Many people claim to rank among a celebrity’s biggest fans. However, unless you know them on a very personal level, you can’t ever truly be sure what hides behind their public persona. All of us wear different ‘masks’ and subtly change our behavior around different people. Nearly anyone whose livelihood depends on them entertaining the entire globe is no different.
The r/AskReddit online community shed some light on which stars are—in fact—completely different in their private lives compared to how they behave in public, on the screen, or on the stage. From Cher and Adam Sandler to Gordon Ramsay and Sting, scroll down for a deeper glimpse into these beloved stars’ lives.
#1
Clint Eastwood knows every person’s name on set from the caterer’s to the electricians. He eats with the employees, takes breaks with them. Stays late with them. Never hid in a trailer. He never had security with him on set. He introduces himself as Clint. No calling him Mr. Eastwood. It’s like he’s honored to meet you. One of the nicest, most down to earth people ever. I’ll never forget meeting him.
Image credits: MissPhistopheles
Bored Panda was very curious to learn about the gap between our private and public personas, so we reached out to Glenn Geher, Ph.D. He is a professor of psychology at the State University of New York at New Paltz and a published author, and kindly answered our questions.
We asked Dr. Geher about why human beings tend to adjust their behavior around different groups of people and in various environments. He walked us through this.
"People definitely evolved to adjust behavior based on the nature of situations that they run into. Behavior at a wedding is usually joyful, while behavior at a funeral is typically solemn. People who are good at 'reading the room' and adjusting their behaviors based on the demands of particular situations tend to navigate the waters of the social world better than those who are low on this skill," he explained to Bored Panda.
#2
Many years ago, i was fortunate to have drinks with a group of chefs that included Gordon Ramsay. I know he's been shown to not really be the raging hot-head he is portrayed as. But he really could not have been a nicer guy.
Image credits: instant_ramen_chef
#3
Adam Sandler. He's apparently a really good guy who tries to film his movies in his home state of New Hampshire to boost tourism. He's incredibly loyal to his SNL friends always trying to put them in his movies and is a great Dad.
Image credits: Yotsubauniverse
"The field of acting seems to harness this feature of our evolved psychology—with better actors essentially being those who are particularly effective at adjusting their behaviors to conform to certain roles or situations, even if such behavior does not match their natural inclinations," he said in an email.
Considering how advantageous it appears to be behaviourally flexible, we were wondering whether it was worth bridging the gap between our private and public personas at all. According to Dr. Geher, it's important to consider our relationship with our most authentic selves here. There's a balance that needs to be found.
#4
Supposedly Robin Williams was very introverted and quiet
RIP.
Image credits: maybethisiswrong
#5
Weird Al Yankovic is supposedly really quiet, overly polite, introverted and mild-mannered offstage. Even to his own friends and family.
Image credits: tucakeane
#6
Cher is a notorious introvert. Yet her persona is flashy outfits, outlandish personality and entertainer. She just likes to go home and be alone at the end of the day.
Image credits: BobbyFan54
"While adjusting one's behavior based on situational demands is very human and often appropriate, consistently presenting oneself as very different from one's core, authentic self might be stressful for various reasons," Dr. Geher told us.
"So, while I would say that it is important for people to be able to be behaviorally flexible, being so should not come at the cost of being true to oneself. Once again, I'd say, Shakespeare was right: 'To thine own self, be true.'"
#7
Bruce Willis is (was?) a book lover.
I read recently how Bruce Willis is going downhill with dementia, but what struck me is the article said that he had always been a voracious reader. Don’t know why but it hit me funny, that Mr Action man was a bookworm. (And sadly, is losing that now too).
Image credits: Galliagamer
#8
Snoop Dogg actually hasn't committed a crime in many decades.
Image credits: Kafkaja
#9
Will Ferrell
I’ve heard from several people I know that have met & worked with Will that he’s nothing like his onscreen characters. He’s actually pretty laid back and soft spoken off camera. Totally what you wouldn’t expect based on some of the roles he’s known for.
