A woman has told how the Government Emergency Alert led to her husband finding out about her affair. The woman, who has been cheating on her partner for the past five months, was caught red-handed when the loud warning notification led her husband to a secret phone she uses to text her lover.
Verity, who did not wish to reveal her full name, claims she feels "dirty" and is now guilty over the affair and how her husband found out. Her partner "can't even look her in the eye", however they are still living together in what she has described as an "awkward mess".
Verity, 34, says she began the affair after feeling like a "third wheel" at home with her husband and son. As a mum, she felt like she had "lost her identity" as she looked after the household and her son, which led to her starting a new relationship.
"Ever since we've had our son, who is absolutely the light of our lives don’t get me wrong, I've just felt like an unappreciated third wheel who is also the glue that holds the family together," Verity told the Mirror. "I guess I felt like I lost my identity in some ways. And as a vibrant person who loves to get out and do stuff, I found that really hard. Now I'm just the mum."
Cooking and cleaning after coming home from work, she felt she was working 16-hour shifts with no support from her husband. "I really feel like he will never understand the mental load you take on as a mum that just doesn't even cross a man's mind," Verity continued. "It's exhausting. I didn't set out to hurt my husband, I just wanted to do something for me, as a person, not a mum."
Close to five months ago Verity turned to the dating site illicitencounters.com and started having chats with other men. She hit it off with one person, who she has been seeing at weekends behind her husband's back. While the mum admits she knows it is wrong to be seeing someone else, she credits the time with her lover for making her 'feel alive'.
"My husband is everything, the father to our child. My lover was just this wild hobby that made me feel alive at the weekends. It was just an escape from all the stress of daily life," she said. "Our relationship was mainly sexual so we weren’t away with each other for long periods of time. We just really connected on that level."
But the secrets and lies were rumbled on Sunday, April 23, when the Government Emergency Alert was signalled at 3pm on her hidden phone. Verity says that she would usually keep the device locked away in her car, but on Sunday had left it in the pocket of her coat, which was hung up on a peg in their hallway.
She and her husband were painting their son's bedroom when the alert - which is being trialled to warn the public about potential dangers such as floods - was triggered. "I was sitting there on my 'real' phone looking at room inspiration and it didn't go off, but my fricking second phone sounded like the world was about to end," Verity recalled.
"I tried to play it dumb like 'what's that?! and fake trying to look for it whilst urgently trying to get downstairs before my husband, but he got downstairs quicker than me, found it in my coat pocket before I could hide it and then that was it, game over. Confusion kicked in, and then the questions started."
Verity felt like there was no point even trying to make up an excuse, but she couldn't bring herself to admit that she had been having a five-month-long affair.
"I didn't know what to do in the moment - my heart literally sank to my feet and I could feel my face flush so much it felt like it was literally burning like it would just melt off any second," Verity explained.
"I stood there frozen with a weird look on my face. I just remember him shouting 'Come on then, tell me'. When he said 'Is there someone else?' I just nodded and felt like I wanted to disappear. Worst moment of my life."
While she believes the way her husband found out was "terrible", she doesn't think she deserves all of the blame for their marital problems.
"I know people will sit there and be like 'Well, serves you right'. But people have affairs for all sorts of reasons," she continued. "I'm sorry I've hurt him and no one should have to deal with that. And I’m probably never going to forgive myself but also, I had my reasons."
Verity isn't sure if her lover knows that their secret has been revealed, as her husband has confiscated the phone. She says she will log into her dating account online and let him know, but she now isn't sure about her feelings for him.
"I need some time to process the last few days," she said. "I just kind of feel dirty and that the passion has gone. Maybe that’s just the shock. I really don't know how I feel right now."
Verity has come clean to her family about what has happened, but regrets it. They're just as angry with their daughter as her husband is, but is hoping to stay with her sister for a few days 'until the dust settles'.
On whether she thinks there is any coming back from this, Verity added: "If he ever forgives me... it's still pretty raw and we're still living together which is so awkward right now. He can’t even look at me.... it's all just a mess."
Don't miss the latest news from around Scotland and beyond - Sign up to our daily newsletter here.
