The devastated family of an 18-year-old woman whose life support machine was turned off on Friday after what they believe was a "cry for help" have paid tribute to her. Beauty student Alex Duce had been in hospital since Sunday, September 11.
Her foster sister and the parents who raised her have spoken out to raise awareness of the mental health struggles she faced and how tough they say life is for young people today. They said "bubbly and popular" Alex, who studied at Ebbw Vale College, had been dealing with anxiety and struggled with self confidence.
Alex had a happy childhood growing up with her foster family and biological brother Ellis in Rhyd y Cae, her foster sister Kayleigh Morgan, 34, said. Alex’s foster mother Mandy Hughes said she’ll never forget Alex’s “cheekiness and personality”.
“Alex was 18 in May just gone, and she had been doing her hair and beauty course in college,” Mandy, 56, said. “She struggled with the course but she pushed herself to keep attending and she was doing well.
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“She was a very bubbly and popular girl with lots of friends. When she became 17, perhaps 17 and a half, she wanted her own little bit of independence. We helped her to get a place, but I think she became lonely and a little bit of depression kicked in - even though we were always here for her and she’d Facetime me four or five times most days and we’d have a good old chat.
“She started mentioning she was having a little bit of anxiety before leaving the house."
Alex was suddenly rushed to the Prince Charles Hospital in Merthyr Tydfil from her flat in Tredegar after taking an overdose two months ago, Mandy said. Days later, while her mental condition seemed to be improving, she asked Mandy when she was adopted, and had the date tattooed onto her chest.
“Now I think back, I wonder whether that was a sign she was about to do something,” Mandy said. “She sent me a message not long ago thanking me and my husband for taking her and Ellis into our family, and that we’d never know how much we were loved. It does make me think, did she plan this? These thoughts have been in my head.”
After not hearing from Alex for more than a day last Saturday Mandy called the police on Sunday morning. “We continued to phone and phone and kept going to her flat, but we didn’t actually know if she was in there,” Mandy continued.
“We were banging on the door and calling but there were no replies. When the police came and started trying to get into the flat we then heard a loud bang, which was Alex falling to the floor. They struggled to get in, it took them about 25 minutes, but she’d gone when we got in.
“It makes me wonder whether she did it as a cry for help, because she waited until she thought we could get in. I think it was a cry for help that has gone drastically wrong. I really really believe she wouldn’t have gone this far.”
Officers resuscitated Alex at the scene and she was urgently transferred to the Prince Charles Hospital again, where she was on life support until Mandy made the heart-breaking decision on Friday to switch the machine off. Alex’s organs have been donated, already saving the lives of four people.
Kayleigh said: “I’m so proud we’ve done that and I do want to highlight the lives she will save. Alex had a heart of gold. She was a diva, and she always had to have the last word, but her heart has always been in the right place. We will miss her so much.”
Alex’s family want to share her story to help raise awareness of the difficulties facing young women in modern society, and the impact those challenges can have on mental wellbeing. They have urged anyone struggling to speak before it’s too late.
“Life is tough now for young people, tougher than when I was that age,” Kayleigh said. “Years ago, when relationships ended, for example, it’d be done with and forgotten. But things now are rubbed in your face on social media.
“Social media, I think, has a lot to do with poor mental health in young people. It’s not always a good thing having everyone in close contact like that.”
Paying tribute to Alex, Mandy added: “I took her in when she was three and her brother was five. Alex was a very happy and loud child - her brother much quieter. She was an outgoing person, she loved life, she loved being around people, and she was a generous, kind spirit.
“Alex loved drama. If there was drama Alex was there. She knew more about other people’s business than what they knew themselves.
“But she did struggle with self confidence, and she became self conscious as she grew older. She never felt she was as good at things as others.
“I am angry, shocked, and in total disbelief. She’d sometimes cry and I wouldn’t be able to find out why. Then ten minutes later she’d ring me and she’d be happy again, about to head off out with her friends. It was very complicated in the end. We’re all devastated. She’ll always be in our thoughts.”
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