This certainly wasn’t Conan O’Brien’s first rodeo when it comes to award shows, but the first-time Oscars host had all eyes on his opening monologue today — and dare we say, he really brought it??
Kicking off with a pre-taped segment where he emerged from inside Demi Moore’s body in a nod to The Substance (yup, that happened) the comedian entertained the room with his trademark roast humour we know and love.
Missed the opening? Here were some of our fave bits.
No hiding from Karla Sofía Gascón’s Twitter rant
It was probably going to be mentioned at some point this evening, but ol’ mate Conan decided to get straight into the Emilia Perez drama in his monologue.
“Little fact for you: Anora uses the F-word 479 times. That’s three more than the record set by Karla Sofía Gascón’s publicist,” Conan remarked.
Cutting to Karla, the cameras managed to catch a smile and a bow, with plenty of giggles in the background.
But that’s not all, because Conan had another cheeky jab up his sleeve: “Karla Sofia Gascón is here tonight and Karla, if you’re going to tweet about the Oscars, remember — my name is Jimmy Kimmel.”
Tapping in Adam Sandler
We’ve all been known to give up on a day off and dress like Adam Sandler every now and then (think baggy tees and basketball shorts) and it looks like the joke’s not lost on the actor.
Also featuring in the monologue, Sandler was pulled up by Conan for his decidedly less formal attire aka hoodie and basketball shorts.
“Adam, what are you wearing?” O’Brien asked. “You’re dressed like a guy playing video poker at 2 am.”
Joining the bit, Sandler snapped back: “Nobody even thought about what I was wearing until you brought it up. I like the way I look. Because I’m a good person. I don’t care about what I wear and what I don’t wear.”
He then proceeded to leave the show in a faux hissy-fit, but not before taking a second to call out Oscar nominee Timothée Chalamet in his trademark voice, earning a hug and audience laughter.
You can peep the clip here.
Of course, Timmy also got another mention in the monologue when Conan noted he’s nominated for his portrayal of Bob Dylan in A Complete Unknown.
“Bob Dylan wanted to be here tonight, but not that badly,” Conan joked.
Timmy couldn’t escape the Dune 2 jokes either, with Conan remarking director Denis Villeneuveve reportedly banned phones on the set: “Apparently his actors kept Googling, ‘What is his movie about?'”
King of self-deprecation
Everyone loves a good self-burn and Conan certainly didn’t hold back.
Listing out the names of three Oscar nominees, he pipped: “A Complete Unknown, A Real Pain, and Nosferatu… these are just some of the names I was called on the red carpet.”
He added: “I think two were fair.”
In another instance, joking about the film Baby Girl — which was not nominated at the Oscars this year — Conan remarked: “Antonio Banderas plays a man who doesn’t know how to give his wife an orgasm.
“Banderas describes it as the most challenging role of his career… should have come to me man, should have come to me.”
Poking the streaming giants
Netflix and Amazon Prime also got a call-out, with Conan speaking for all of us when it comes to those pesky subscription price increases.
“Netflix leads all studios with an impressive 18 — count them — 18 price increases. I think they can beat that next year,” he joked, alluding to the platform’s 18 Oscar nominations this year, including 13 for Emilia Perez.
A little elbow to Amazon wasn’t far behind, given the recent news the studio would take over the James Bond franchise after Barbara Broccoli and Michael G. Wilson signed over the rights in February.
“Big news recently, Amazon has taken over the 007 franchise, and they just announced the next James Bond,” Conan said.
“Did you know that? Yeah, it’s Amazon senior vice president of global affairs Steve Goldstein. Ladies love him!”
Honorary mentions
Of course, we’ve also rounded up some of the other honorary mentions of the evening:
“I loved The Brutalist, I really did. I didn’t want it to end, and luckily, it didn’t.”
“Wicked is nominated tonight in 10 categories. It’s the perfect movie for anyone who finished The Wizard of Oz and thought, ‘But where did all the minor characters go to college? That’s the story.’”
“Conclave’s logline is: ‘A movie about the Catholic Church, but don’t worry.’”
If you’re keen to check out the awards night, you catch it live on Channel 7 and 7Plus. It will also be available to stream on Disney+.
Lead image: Getty Images / Twitter
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