Some days, like today, nothing works, Jim Cramer admitted to his Mad Money viewers Thursday, after another major selloff on Wall Street. The sellers just can't take the pain and they're heading for the exits in droves.
Cramer said we're in a period of "great readjustment," where investors are figuring out what they're willing to pay for companies that aren't making money today, but could make a lot of money in the future. They're also weighing what to pay for companies that used to make a lot of money, but now make less with rising interest rates and a slowing economy.
"The smooth ride we've had is over. In this market you need a helmet," Cramer quipped.
Case in point: Block (SQ). This payments company, formerly known as Square, rose from $200 to $280 a share last year, but has been falling since August, including another 9.6% Thursday. Why? Investors simply aren't willing to pay last year's prices. It's the same story with Affirm (AFRM), which has plunged from $168 to just $21 a share. Both of these stocks were expensive, and they don't offer dividend protection for investors.
There are still hundreds of stocks that he likes, Cramer said, but there are thousands that just don't work right now.
Executive Decision: Adobe Systems
In his first "Executive Decision" segment, Cramer spoke with Shantanu Narayen, chairman and CEO of Adobe (ADBE), the leader in creativity software.
Narayen said that innovation is still alive and well, and Adobe remains at the forefront of creativity around the world. He said more and more things are happening inside of digital worlds and creators need tools to build those new immersive, 3D worlds. That's why Adobe has partnered with Meta Platforms (META), a company with big plans for their virtual worlds.
When asked about inflation, Narayen noted that he's been amazed that digital products have not been included in consumer price indices. As more of our world goes digital, digital products are becoming a huge part of our economy. Digital products are the counterbalance to inflation in the real world.
Executive Decision: Uber
For his second "Executive Decision" segment, Cramer also sat down with Dara Khosrowshahi, CEO of Uber Technologies (UBER).
When asked about the changing expectations on Wall Street, Khosrowshahi explained that we live in complicated times, and during complicated times, investors demand more than just growth at any cost. They want growth, but also earnings at the same time. That's why Uber has made changes to keep the trust of shareholders.
Khosrowshahi added that Uber is ideally suited for recessions, because it has low fixed costs and the diversity in its businesses means that mobility and delivery aren't typically down at the same time. Uber's size and scale will help it weather any economic storm, Khosrowshahi said.
Executive Decision: Splunk
For his final "Executive Decision" segment, Cramer checked in Gary Steele, the new president and CEO of Splunk (SPLK) and formerly the head of the cybersecurity company Proofpoint.
Steele said there are similarities between Proofpoint and Splunk. Both companies served Fortune 500 customers and both helped customers solve their most pressing cyber problems.
Splunk is making the transition from on-premise software to subscriptions in the cloud, Steele added, and last quarter, 57% of its revenues came from the cloud.
Splunk is pioneering software that helps companies with observability, which tells engineers exactly what applications are doing. This is becoming vitally important in today's world, when engineers need to know whether they're dealing with system failures or security events.
When asked about growth, Steele said he believes in balanced, durable long-term growth combined with increasing gross margins and cash flows.
Lightning Round
In the Lightning Round, Cramer was bullish on Berkshire Hathaway (BRK.B), Anheuser-Busch InBev (BUD), Constellation Brands (STZ) and Enterprise Products Partners (EPD).
Cramer was bearish on Portillo's (PTLO) and Six Flags (SIX).
Tech Exodus
In his "No Huddle Offense" segment, Cramer warned "the tech exodus from Silicon Valley is coming." That was his takeaway after talking to Bay Area CEOs all this week.
Many tech companies are looking to move their headquarters outside of California, with areas like Atlanta, Austin, Texas, and Florida being often mentioned, he said. Other areas, like Ohio, are seeing huge investments from the likes of Intel (INTC) and others.
Then there are the workers. Many unprofitable tech companies have already begun laying off workers as fears of a recession set in. Those workers, many of whom can work remotely, are fleeing Silicon Valley for less expensive areas.
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