Name: Dry Christmas.
Age: I’m 23, Grandad. Making me gen Z.
And I’m a boomer – old enough to know better. But ’tis the season to be merry and all that. And merry’s exactly how I plan to get. Now pour me an eggnog. Really? OK …
And one for yourself. Er … I’m good, thanks.
I know, it’s not to everyone’s taste. How about I mix us a mighty bowl of wassail in which the apples are hissing and bubbling? I don’t even know what that is, but that’s another no. Thank you.
Crack open one of those hipster pale ales, then. I have some 0% ones in, I’ll take one of those.
What? You mean as in alcohol-free? That’s exactly what I mean.
But it’s Christmas! A) it’s not. Yet. And b) I’m having a dry Christmas this year.
No no no, silly – you’re confused. It’s dry January! That’s what people do, in order to cleanse the body after being nonstop hammered over Christmas and new year. Well, yes yes yes, actually. I’m going to have a dry Christmas. And it’s not just me.
Who else? Loads of us. A poll of 2,000 adults (who celebrate the festival) found that 78% of us born after 1996 are planning a dry Christmas.
What has the world come to? Whose survey is it anyway? It was conducted by OnePoll on behalf of Budweiser …
They make beer! That’s like turkeys voting for Christmas … only kinda the opposite. They also make zero-alcohol beer …
God help us! Brian Perkins, the head of Budweiser UK, says: “Moderation is no longer limited to awareness months and days – it’s now part of our everyday lives.”
Not my everyday life, Brian. He continues: “Efforts to moderate in January have been brought forward into the festive period, and throughout the rest of the year, as we see more people choosing no- and low-alcohol alternatives as their drink of choice.”
What about us – how did the boomers do in this so-called survey? Less well …
Or better! Only 17% of you have even considered a dry Christmas …
Get in! With just 6% making the pledge.
Hallelujah! Brian says moderation doesn’t affect people’s fun. And 64% of those surveyed said they were keen to moderate their alcohol intake longer-term, not just over the festive period.
Gen Z? More like gen zzzzz. Just thinking about your health, wellbeing, financial mindfulness and the empowerment of making personal choices, Grandad.
Do say: “Hair of the dog is not just for Christmas. It’s not for life, either.”
Don’t say: [in the style of Father Jack] “DRINK!”
