Erin McGregor has told how she lives in hope her son will one day say “mammy”.
The devoted mum-of-two heartbreakingly admitted every little thing he achieves “feels like we win the lotto”.
Erin, sister of MMA superstar Conor, said she doesn’t know if six-year-old Harry will ever speak but she would “give anything” to hear him utter his first words.
Read More: Conor McGregor's sister Erin shares emotional message as she praises autism support groups
Harry has autism and is non-verbal with sensory issues.
Opening up on her heartache, Erin told the Irish Sunday Mirror: “We have a lot of therapies, occupational, speech and mobility.
“We already knew he had a global development delay at age two.
“I knew nothing about autism, I was clueless, I had to find a new way of living and being a mother to Harry.”
Dubliner Erin, 41, said: “He doesn’t use a knife or a fork.
“Other people would take for granted simple stuff.
“I remember seeing a family with a young child and they were telling him to watch for the car.
“I got so upset.
“I recall thinking Harry doesn’t have the awareness, we live on high alert.
“The best way to describe the early years is that you are constantly watching your child.
“I never want to sound like I’m moaning, but having a child with additional needs brings certain difficulties.
“It puts so much into perspective.
“When I raised Taylor, who’s 22 now, you hope one day she’ll have a house, a job, all the normal things.
“But I worry what happens when myself and Terry are no longer here for Harry?
“My job is to get Harry to function in daily life.
“He wouldn’t function the way a six-year-old would, he needs extreme one-to-one care all the time.”
Devoted mum Erin revealed she was reticent to talk about Harry’s struggles after being targeted by cruel trolls.
She added: “You wouldn’t believe this, but mean things are sometimes written under posts where I’d be expressing my pain as a mother and my worries in a society who really aren’t equipped for him.
“I might express things on social media and people say, ‘What would she know?’
“Even if I had a nanny that’s not going to stop the sensation of the sand or the noise of the sea.
“It doesn’t stop the meltdowns even if I did have help.
“I cry and think I just want to be his mam because I idolise him.
“Lots of people assume things about me. Finance, of course, helps but I’m not from wealth.
“I’m a working class girl, I find it difficult to accept help. I do need some help as I run a business.
“But I just want to be a mam, I want to do everything for Harry myself which is probably my own downfall.”
Reflecting on how Harry has grown so much in the past two years, Erin said: “He communicates on such a deep level.
“Children with autism are so kind and sensitive and the most wonderful children you could ever meet.
“He has an amazing way to connect when I delve into his world and figure out what he likes and what he’s interested in.
“I was told early on when we were filling in all sorts of charts on his abilities to focus on what he can do and not on what he can’t do. Every little thing he can do feels like we win the lotto with him every single day.”
Opening up on her darkest hour, she added: “I was really scared as I didn’t understand autism.
“I was so scared of the future – I still don’t know if he’ll ever talk but I live in hope. I’ve gotten stronger in time, he’s shown me all the great things he’s capable of.”
Erin admitted caring for Harry has at times put a strain on the relationship with her husband Terry.
She said: “At one point you both feel like you’re sad and lonely in the sadness, you’re worried and anxious.
“You feel guilty for having them. It’s because you love your child so much that you have them in the first place.
“You want this world to be perfect for them, no bad things to happen.
“You know your child might come up against things that you cannot fix for them as a parent.
“Luckily for me and Terry we pulled together and found each other in that. When I feel nobody understands, Terry will say, ‘I do Erin’.
“When Harry turned five, Terry said, ‘I’ve been a dad for five years and I’ve never heard the word daddy’.
“I got upset for Terry because I know how that feels as I’ve never heard him say mammy.
“I remember crying thinking, ‘Do you think he knows I love him?’ He shows me in ways that are so much more fulfilling than even verbal, that’s the gift he’s given me.
“He has given me patience to figure out a way to hear love that isn’t in words.”
Meanwhile, Erin is in rehearsals and set to star opposite Ryan Andrews and MacClean Burke in the Olympia’s Christmas panto Olly, Polly & The Beanstalk for her fourth year in a row.
And she said she can’t wait for Harry to see his mammy on stage. She said: “It was on screen for the past two years.
“I hope he will enjoy it, even if he only gets a little bit of it, he will know I’m in the panto.
“I’m part of a duo called Tik Tok, I have to dance, sing and act. I don’t know if I’m very good at it but I’m so glad they’re asking me back.
“Dancing With The Stars opened up everything for me.”
- Olly, Polly & The Beanstalk runs from December 21 to January 8 at the 3Olympia Theatre, Dublin
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