JOG ON, BONITO
The year is 2002. It’s only 9am but you’ve already sunk two pints of industrial-strength lager. In his BBC commentary, John Motson has mentioned cornflakes at least three times. Ronaldinho is standing over a free-kick, with England and Brazil locked at 1-1 in their World Cup quarter-final, soon after Rivaldo’s clinical equaliser. This will be no trouble for the commanding figure of David Seaman in goal, right? Wrong. The seemingly innocuous ball arcs up from Ronaldinho’s boot, over the head of the statuesque Seaman, and nestles in the far corner of the net. Cafu, Ronaldo and Ronaldinho prance with delight by the corner flag. The history of England’s attempts to beat Brazil at football is thus summed up in a few bizarre seconds.
Ronaldinho is soon to be sent off for a studs-up tackle on Danny Mills but the die is cast. England’s deep absence of belief when it comes to taking on the world’s most famous footballing nation is exposed yet again. Of course, there have been occasional flashes of brilliance: John Barnes’ dribble at the Maracanã in 1984 springs to mind, along with Graeme Le Saux’s belting half-volley back in 1995. There have been iconic moments too, most famously Bobby Moore and Pelé shaking hands, tops off and smiling, as they exchange shirts in 1970. But overall England’s tale of the tape against Brazil is undistinguished: four wins from 26, with 11 draws and 11 defeats. Brazil have won three out of four World Cup meetings (1962, 1970 and 2002) with a goalless draw in 1958.
With Euro 2024 in sight, Gareth Southgate’s team have an opportunity to make it five out of 27, but the weight of history has never meant much to these players. We’re talking about a team that won a penalty shootout at a World Cup, never mind that they also beat Germany in an actual knockout tie. One relevant piece of history is that Joe Gomez – back with England for the first time since 2020 – was man of the match on his second appearance for his country in the most recent meeting with Brazil, a goalless November 2017 draw at Wembley.
Back in 2013, Le Saux remembered that famous hit under Terry Venables at Wembley. England went on to lose 3-1. His overriding memory? “The kit was awful.” Don’t mention kits, Graeme, please …
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QUOTE OF THE DAY
“We’re Saturday, Tuesday, Friday, Monday, Thursday, Saturday, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday, Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday – oh, and we have to fit into there somewhere the abandoned Eastbourne game from Tuesday night” – Truro City boss Craig David Paul Wotton lays out the fixture chaos awaiting his National League South side, who have to wedge 13 matches into 28 days as the season draws to a close.
FOOTBALL DAILY LETTERS
Social media disgrace talk of England’s new football shirt being ‘woke’ (yesterday’s Football Daily), which is so depressing that it almost makes me long for the annual ‘why isn’t James Maclean wearing a poppy’ debate, reminds me of the guy who said he tried watching The Sopranos but the first word he heard was ‘woke’, so he turned it off immediately” – Noble Francis.
Typical of total left-wing, woke cobblers, your ‘article’ illustrates how out of touch you are regarding the patriotic, yes patriotic sentiment surrounding the cherished St George’s flag. If you need this to be ‘explained’ you are dimmer than I thought. If your paper was free, I would only use it to wipe my bottom. Have a nice day” – Laurie Turner.
If Nike really wanted to boil some blood, they should have put the European Union flag on the collar. Da Iawn Cymru, by the way” – Anthony Salisbury.
Am I the only one who thinks the statue of Harry Kane (yesterday’s Football Daily) looks more like Martin Fry, front man of 1980s popsters ABC? Appropriate really, as it looks like it’s made of chocolate” – Richard Morganstern (and no others).
If they can’t find a place for Kane’s statue in north London, I’m sure a spot outside Carrow Road could be found. It would be quite appropriate after his loan spell in the fine city was spent mostly on the bench. The addition of a banjo as he stares wistfully into the distance for a cow’s backside would complete the picture of his time there” – David Branch.
Send letters to the.boss@theguardian.com. Today’s winner of our letter o’ the day is … David Branch, who gets the last copy of Too Good to be Forgotten, published by Pitch Publishing. Visit their book store here.
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