Walt Disney wanted his theme parks to be the happiest places on earth. So it’s a problem when attractions turn people into protesters.
It happened 23 years ago with Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride. Today, Mr. Trump’s wild ride has created another dilemma for the Magic Kingdom.
The Hall of Presidents has been a staple attraction since the park opened in 1971, featuring animatronic figures of every U.S. president. Now the Trump-fueled insurrection at the U.S. Capitol has renewed calls for Disney to banish the 45th president.
Should he stay or should he go?
Neither. It’s time for Disney to put this attraction out to pasture.
No doubt, the comings and goings of Disney attractions isn’t as weighty an issue as the actual impeachment of Donald J. Trump — his second. It is a window into how political tribalism has evolved over the past 50 years and now disrupts everyday life.
You can blame Trump (we do), or Nancy Pelosi or QAnon or the rise of social media. Whatever the causes, the 2021 atmosphere is not what Walt Disney envisioned when he conjured up his empire’s first animatronic figure in 1964.
It was of Abraham Lincoln, the man 53% of surveyed Republicans two years ago thought was an inferior president to Trump. It’s doubtful even Melania really believes that now.
After four years of saying he wanted to make America great again, Trump ended up making Americans revolt against their own government. That’s a damning distinction, but removing just the animatronic Trump would put Disney on a slippery presidential slope.
Is he worse than the impeached Andrew Johnson, who botched Reconstruction? Warren G. Harding’s scandals would have melted the internet. Woodrow Wilson said Black people were “an ignorant and inferior race” and constructed policy accordingly.
In the wake of last summer’s social justice protests, Disney World decided to change the Splash Mountain theme because of its antebellum imagery.
The Hall of Presidents, however, has 12 men who owned slaves sharing the stage with Trump. If you’re going to present U.S. history, you can’t skip the awkward spots. And these days, anything slightly political is going to make some guests uncomfortable.
That’s why Disney banned a guy who kept unfurling Trump banners a couple of years ago. But can it ban the Trump robot without upsetting millions of potential customers who pulled the electoral lever for the real thing?
Conversely, can it keep him around and not drive millions of Joe Biden voters crazy?
Can’t live with him, can’t live without him. As with Trump lawyers contesting the election, Disney is in a no-win situation.
Officials have not commented, but they must long for days in 1998 when guests dressed in green T-shirts and carried signs that said ‘New Wart Order!” to protest the removal of Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.
The attraction was a cult favorite, taking passengers on a slow, dark journey that ended in hell itself. It was replaced by a demon-free Winnie The Pooh ride.
The Hall of Presidents show is Disneyesque enough during the initial video presentation. It’s actually hard not to get a lump in your throat hearing tales of the leadership provided by men like Washington, Lincoln and Teddy Roosevelt.
Then the blue curtain rises on all 44 figures, and you notice the man who took America on another trip through hell.
At least it sort of looks like Trump.
The joke for years has been that Disney ordered a Hillary Clinton figure in 2016, thinking she was a lock to take the presidency. When Trump won, Disney decided to put Hillary in a blue suit and throw an orange toupee on her head.
Hall of Presidents historians say the first catcalls came when Hillary’s husband was installed. The occasional booing and hissing increased as George W. Bush and Barack Obama joined the troupe.
Now the stage front has decorative metal spikes to keep any would-be assaulters at bay. Security guards stand watch. The way things are going, Disney might need to build a fleet of animatronic Secret Service agents to protect the figure standing center stage.
“It’s a privilege to serve as the president of the United States,” the Trumpbot says. “To stand here among so many great leaders of our past.”
You can’t help recalling what the narrator said when she talked about the nation’s first great leader:
“His final act may be the most important of all.”
Washington’s final act was to decline to run for a third term. He didn’t want the presidency to turn into monarchy, so he retired to his Mount Vernon home.
Trump’s refusal to either graciously accept defeat or slink back to Mar-a-Lago turned into his defining final act.
Despite that, the Hall of Presidents can’t just pretend Trump never took the oath of office. He would always be in the Hall, raising the temperature and undermining Walt Disney’s overarching goal.
The founder wanted his theme parks to be fantasy lands where people could escape the real world. With the Hall of Presidents, there’s no escaping it.
Instead of getting rid of Trump, Disney should just shut down down the whole show. It could build an attraction that honors America without triggering guests on all sides of the political spectrum.
Or it could just bring back Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.
At least that character wouldn’t need security guards to keep things from getting crazy.
