Once upon a time, William Shakespeare asked, “What’s in a name?” And while all is fair in the fictional world, the real world spins differently, doesn’t it? What Willy doesn’t know is that conflicts can arise within families based on one name. Because we often hear a family member stealing someone else’s favorite name.
And that’s exactly what happened with this Redditor! She had always dreamed of naming her future daughter ‘Scarlett’ when she became a parent, but then her elder brother stole it for his own kid. Upset by it, she confronted him, but he downplayed her emotions.
More info: Reddit
Teenage poster has an elder brother who is in his 30s as her mom had him when she was 16 years of age
Image credits: Askar Abayev (not the actual photo)
The poster has loved the name Scarlett ever since she was little and she wanted to use it for her future daughter and the whole family was aware about this
Image credits: u/AcademicPop7165
Image credits: Arina Krasnikova (not the actual photo)
However, when her brother had a baby, he named her Scarlett and the poster was very upset by this, when she confronted her brother, he was rude and dismissed her
Image credits: u/AcademicPop7165
Image credits: MART PRODUCTION (not the actual photo)
When she asked for advice online, she told the Redditors that she had excused herself and calmly left the room after she found out about the name
Image credits: u/AcademicPop7165
She also said that it was not common for cousins to share the same name in her family and Scarlett was also not a common name there
In this story, Reddit user AcademicPop7165 narrated how her favorite name for her future baby got stolen. She’s a teen and her elder brother’s in his 30s. Her mom had him when she was 16, hence the age gap. She explained that she had always adored the name ‘Scarlett’ and ever since she was little she wanted to give that name to her future daughter. And everyone in her family knew as any time some baby-related topic popped up, she always told them about it.
One day, her sister-in-law delivered a baby and the happy couple were blessed with a healthy girl. But then, the original poster (OP) found out that they had named the baby ‘Scarlett’. It must’ve been really upsetting for her. Imagine dreaming about something ever since you were a kid and then watching someone else take away your dream. Hurts, right? Even the poster must’ve been hurt considering that the whole family knew it was her favorite name.
And although she was quite irked by her brother, she didn’t make a big deal out of it, rather, she just excused herself and calmly left the room. She mentioned that Scarlett was not a family name and her brother had never admitted even liking the name. In fact, he had once said that he wasn’t a fan of the name. So, pretty annoying that he went and stole the name that he didn’t even like, right?
Then the poster went and confronted him about it, to which, he completely downplayed her feelings with phrases like, “stop over-reacting”, “get over it”, and even “you don’t own the name”. OP expressed that she understood the fact that the name didn’t belong to her. But just because she’s a teenager, while he’s an adult, it doesn’t mean that she can’t have future plans, or rather get those plans stolen.
When she went online and asked Redditors if she was in the wrong, many of them said that it was common for cousins to share the same name. However, she clarified that this is not the case within her family and Scarlett is not even a common name where she lives.
Image credits: Heiner (not the actual photo)
Most peeps online agreed that she was not in the wrong, but it was her brother’s fault. They even called him out for downplaying and dismissing her emotions. According to Psych Central, “Emotional invalidation is when a person’s thoughts, feelings, emotions, and behaviors are rejected, judged, or ignored. It can affect anyone at any age, and whether you’re a child or adult, emotional invalidation can be upsetting and painful.” So, the Redditors seem to be right.
And psychologist, Dr. Jamie Long, says, “Some individuals knowingly invalidate others as a form of manipulation and control as they might not understand or value the importance of emotional validation.” It looks like her brother might not understand the significance of how it would affect her when he downplayed her emotions. Seems like she was right in getting upset and leaving the room as the Redditors pointed out.
Many folks came up with a hilarious solution. They said that she should get a pet and name it Scarlett. That would really irritate her brother and sister-in-law. Some even said that they had actually done this when they were stuck in a similar situation and it did really frustrate the person who stole their favorite name.
Others suggested that if she has a daughter in the future, she could name her Scarlett. And, if she hears anything from her brother, she can be just as rude to him as he was to her, using the same blunt phrases like “get over it” and “you don’t own the name”. They felt that there was absolutely no harm in giving a similar name to cousins.
People also applauded her for the way she handled the situation by making a calm exit even when she was distressed. BetterHelp has said that if a family conflict arises, it’s better to stay calm. And that’s exactly what she did. Redditors said that the teen poster handled the situation better than even some adults would have.
According to them, the brother did this to her as she is just a teen and if she was older, he might not have. They pointed out the problem of teens not being taken seriously by adults. As per the United States Census Bureau, approximately 13% of the US population are teenagers. And as the Redditors highlighted, teens need to be taken seriously, too.
Now, before we jump to see the Redditor’s reactions, how about you let us know your thoughts on the matter? Feel free to post them in the comments!
Redditors applauded her for reacting calmly and called out her brother for being rude and dismissing her emotions
