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A woman on Reddit is questioning whether or not it is appropriate for her mother to get a tattoo of her husband’s initials.
In a recent post to the “Am I Overreacting?” subreddit, the woman explained that she’s been with her husband for five years and considers him her “soulmate.” Her mother recently got a tattoo with only her initials and her brother’s, but she now wants to add another.
“This time she’s getting three hearts on her wrist, with the first initial in my husband’s, my brother’s, and my name,” the post read. “When I commented on how it was very sweet of her to get my husband’s initial, but it was a little odd, she went on a speech about how he is her son now too and she loves him like a son and she knows he’s my soulmate and that we will never split up.”
She clarified that she didn’t see herself splitting up with her husband, but still didn’t support the idea on the off-chance that she and her husband were no longer together at some point.
“Now, I don’t think we will either and I told her that was very kind and true but I’m also just a pragmatist in the sense that anything can happen, even if the chance is insanely slim. My husband and I think it’s weird, but we both agree it’s her body and her choice,” her Reddit post concluded.
AIO: my mom is getting my husband’s first initial tattooed on her
byu/kitkat_splat inAmIOverreacting
After posting, many people turned to the comments section to share their opinions on whether or not she was overreacting.
Some commenters thought the woman was overreacting and suggested that her mother likely just viewed her husband as a member of the family and that a tattoo was a way to include him.
“Personally I do think this is an overreaction,” one comment began. “Maybe it seems weird to some but he’s been with you five years, that’s a long time to be close to someone’s family, and I can see her seeing him as much as a child as you two (especially if you all were friends for longer than that, like depending on how y’all met.)”
The commenter also noted that because she was only going to be tattooing her husband’s initials, fixing the tattoo would be simple and the heart could either be filled or covered.
A mother also chimed in using the comments section, writing: “As a mother, I can tell you that my daughter’s boyfriend feels a lot like one of my children to me. Of course, there is no deep unconditional love like I have for my children and if he would even hurt my daughter I’m sure that feeling passes reeeaallly quickly. But he did feel like ‘one of the brood’ very quickly.
“I can totally imagine someone who does like tattooed initials and who has maybe not encountered many failed relationships to include the initials of someone who feels as part of the family.”
Other commenters expressed how the gesture could be seen as “weird.”
“No, that’s weird,” one comment began. “I was with my first husband for 17 years, and yea, soulmate....blah blah.....’ Welp, he’s an ex. I guess you just have to ensure the next one has the same initial.”
“‘It’s weird, but it’s her body’ is not an overreaction, no,” another commenter wrote. “Because it is weird. But it is her body. Letting her know that you guys find it sweet but strange is about as far as you should take it. That gives her a moment to reconsider, but also isn’t such a terrible pressure that it might damage your relationship with her.”