Lloyd Johnston knows all too well what it feels like to be racially vilified on the footy field.
The now 18-year-old Yanyuwa man from Borroloola — around 1000 kilometres south-east of Darwin — was playing in an under-16 game when he says he heard a woman in the crowd call out to one of his opponents.
"And she yells out, 'hit the black c**t,'" he recalls.
It wasn't the first time he had experienced racism, but the feeling has stayed with him three years on.
"You get really green in your stomach," he says.
"It's a very bad feeling that one."
Johnston will fly out this week to participate in the AFL National Draft Combine, alongside 67 other young players hoping to impress prospective Aussie Rules clubs.
The league has been rocked in recent weeks by allegations of racism against Indigenous players.
Last week, the AFL Players Association released the results of a survey which found a third of First Nations players or players of colour had experienced racism.
It also found less than a fifth of the players who made a complaint about racism thought the incident was dealt with properly.
Johnston only picked up footy three years ago, but has long dreamed of running out into a packed MCG.
"Watching AFL on TV, watching how they play with the crowd, how big the crowd is, I just think 'Wow, I would really love to play football with a crowd… that would be cheering on'," he says.
"That would mean a lot."
'He could do whatever he puts his mind to'
Aaron Motlop coaches Johnston's team at the Darwin-based Wanderers Football Club.
The club's playing base is about 75 per cent Indigenous, from their premier league team down to the juniors.
In Motlop's eyes, Johnston could go far.
"His natural abilities, just unreal," Motlop says.
"He could do whatever he puts his mind to."
Motlop himself, a Larrakia man, has played interstate, and has several cousins who have played in the AFL.
He says living away from home can be especially tough for Aboriginal players.
"Aboriginal people up here are just so connected to family and friends and the land and the environment, that's where they feel comfortable," he says.
"And like anything, you take someone out of an environment...it's going to take a bit of time to adapt to it."
The Northern Territory Football League has had to deal with its own instances of racism.
In 2020, a player from St Mary's was banned for life for racially abusing a player from the Tiwi Bombers — the first all Aboriginal side to play in a semi-professional competition.
Motlop says it was a turning point for the competition.
"I applaud the league but also people to put their hand up and say 'that's not right,'" he said.
"Because if we want to make our game better and also our community better, we've got to be able to have that respect for each other."
'Some of them may decide not to play'
Eileen Cummings is the grandmother of Gold Coast Suns player Malcolm Rosas Jr., a Ngalakan and Remberrnga man from Darwin.
She says her grandson being able to maintain his close relationship with his family while he plays interstate has been vital to his success.
"Malcolm's going to be there for a while. And I don't want him to feel insecure and unhappy in what he's doing because that was his dream," Cummings says.
"When his father and his cousin died, he was allowed to come home for those funerals. And he was allowed to go back to home to see his grandparents, so he's had that interaction with them.
"And if he didn't have that, I think he wouldn't be secure in his own self."
She says if the league doesn't support Aboriginal players or address allegations of racism effectively, some will turn their backs on the game.
"Some of them may decide not to play," she says.
"And I know some of them that have come in from remote communities to Darwin to play have felt that way as well."
Johnston, who will fly to Melbourne on Thursday for the Draft Combine, says he remains optimistic about the future.
"I feel so proud about my journey to what I've become now from what I was before," he says.
"Racism will not stop me from achieving my goals and dreams."
