One boyfriend’s decision to leave his girlfriend behind to go on a solo trip for his 40th birthday was met with overwhelming support online.
Taking to Reddit’s popular confession forum, Am I The A**hole, the 39-year-old admitted that his main reason for ditching his girlfriend to travel alone was because she couldn’t afford to come.
He explained that he and his 33-year-old partner only started dating three months ago. Meanwhile, his desire to take an extended break from work, for himself, has been brewing for some time.
“Next year I turn 40. And I’ve never taken an actual vacation. I’ve extended work trips to do something fun where I am. I’ve traveled to visit friends or family. Always just for a long weekend (never more than 3 days total),” he wrote.
The Redditor said that he wanted to take a week-long trip “for recreational purposes” to celebrate his forthcoming birthday, and wanted the trip to be an international seven-day affair. Considering he has saved his money since his early twenties, the plan is more than doable for him but not for his girlfriend.
The Reddit user admitted: “She doesn’t make as much money and, most importantly, is currently saddled with around $20k in credit card debt arising from a period of unexpected unemployment she had in the past that forced her to burn through savings and live on credit cards.”
Still, he decided to tell her he planned to go away. Immediately, the Redditor’s girlfriend asked if she could tag along but offered up the idea of going to Las Vegas instead of traveling to another country. Her financial situation made her weary of going on such a big trip.
“I told her I’d be willing to cover our lodging and, depending on where we go, help her pay for airfare,” the boyfriend admitted. However, he had no interest in covering the total cost of the trip for himself and her.
Yet, his generous offer was not enough for her considering her mountain of debt. Even if they traveled domestically, she wouldn’t be able to pay for half the plane ticket or meals.
The Reddit writer confessed: “I said that I understood but I also have been wanting to do this milestone birthday thing for a while now and I still intend to go even if just by myself and would only be gone a week.
“She became upset that I would travel without her and it caused a bit of a fight.”
His friends and family are divided over the situation. Some people in his life have argued that he should take this trip for himself, “with or without her.”
“On the other, some are saying it is cruel of me to be planning a vacation in front of a person who is trying to pay off large amounts of debt anyway,” he noted.
Fellow Redditors think he’s justified in leaving his girlfriend behind.
“You’ve got too much of your own life to let yourself be held back by someone you’re barely invested in. She can either get over her fomo or you can find a new partner who is supportive,” one reader commented.
Another wrote: “Asking to go is fine. But the moment it was clear that your plans were unaffordable, the only acceptable next step is her telling you how thrilled she is that you get to take this trip.”
“You’ve been with her for only 3 MONTHS so far and she’s already sulking for you not footing the entire bill for a trip for YOUR milestone birthday NEXT YEAR?” another Reddit user added.
