WHAT would you do if you were the First Minister of Scotland for a day? Do you think you could oversee changes which would benefit the population of the country? Do you reckon you could make a better fist of it than our elected representatives currently are given half a chance?
Like most people, you correspondent has asked himself the hypothetical question on occasion as he has despaired at the bungling ineptitude of MSPs. Could he build a ferry with windows and ensure that male rapists aren’t locked up in female prisons? It seems like common sense.
But the very first thing he would do if he suddenly ascended to power would be to ban stadium announcers at football matches. A meaningless gesture? Don’t you believe it. This seemingly trivial act would improve the lives of countless thousands.
Unbelievably verbose, extremely loud, intensely irritating and completely pointless, these awful people have long been a major bugbear of mine. How does giving some tiresome blowhard a microphone to babble into incoherently before a game possibly enhance the atmosphere during the build-up to kick-off? They should be outlawed. Forever.
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My long-held view that announcers contribute absolutely nothing to the match day experience and can actually detract from a big occasion were confirmed on Thursday evening when I had the considerable good fortune to attend the second leg of the Coppa Italia semi-final between Bologna and Empoli in the rather magnificent Stadio Renato Dall’Ara.
The entertainment before the Serie A rivals did battle was provided by a house music DJ who was situated with his decks and mixing board in amongst the fans in the stands. The ground was bouncing, absolutely bouncing, long before the two teams emerged from the tunnel. If I had known we were going to be treated to hours of thumping techno beats I would have taken some glow sticks, a whistle and a boiler suit with me. It was totally awesome.
There was a brief moment of sombre reflection before the action commenced as the crowd remembered “Il Papa” – Pope Francis.
There was a lusty round of applause and then a syrupy European power ballad was played over the public address system as pictures of the big man, God rest his soul, were flashed up on the giant screens. I have no idea what sentiments were being expressed in the song. However, I do know one thing for certain. It was emotional.
Bologna, who Scotland internationalist Lewis Ferguson has played for since 2022 and captained since 2023, are by no means the biggest or best-known club in Italy. But my goodness they know how to throw a party. It was eye-opening to see how they created a fun, joyous, uplifting evening which everyone, bar the Empoli supporters, was happy to get involved in regardless of their age.
The festivities didn’t stop when the full-time whistle blew either. Reaching the Coppa Italia final was a very big deal indeed for the Red and Blues and they milked the moment. There was a podium with another DJ on it outside the stadium and jubilant fans danced to the upbeat rave tunes he spun, hugged each other, cheered and chanted as they dispersed into the night.
The environment generated at the Bologna v Empoli match was clearly the consequence of some serious joined-up thinking, of a collaborative approach being taken, of club custodians asking their paying customers what they would like to see happen and then delivering on their desires. You fancy having the Bolognese Ewan McVicar out there on the terraces with you? Not a problem.
A fair few clubs in Scotland do supporter engagement well. Rangers chief executive Patrick Stewart and several members of his senior management team held a fans’ forum at New Edmiston House just this week. Those in attendance answered questions on a variety of topics. Most chairman, club owners and directors across the country interact with their followers in a very similar fashion.
But there remains, rightly or wrongly, the distinct impression that it is all a little tokenistic, that those who invest in clubs and are involved in the running of the sport in Scotland are keen to keep punters at a safe distance, that the SFA and SPFL hierarchies are extremely wary of giving the man in the street any real power.
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Ian Maxwell, the SFA chief executive, was grilled by MSPs at Holyrood about the lack of sway that supporters hold back in 2023. “Fan involvement is absolutely key in football,” he said. “But we need to be careful as well because fans are very emotional. They are fanatics by definition and make emotional decisions.”
He has a point to a degree. There are some complex and delicate issues which would not be enhanced whatsoever by having the input of the Green Brigade or the Union Bears. But is there currently enough dialogue? There is not. Could those who file through the turnstiles on a Saturday be consulted more than is currently the case? They certainly could.
It was depressing to hear PFA Scotland chief executive Fraser Wishart bemoan the absence of any kind of meaningful relationship with outside bodies this week. “When it comes down to the overall governance of the game, the clubs don’t want us in the door, don’t want coaches and managers in the door, don’t want supporters in the door,” he said. “But it’s not good governance if you’ve not got different voices at the table.”
Nobody would be particularly interested in becoming the next John Swinney. But Scottish supporters would certainly appreciate being listened to more than they are at the moment. If they were it would be cause to celebrate like Bologna fans in the Stadio Renato Dall’Ara on match day.
