Concerts, plays, and even movie theaters have a certain etiquette. It mostly boils down to not being rude and not ruining the experience for other people. This mother, however, decided to ruin this kindergarten play for children and parents alike.
Her husband recently went online and shared the story of how she talked throughout the kids’ entire play. Having had enough, the dad then left the play before it ended, angering his wife even more. But he wanted to check with other netizens whether he was the bad guy in this situation.
A mother irritated her husband and other parents by talking throughout her son’s kindergarten play
Image credits: ashishk75 / Envato (not the actual photo)
Fed up and embarrassed by his wife’s behavior, the dad walked out of the play before it ended
Image credits: Image-Source / Envato (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Beginning_Pizza2196
Disrespect has no place in a loving relationship
It’s no secret that to have a happy marriage, you have to put a lot of work into it. With the current divorce rates climbing higher and higher, few people seem to be willing to do the hard part. According to the APA estimations, 41% of first marriages might end in divorce.
The author of this story writes how his wife regularly puts him down in front of other people. “She’ll often become aggressive, short-tempered, and will be incredibly rude towards me,” the Redditor wrote in his post. “I think she does it performatively because she thinks it makes her look cool.”
Disrespect in marriage is one reason why partners may drift apart. And it’s often not as simple as acting rude. Leadership coach Anne Duvaux writes that disrespect can manifest in one partner in the relationship feeling unappreciated and undervalued.
Disrespect can take the form of interrupting, belittling, and guilt-tripping a partner. It can take away trust between partners and cause resentment – in more serious cases, even abuse. “Disrespect, left unchecked, can become a toxic cycle, harming both partners and the fabric of the relationship,” Duvaux writes.
Experts say that passive-aggressiveness comes from insecurities and feeling powerless or inadequate. “Your spouse might display a victim mentality and operate out of a deep sense of insecurity,” Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott write. “Which helps them justify their devious methods of getting what they want. You might even notice that your spouse knocks you down in order to elevate themselves.”
Anne Duvaux claims that you need to clearly communicate to your partner that you’re feeling disrespected. Some people might not be aware they’re being disrespectful. Others, however, might thrive on making other people feel small. “Don’t be afraid to stand up for yourself,” Duvaux writes.
People can navigate living with a person who has narcissistic traits
Image credits: gpointstudio / Freepik (not the actual photo)
Many people in the comments called out the wife’s narcissistic and attention-seeking behavior. While many jumped to suggestions of separation and divorce, it’s possible to live with a person exhibiting narcissistic behaviors.
Dr. Ramani Durvasula, an author of several books about living with a narcissist, says that establishing clear boundaries is the first step. A person might say: “I will not be spoken to this way,” and if the spouse violates that boundary, just leave the room.
Removing yourself from the situation is also the right strategy during emotional outbursts. When the narcissistic spouse starts hurling hurtful insults, their partner doesn’t have to listen to it. “You are not a psychological punching bag,” Durvasula explains. “It is their responsibility to learn to regulate, and you are not their therapist. It’s not your responsibility to teach them.”
However, sometimes enough is enough. Mark Ettensohn, PsyD, the author of “Unmasking Narcissism: A Guide to Understanding the Narcissist in Your Life, recommends leaving at the first signs of violence, be it emotional, verbal, or physical.
“Or if you feel strongly in your gut that the relationship is unhealthy and is likely to stay that way,” Ettenshohn says. This includes being isolated from friends and family, doubting your self-worth, being scared of your partner, not enjoying spending time with them, and feeling guilty when expressing your feelings and needs.
People called out the wife’s behavior as borderline abusive
Many netizens didn’t think the dad was the bad guy here, but questioned why he married such a woman
Others pointed out that the victim here was the son and how harmful an example the dad is setting by taking his wife’s abuse
