Leah Bracknell 's widower Jez Hughes has written about his experience with grief in a tribute to the late Emmerdale star to mark the third anniversary of her death.
The actor - who played Zoe Tate on the ITV soap from 1989 to 2005 - passed away aged 55 on September 15, 2019, three years after being diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer.
Her widower Jez, 48 - whom she had married in 2017 - paid tribute to the mother-of-two ahead of the anniversary of her death this year, in a post on social media yesterday.
He reflected on his late wife and his experience with grief alongside a throwback photo of the couple which he said brought back "good [but also] painful memories".
The shamanic healer wrote last night: "Three years tomorrow. I'll be in the woods teaching and holding a sweat which seems fitting. I found this old, blurred photo from way back when and it brought back good, if painful memories.
"Grief is like an eagle, it soars so high and close to the sun you thinks it’s gone, then suddenly it’s down upon you, talons tearing you to shreds til you’re bloody and bruised all over again, raw flesh exposed to the wind."
He continued by saying that "grief is the price for love" and there are "no discounts on offer," with him adding that the experience is "as non negotiable as death itself".
Jez continued: "Time changes everything, yet nothing at the same time, for grief knows no time, it operates to its own inner workings, dances to its own mysterious tune."
Leah's widower further commented in the recent social media post that grief is both "awe inspiring and awful" as well "sensitising the already over sensitised".
He added: "Yet, despite all this, I pay the ferryman, the gatekeeper of all love and all loss, and will pay over and over again through this, and many lifetimes."
"Grudgingly and gratefully all at once. For it is always a price worth paying, as the rain turns again to sunshine and the world is renewed," he continued about grief.
Writing about his late wife, who was born Alison Bracknell, he concluded by writing: "Ali, you died on the same full moon as the queen, which I know will make you smile.
"That Piscean ocean transitioning you to another world where I know, deep in my heart, you are soaring and tearing up another adventure anew. And this makes my heart sing, a balm to all these earthly sorrows."
