Kids say the craziest things, but sometimes it’s the parents who drop the biggest bombs. One dad took to the internet to ask if he is a jerk for getting real with his wife about why their kids prefer him over her, and it’s causing quite the debate.
Our dad got super honest with his wife after she complained that their kids like him more than they like her. And let us tell you, this truth stings more than a bee on a spring day.
More info: Reddit
Wife complains to her husband about the kids preferring him over her, saying they like him better
Image credits: RDNE Stock project (not the actual photo)
Dad tells his wife the blunt truth about why the kids prefer him, saying he spends more time with them
Image credits: alexandertheking
Image credits: Elina Fairytale (not the actual photo)
Image credits: alexandertheking
Image credits: Pavel Danilyuk (not the actual photo)
Image credits: alexandertheking
Dad loves spending time with his young kids, even if it means waking up at 5:30am every day, while the wife sleeps in
The dad’s wife had been feeling pretty down because their kids always run to him instead of her. They wake up at the crack of dawn and guess who’s there with them? Dad. He’s up every morning with the kids between 5:30 and 6:00 AM. Mom? She rolls out of bed at 7:30 on weekdays and enjoys her beauty sleep until 9:00 on weekends. That’s a solid 13 hours more a week that dad is spending with the little ones.
Bedtime? That’s all dad too. Baths, stories, the whole shebang. It adds up to about 7 hours a week. And whenever mom’s feeling stressed and needs some “me” time, dad takes the kids out for some fun. He’s the one handling all the extracurricular activities and playdates too. In short, he’s spending a lot more time with the kids than she is.
Now, dad didn’t drop this truth bomb in a whiny or bitter way. He genuinely enjoys spending time with his kids. But he pointed out that it’s no wonder they’re more attached to him when he’s the one who’s always there. He feels it’s a bit unfair for his wife to complain when she’s not putting in as much time.
Research indicates that young children create “attachment hierarchies”, prioritizing some relationships above others. This hierarchy is not about who the child loves the most, but rather who they are most comfortable and familiar with. As young kids rely on adults for survival, they create these “attachment hierarchies” to help them keep track of the most important figures in their lives.
Image credits: Kampus Production (not the actual photo)
Our couple runs a business together, working the same hours, so it’s not like mom is swamped with work more than dad. But even after their chat, it seems like nothing changed. The following morning, their 18-month-old woke up at 5:30 AM and mom was still snoozing away at 7:30 AM.
Let’s get real: parenting is definitely a tough job and everyone needs a break every now and then. But it’s important for both parents to be involved in their kids’ lives, as much as they can. Experts explain how young kids benefit from having strong relationships with both mom and dad. It helps with their emotional development and provides a balanced upbringing. “Having both parents actively present in their lives fosters a sense of stability and security. Children thrive in environments where they feel safe and loved. The consistent presence of both parents offers emotional stability and reassurance, reinforcing the idea that their families value and cherish them.”
Having both parents actively participating in their kids’ lives also helps them build a stronger sense of self-esteem. “When they receive love, attention and affirmation from both parents, they internalize the message that they are important and of value. This positive self-perception can have long-lasting effects, influencing their confidence and resilience as they grow into adulthood,” the article explains.
In the end, it’s all about balance. Parenting is like a team sport, where everyone needs to be actively participating. It’s wonderful that this dad enjoys spending time with the kids, but maybe they could find a way to involve mom more as well. This way, the kids can benefit from both parents’ involvement, and mom can feel more connected to the family dynamic.
Now, onto the big question: is dad in the wrong for speaking his mind? Many folks in the comments don’t seem to think so. They admire his honesty and his commitment to being an engaged parent. What’s your take on it? Do you think Dad was too straightforward, or was it a necessary reality check? Share your thoughts with us in the comments!
People in the comments side with our dad, saying that his wife should spend quality time with the kids, or they will miss out on forming a special bond with their mom
