The hat-trick hero of the Black Ferns’ 2017 World Cup win, Toka Natua is back in rugby – discovering the pros and cons of playing as a mum. And the double international is ready for her next chapter in France.
There are the odd moments at training where Toka Natua’s mind goes blank and she finds herself on the edge of bursting into tears, in front of her Blues team-mates.
It’s in those flashes Natua misses her baby, Lavenia-Rangi, most. When she remembers her 18-month-old daughter is 2000km away and she won’t be seeing her for a little while.
But it’s the tough decision the new Blues prop and her partner, Chiefs loose forward Pita Gus Sowakula, made so they could both play Super Rugby this season.
Lavenia-Rangi is being well taken care of by Sowakula’s mum and his large family back home in Fiji, since Natua started training with the Blues women in mid-January.
“It’s been a challenge trying to deal with my emotions,” Natua, 31, admits. “Baby's my everything.”
But the 22-test Black Fern – legendary for scoring a hat-trick of tries in the 2017 Rugby World Cup final – knows it was the best solution as she returned to rugby for the first time since 2020, making her Super Rugby Aupiki debut.
“At first, I was adamant she wasn’t going,” Natua says. “But in the last week before going into Blues training camp, I realised she’d have to go because I didn’t know how I was going to focus, how I could cope.”
Natua’s mum offered to help, too, but she lives an hour’s drive away in Tokoroa, where Natua – who’s Cook Island Māori - grew up. “Mum’s an early childhood education teacher and both my sisters have five children each. So it's already full-on for her,” Natua laughs.
Lavenia-Rangi's parents are counting down the “two more Saturdays” until she returns home to Hamilton – after the Blues' play off for third in the final weekend of Super Rugby Aupiki, playing Hurricanes Poua at Waikato Stadium on Saturday.
Returning to rugby as a mother has certainly been an eye-opener for Natua.
“When I was younger, I took things for granted. But being a mum now, you appreciate that time you have away,” the loosehead prop says. “I’ve found a whole different purpose. Although you’re more exhausted, I find it much more enjoyable. And that’s been my main focus this season.
“Like a lot of mums I’ve spoken to in the game, I wouldn’t change it for the world.”
It’s not the first time sport has separated Natua and her daughter. She went to England last October – switching codes to play in the Rugby League World Cup for the Cook Islands.
“It was my first break away from Baby, and it was for three weeks. But I also enjoyed that time away to focus on myself,” she says.
Natua played for the Cook Islands at the 2017 League World Cup, too – three months after winning the Rugby World Cup in Belfast. This time turned out to be a lot more painful.
In the opening game against world champions, Australia, Natua suffered a fractured eye socket. “Fortunately it didn’t need surgery; it healed over time,” she says. “I was pretty much a team manager after that.” After losing to the Kiwi Ferns, the Cook Islands scored their sole victory of the tournament against France.
Natua has enjoyed interchanging between the two codes. “It keeps me learning. I feel like both games help each other - the way you run lines, the tackle contact. I just wish I’d had more time to prepare for the Rugby League World Cup,” she says.
But she’s unsure whether she will play league again. “In all honesty, after this season, I will plan my next around my daughter. I don’t want to waste any more time away from her,” she says.
Toka Natua and Pita Gus Sowakula in their rival Super Rugby kits
Natua is guaranteed at least one more season of rugby – when she, Sowakula and their daughter move to France in October to play rugby for the Clermont club.
Sowakula, who’s played two tests for the All Blacks and was powerful with the ball in the Chiefs' victory over the Rebels on the weekend, was the first player signed to Clermont in their bid to win the European rugby’s Champions Cup title by 2025. As part of the deal, Natua was also signed up to play in the Clermont women’s club side.
“Everyone keeps saying ‘You must be excited’. But I’m nervous, especially about missing my family. I’m a mum’s girl, and I’m really close to my sisters and their children,” she says.
“I know with me and my partner we can have fun anywhere, so it will be a good experience for our little family.”
Natua admits she was anxious before her return to rugby with the Blues this season.
“There’s that old Auckland-Waikato rivalry that’s been there like, forever,” says Natua, who helped Waikato reach the Farah Palmer Cup final against champions Canterbury in 2020.
“The older girls I knew, but there were more younger than older. But when I came in, I stoked there were a lot more people like me, Pacific Island girls. I’m really enjoying the environment – it’s refreshing.
“Being in a professional environment – that’s in between the Black Ferns and FPC – means it’s not too serious that you can’t enjoy it. And we can get creative. Having Carlos Spencer, the creative mastermind, working with us has been awesome.”
Blues training has been intense, so she’s put her other career – as a freelance graphics designer – on hold. (Natua has a bachelor of media and creative studies from the University of Waikato).
On the bench for the Blues’ narrow 26-23 semifinal loss to Matatū on Sunday, Natua admits it’s been a challenge to getting to her ideal playing weight. "I'd like to be in better shape before I commit to the FPC this season," she says.
Watching the Black Ferns win the Rugby World Cup at home last November was bittersweet for Natua. It brought back good memories of the last World Cup – where she appeared in every game, and scored three tries in the space of 20 minutes in the Black Ferns’ triumphant final against England.
“But in all honesty, I found it hard watching because it was a goal for me to play in a World Cup at home,” she says.
A string of circumstances had determined otherwise - a hamstring injury ruled her out of the 2018 Black Ferns campaign, then Covid hit, and she fell pregnant.
“The 2017 Black Ferns were the team who got things moving more for the women’s game. So I found it hard because it was a place where I wanted to be, the reward I wanted to reap,” she says.
“Of course, I was happy to see some of my closest friends win again. But I watched more highlights than live games.”
Natua reckons time will be against her to play at another World Cup, in England in 2025. But she’s relished her first Aupiki season with the Blues – even if it’s been the cause of a little rivalry at home with Sowakula, who she met when he first played for the Chiefs in 2017.
“My partner tells me not to wear my Blues stuff around him and his team,” Natua laughs. “Even my family cheer for me, not necessarily for the Blues. But I guess I’m still Chiefs at heart.”
So you wouldn't blame her if she was cheering under her breath for the defending champions, Chiefs Manawa, when they play Matatū in the Super Rugby Aupiki final on Saturday.