Image credits: RockNRoll85
With the spread of the internet (5.45 billion global users and counting!) and the continued rise of social media (5.17 billion users worldwide), it’s easier now than ever to follow what other people are doing. This doesn’t just mean what your family, friends, and colleagues are doing.
You can, without much difficulty, constantly stay up to date with what your heroes are doing, whether they’re actors or athletes you admire, musicians who molded your taste in music, or comedians who never fail to brighten up your day. This has massively contributed to the spread of so-called parasocial relationships.
#10
Dean Martin wasn't quite a teatotaler, but pretty close to it. The whiskey he was always drinking on stage or on camera was usually apple juice.
Image credits: Kymera_7
#11
John Lennon. Horrible man, talks of love and peace. Like a lot of hippies really.
Image credits: anon
#12
Billy Idol. He sat in front of me at a Bryan Ferry concert (Formerly of Roxy Music) in San Diego and spent about 20 minutes graciously talking to fans after the show. Incredibly kind, funny and down to earth person. Complete gem of a human.
I ran into Jonathan BANKS at the Starbucks in Malibu. He played Mike Ehrmentraut on Breaking Bad and Better Call Saul. Very laid back and nice guy who chatted up a few teenage kids. Chill dude.
Image credits: waitwutok
Parasocial relationships are, at their core, one-sided. They happen when one person is completely unaware of the other’s existence. Meanwhile, the latter invests a lot of their time, energy, and effort in being involved in the former’s life.
These days, parasocial relationships form between fans and celebrities, bloggers, influencers, sports teams, gamers, and TV stars. In the past, it was TV personalities who were most often the ‘targets’ of these one-sided relationships. But these stars’ interactions with their fans were far more limited and formal back then. Fast-forward to the current date and you have an incredible array of tools to interact with your followers all over the world: from social media and live streams to blog posts and in-person meetups.
#13
Johnny Knoxville. I’ve met him, and he is way more soft-spoken and polite than you might guess… also just a stand-up guy in general, from the accounts of other folks I know (he was connected to my father’s work). Not a “Jacka*s” at all!
Image credits: ZoyaZhivago
#14
Angela from The Office is a silly goofball in real life.
Image credits: DampBr*tches
#15
I mean I don’t know her but I was sure in for a fun treat in Jennifer Coolidge’s AD article where it’s “surprise I live in a haunted Victorian home with thick dark curtains I have drawn all the time and these are my ghosts”
It was awesome. I was fully expecting Legally Blonde pinks and prep, not her in some moody robe pulling the drapes in melancholy before a seance.
Image credits: anon
Given all of this context, it’s not unusual to think that you ‘know’ a celebrity you follow as though they were a personal friend of yours. However, this is a misperception. Without sounding overly judgmental, you only get to know what they want you to know. It’s their public ‘face,’ similar to what you ‘put on’ when you go to work, meet with clients, attend fancy events, etc.
Getting to know a celebrity in person or watching some candid, in-depth, behind-the-scenes interviews can really change your relationship with them. Some fans might feel like they’ve finally ‘met’ the real, authentic star. Others might feel ‘betrayed’ that the person they’ve grown to admire for so long is only a small fragment of their personality.
#16
Sting is actually pretty funny and doesn’t take himself nearly as seriously as he seems to. Had an hour-long argument with him about alternative medicine years ago, he was a great sport.
Image credits: Porrick
#17
Ran into J.K. Simmons at a farmers market in LA. Super nice dude.
Image credits: Sweatyrando
#18
James Gandolfini was a Birkenstock wearing, Jerry listening hippie.
Image credits: mmmmmarty
Which celebrities do you avidly follow and why, dear Pandas? Which stars do you know for a fact are very different in private? Have you ever had the luck of getting to meet any of your heroes in person?
If you were a celebrity, how would you interact with your fans? How different are your own private and public personas? Let us know what you think in the comments!
#19
Pierce Brosnan is one whose public persona is such a convincing fiction that even he can’t convince people he’s not really James Bondish. An introspective, borderline shy family man, according to those who know him well.
