Ed Sheeran says he had never experienced grief before the death of his friend Jamal Edwards and the feelings that came with it absolutely floored him.
The Shivers singer, 32, can be seen sobbing as he addresses the issue in his new Disney Plus docu-series Ed Sheeran: The Sum Of It All.
Music entrepreneur Edwards, who founded the music platform SBTV in 2006 which helped launch Sheeran’s career, died in February 2022 at the age of 31.
An inquest found that he died of a cardiac arrest following a late-night alcohol and cocaine session.
Speaking to the camera, Sheeran said he “hadn’t experienced grief and loss” before and admitted it “took over his whole life”.
Giving further clarity, Sheeran’s wife Cherry Seaborn, said he had also been unable to process Edward’s death fully as it came weeks after her cancer diagnosis.
Reflecting on his and Edwards’ friendship, Sheeran said: “I basically lived in his bedroom. His mum thought we were having a relationship.
“Jamal died in the morning. I was at his mum’s house at midday. It’s Caribbean culture, you go to the family home for nine days and nine nights. On the ninth night, they throw a big party.
“Grief instantly ends your youth. The funeral was like 30 people but he knows like 10,000 people.”
In another scene, Sheeran can be seen attending a cookout in memory of his late pal.
He became emotional as he sat in the back of a car while thinking about celebrating Edwards’ birthday without him there.
“It’s still very raw. It’s very real. His grave… we go past it a lot; it just feels so weird that he’s in amongst loads of people he didn’t know,” he said.
“It’s all pure sadness. It’s horrible. I know everyone goes through it. It’s a common thing that you can’t avoid.”
He continued: “I felt I hadn’t really grown up until I experienced grief, loss. It just took over my whole life. It’s just weird. I was thinking I don’t want to cry in front of 78,000 people. I found myself really close at times.
“It’s just mad, straight back to it. The show must go on.”
