Every medium needs a defining love story. Film had Bogie and Bacall. Music had Paul and Linda. Literature had Cathy and Heathcliff. And now Twitter has you Shane Warne (@warne888) and your girlfriend Elizabeth Hurley (@ElizabethHurley). Not for you the bog-standard tweets of a professional cricketer. Your Twitter is a whirling dervish of excitement, romance and, erm, appreciation for the music of Russell Crowe ("Russell Crow's new album is great – download it on iTunes if you have not heard it..") One should never be too complacent, however. So here are some Twitter dos and don'ts for you.
Cyber love
While many civilian tweeters have long been happy to enter into public flirtations and steamy DM twanking sessions, celebrities have been conducting their liaisons via more traditional means. That is until you and Elizabeth came along.
From the very first flirty tweet there was a seismic shift in the Twitter landscape. Your account became less about the cricket chatter, and more about the world sitting back and ticking off the major landmarks in your relationship, one by one. Whether it has been deciding where to go on dates ("Where is the sexiest place to take Elizabeth for lunch?") or keeping up with each other when you're apart ("how's NY treating my beautiful sexy girlfriend ????????") you guys have changed the way the game has been played. I urge you to ignore the "get a room" merchants, Warney, and just keep doing what you're doing. It's Twitter gold.
Rise above makeover madness
Your new style has been talk of the town for weeks now, ever since the pictures of your post-Hurley makeover hit the newspapers. Crueller tongues than mine have suggested that you now look like a "melted Ken doll", but I think it's great when a gentleman makes an effort. Unfortunately you seem to be taking some of the criticism to heart: "So you hacks that keep reporting negative about EH or my face – enough dribble. Get off her back, all is great thank you I Feel better now !" Rise above it, babe, and keep going for those facials.
Enough with the parrot
One of the things what long-term showbiz watchers could never have predicted a few years agowas that Hurley would have a fake twitter account pretending to be her parrot, Ping Pong (@pingponghurley). Now I'm all for a bit of fun, Shane, but the flirtatious parrot tweets ("I miss you ping See you soon,yes baring gifts") are a lame step too far. Nip it in the bud. Pronto.
Love @scouserachel
Rachel Roberts