Image credits: CatladyKeri
#20
Matt Berry. He's wacky, brash, loud and obnoxious on screen. In most interviews I've seen him in, he's very quiet and is serious when talking about his music especially. In group cast interviews, he always seems to be the quietest, mainly sitting back and letting the others handle the questions.
Image credits: Thomisawesome
#21
Nick Offerman smokes weed and is super chill and liberal. Pretty much the exact opposite of Ron Swanson. He does however have the woodworking and whiskey in common.
#22
Gilbert Gottfried was a really sweet and kind guy whose regular voice was nothing like his annoying performing voice. I overheard him reading a book to his son at bedtime and it was the sweetest thing.
Image credits: Holiday-Astronaut-60
#23
Eric Andre
My former venue was where he filmed his last netflix special. As wild and raunchy as his character and comedy his, once he was in business mode, he couldn't have been more professional, open-minded, and kind. It was truly incredible to see how well he can snap in and out of character.
One very memorable moment was when we had our initial meeting deciding if it would be at our venue or not, during sound checking he was discussing run of show, etc, someone hands him a mic to sound check and he goes from discussing business logistics with me to looking into my soul and says "Who here likes bukkake" and i obviously laughed and was caught off guard. He called me bukakke for the rest of the week.
During down time between audiences and filming I got to be around him a lot and he could not have been more friendly, and enjoyable.
10/10 would hang with him again any time.
Image credits: TheWhiteBobbyJindal
#24
Marky Mark was doing an interview at the height of his music career, leaning way back in his chair looking all gangsta, talking with his arms and hands, using what we used to call ebonics but I think has a different name now. The interview ends, he thinks the camera cuts but it’s still running, he drops the act, sits up straight, eyebrows go up, shakes hands and graciously goes into a thank you so much for having me spiel.
Image credits: SnoBunny1982
#25
Andy Samberg looks like the exact opposite of his roles during interviews, very professional.
Image credits: VonSpuntz
#26
Neil deGrasse Tyson is a pretty well established as a douchebag. Everyone I know that’s interacted with him in person hates his guts.
This is also the case and even more so for Bill Nye,.
Image credits: LobsterPunk
#27
Lady Gaga has a quite reserved personality and likes solitude. Not something you'd expect to hear about the meat dress girl from 13 years ago.
Image credits: coasterkyle18
#28
So I’m a housewife in Tx, don’t like rap music or keep up with it. My parents were on an elevator in San Antonio, when about 10 big guys in lots of gold jewelry and earrings and gold watches. So my dad wears a gold Pres Rolex. And this man kept staring and it made my dad nervous. As he got off, he told both parents, he loved their Rolex’s, and his name was Nellie, my dad said I like your …..gold. He said there was so much jewelry, he couldn’t think of to say. So my dad calls me and my husband, and says he was on an elevator with Nellie. I had no idea who Nellie was. I asked if she was nice. I loved her in Little House on the Prairie. My husband knew he was a rapper, my dad said oh good- now I don’t have to google him. My dad said he and his whole group were very nice.
Image credits: supermommy480
#29
When I was about 14, 1994. My parents and I went to MGM and some how my mother and I got lost and went through a staff only area we were desperate to find staff and help us get out. So all of a sudden a big group of people pushed by us. We were walking and looking at the crowd and then I saw this old man. I said mom omg! Did you see that man, he looks like Bob Hope. Bob Hope.. said” young lady, the reason I look like Bob Hope, is because I am Bob Hope” we were stunned, and then they walked by.
Image credits: supermommy480
#30
Justin Bieber has a home in my bestie's neighborhood. It's on a lake with no public access point other than a little walking trail.
He comes to the marina in a golf cart, plays cards with the people in the seasonal trailer park, and even celebrated my bestie's next-door neighbours 50th anniversary with them.
I've only seen Hailey a couple of times, and she was super quiet, walking a dog, buying a coffee at this little bakery shop near the quarry.
