A Dumfries mum is raising awareness of domestic abuse a year after her daughter died in hospital days after attempting to take her own life.
Heartbroken Rochelle Gray believes 24-year-old Marley was driven to suicide by her former partner.
Rochelle, 44, is now warning other victims and their families to speak out and ask for help if they find themselves in a domestic abuse situation.
She said: “It won’t be brushed under the carpet if you ask for help.
“There’s help available for victims so don’t put up with it. And I’d urge any family members not to ignore warning signs if they think there’s something wrong.
“Make sure you keep in touch with your loved one and keep the lines of communication open.”
Marley’s ex-partner Dawson McAllister, 22, formerly of Castle Douglas, was taken to court where he eventually admitted carrying out a sustained campaign of domestic abuse between June 2019 and February 24 last year.
He had denied the offences for seven months, forcing distraught Rochelle to prepare to give evidence against him.
McAllister escaped a prison sentence at Dumfries Sheriff Court in September when he was sentenced to 300 hours of unpaid work, two years of attending the Caledonian Programme plus eight months of house arrest.
A sheriff described his behaviour towards Marley as “controlling and awful” and told him he should be “utterly ashamed” of himself.
Rochelle said: “Just before McAllister was charged the first time while Marley was still alive, the Scottish Parliament introduced the Domestic Abuse Act and people need to be aware of it.”
The legislation covers not just physical abuse, but psychological and emotional treatment and coercive and controlling behaviour, where abusers isolate their victim from their friends and relatives or control their finances.
Rochelle said: “Victims think they won’t be listened to, but they will.
“Marley told me everything that was going on and I told her if I ever phoned her and she didn’t answer, I’d phone the police straight away in case anything had happened to her.
“Two weeks before she died I asked police to do a welfare check on her because I was so worried.
“I knew how much she was being manipulated by McAllister but I was relieved that they weren’t together any longer and she was living closer to me.
“But he wouldn’t leave her alone and there was no reasoning with him.
“Marley turned into someone we didn’t recognise.
“Before she met him she was so easygoing, bubbly and caring; such a kind and beautiful soul.
“Afterwards, she lost weight, stopped doing her hair and make-up, stopped seeing friends.
“In the end, it all got too much for her. She just couldn’t take any more.”
On February 24 last year, Rochelle received a phone call telling her an ambulance was outside Marley’s home in Balmoral Road.
She rushed to the scene and collapsed on the ground when medics told her she couldn’t go to hospital with Marley because of coronavirus restrictions.
When she arrived at Dumfries Infirmary, Rochelle was told Marley was unlikely to survive any more than five hours.
She briefly pulled through but died on March 2, leaving her family distraught.
Rochelle said: “When I got to A&E and was told she only had five hours to live, I was hysterical.
“I was sent home because of Covid rules but I was phoning the hospital all through the night because Marley kept hanging on.
“The next day, I was allowed to be with her and I didn’t leave her room because I was scared that if I did, I wouldn’t be allowed back in.
“Me, my son Kyle, my husband and Marley’s dad were all there at the end when she died on March 2.”
Marley had signed up to be an organ donor and her kidneys, liver and pancreas have saved the lives of three men.
A year later, Rochelle is struggling to come to terms with her loss.
“I was so focussed on fighting for justice for Marley that I don’t think I’ve had a proper chance to grieve,” she said.
“I just feel totally lost without her. Her dog Bonnie is with me now and brings me a bit of comfort.
“They were like two peas in a pod and adored each other.
“It’s nice to be able to give Bonnie a cuddle, but there’s nothing I wouldn’t do to be able to cuddle my girl again.”
