

Expert warns against 'hobby' question on first date and shares what to ask instead

First dates are one of the most nerve-wracking things to do as a single person trying to find love. Questions of 'will they like me?', 'will we get on?', and 'will it be awkward?' flood your mind as you walk to the restaurant.

Getting to know someone is all about asking the right questions without interrogating your date, but this can be harder than it sounds as we get swept up in conversation and forget to find out important answers about our compatibility.

Dating expert Pippa Murphy has shared her top questions to ask that could help turn that first date into a successful relationship.

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Successful dates boost our self esteem, especially if we're nervous beforehand (stock image) (Getty Images)

Most single people use dating apps to find potential partners, meaning the first date is "all about getting to know each other and having fun", according to Pippa, the sex & relationship expert at condoms.uk.

Start by simply asking your date about their day, Pippa explained: "This is a great way to get a conversation going. It's also a good way to let your date know that you're interested in them and their life.

"If they have a terrible day, they'll appreciate the fact that you care enough to ask about it. And if they had an amazing day, they'll love talking about it with someone who's actually listening."

Breaking the ice is the most important thing and Pippa suggests asking about the "best thing that happened" to them this week. This is a great follow up if their day wasn't particularly interesting, to keep the conversation flowing.

She explained: "The broadness of the question allows the person to gauge what they perceive as the 'best'. It shows if they appreciate the smaller things in life or events on a bigger scale.

"Plus, talking about what's happening in your life currently is a good way to get to know someone, as often people only talk about their most impressive, core memories as a means of flattering."

Asking about hobbies is often a go-to date question but Pippa thinks this can be "a dead-end". She said: "Instead you should ask them how they like to relax as this will provide a better insight into their characteristics.

Asking the right questions could help you work out if your date is the one for you (Getty Images/iStockphoto)

"If their downtime involves relaxing with a book, you will be able to understand if they are happy in their own company. On the other hand, if they mention friends or family in their relaxing activities, they might prefer socialising with people.

"Showing an interest in idle time will open further conversations to find a mutual interest."

Many of us spend our down time watching the latest hit shows so this can lead on to further questions about their tv habits. Pippa added: "Asking about their most recent or interesting watch will provide you with an understanding of their genre preference and their reasoning behind it.

"People tend to relate to characters they aspire to be like. You can exchange show recommendations and you could find you have more in common than you think, especially if you dig deep into plot twists and start to discuss how characters coped in certain situations."

These easy questions will set you up well to ask more in depth things such as finding out something your date wants to learn. Pippa says this can immediately rule out anyone unwilling to learn and grow, which "can be a turn off".

She added: "It allows you to see if their interests match with yours alongside their current priorities. And hey, if the date goes well, your second date could be learning something you’re both interested in, together."

Asking about what your date hopes to learn could lead on to this next top question if they say cooking as Pippa advising finding out what their signature dish is. This shows you if they're an avid cook or a takeaway fan as well as opening up discussions of food allergies or preferences.

This question could also "kickstart another conversation about the best restaurants in your local area" if they're a fan of dining out, which could lead to planning a second date.

Pippa advises avoiding topics like politics, exes, marriage or bad experiences, even if your week was a bit rubbish as these can make you seem negative or bring up red flags for your potential partner.

If nerves are running riot, she suggests taking a deep breath, not drinking too much and focusing on the positives, adding: "Don't worry so much about planning the perfect evening — just enjoy spending time with each other.""

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