Image credits: mollymuppet78
#31
John Dunsworth. Played the most iconic drunk of our times in Mr. Lahey, but didn’t touch the stuff himself, and was incredibly caring and kind to everyone he met. May he rest in peace.
#32
Victoria Beckham is hilarious and seems like a cool person, she knows her posh reputation and plays around with it lol.
Image credits: Proof_Surround3856
#33
Nicole Kidman is not the cold heartless b***h the media makes her out to be.
She "recently" (5-10) years ago realized how bad her public image has been and is trying to correct it by slumming it on lower rated talk shows and doing those AMC commercials.
Image credits: IRMacGuyver
#34
I knew Joan Rivers somewhat and she was the sweetest, most lovely lady.
The mean and catty persona was a complete act.
#35
Maynard James Keenan. My son has stayed at his vineyard in Arizona with friends, and Maynard's "condescending, aloof a*****e" persona is an act. He's actually gracious and sweet to people he's comfortable with, and portrays the public-facing avatar through his media appearances. If he says "f**k you" to you, you're supposed to say "f**k you, too!", and then you both laugh.
Image credits: Anishinaapunk
#36
Kind of dated but Art Garfunkle.
His stage persona has always been a cool, intelligent, sensitive and hip dude who's wise about the world, but in reality he's an aging, grumpy, insecure closeted bisexual.
His signature afro has also been a wig for years.
#37
Jeff Goldblum owns a box at the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and is an avid collector of Nascar memorabilia. He can often be seen crushing a case of Keystone Lite during the Indy 500.
#38
The lead singer for anti-flag. Not a mainstream celebrity, but well known in punk circles.
Their music is very pro human rights, and it turns out he r*pes teenage girls.
Image credits: walmartballer
#39
Obviously not a living celebrity but I heard that Lucille Ball had a very dry sense of humor when off set. It was all business and no nonsense.
#40
Daniel Tosh has severe social anxiety and basically plays a character when he performs.
Image credits: Youngandidiotic
#41
Garrison Keillor. His stage persona is of a gentle, calm grandfatherly type, but behind the scenes he's been said to be a diva and a jerk (and that was before the #MeToo allegations).
#42
Johnny Carson was a classic introvert, but you wouldn’t know that from watching his show.
#43
Mike Myers (aka Austin Powers) has a legendary reputation for being a douche.
Image credits: JoJCeeC88
#44
I've posted this before, but Zach Braff is one the biggest a holes my best friend ever worked with in the industry. He's been an actor for 30 years and worked with some legendary people, yet he singled out him.
#45
Rachael Ray is so nice, sweet and bubbly on 30 Minute Meals and her other TV shows, but I heard in real life that she is super nasty to fans and people in general.
A shame, really. I used to have a crush on her, and it broke my heart to learn that she wasn't the nice person she portrays on TV.
#46
Nathan Fielder - He tries to come across as 'stiff ' or a bit socially awkward in a lot of his character work over the years
He's come out of his shell quite a bit in recent weeks on talk shows and the like. Jimmy Kimmel actually ended up describing him as "one of the loosest guys he knows".
#47
Well I didn’t actually meet Brandy, (the singer), but she and her family went to one of Cal State Northridge’s college graduation ceremony and she was casually walking around with no security or armed men. She literally just came through the crowds and walked around/spoke to people as if she were one of the college kids herself. She just looked down to earth and chill.
#48
Most YouTubers (if you want to count them as “celebrities”.) They often caricaturize their own personalities on-camera so much that it’s pretty jarring to hear them speak casually on podcasts and stuff.
#49
People who know Howard Stern have said he's really quiet and thoughtful when he's off the air. His persona has changed a lot since the early/mid-90's when he first became famous, but I think if you would have told anyone back then that this brash, sexist shock jock was the complete opposite off the air, no one would have believed you.
#50
I’d say as a rule of thumb, people with really nice personas tend to actually suck while people who are OK with being perceived as d***s are generally pretty cool. That said, Larry David is the absolute same person as his character.
