The abuse and hate messages I received for doing a TikTok dance live on the BBC after Wales’s defeat by England was crazy. On Instagram I received a few DMs saying: “You’re an embarrassment, what do you think you’re doing?”
That doesn’t affect me because we get criticism all the time for different things: losing a game, dropping a high ball. I am not hugely active on X and it was not until those of my friends who aren’t big fans of rugby were checking in on me to see if I was OK that I realised the extent of the abuse on social media.
It was bizarre – how did it get that far? I just did a TikTok video. After the game I might be smiling. I am happy and engaging with fans, but that does not mean I am happy inside. When people say: “She shouldn’t have acted like that”, how should I have reacted? Should I be sad, crying and go straight in and be angry?
I understand we lost and the men wouldn’t do it, but it’s a different brand and ballgame to what the men do. I don’t regret doing it at all. The support myself and Sarah Bern have had off the back of it has shown it is a different game.
Receiving abuse isn’t new to me, the other Wales girls or players across the sport. I even got shouted at while playing for my club, Bristol Bears, in the Premiership Women’s Rugby semi-final against Gloucester-Hartpury last month. A supporter in the stand said: “Go back to grassroots sport.”
That’s not acceptable. If you believe that then why have you come to watch?
I don’t experience it every game, but all of us do receive negative comments and for different reasons. We get comments like “She can’t tackle” or “Oh God, she looks big” or“What has she done with her hair?”
At the Rugby World Cup three years ago I was getting comments like: “Jaz can’t tackle.” I significantly reduced the time I spend on X at that point because didn’t need to see it. The negatives were outweighing the positives.
I spoke to my wife, Alisha, about coming off social media completely, but I get sponsors from it. If it wasn’t helping my work I would come off it. I don’t think it has any positive relevance to my life.
The TikTok abuse has been a footnote to my Six Nations and I have been fully focused on the tournament, which Wales have been navigating with our new head coach, Sean Lynn. While we haven’t recorded a win, performances have been improving and that is in part thanks to the culture and environment Lynny has created. It’s an open and safe place to be and everyone is enjoying it.
I have no bad words to say about Lynny – he is brilliant and well-respected among the group. He has done a lot for Gloucester-Hartpury, his rugby CV is really good. I was asked the other day to sum him up in one word and I said “engaging”. When he is speaking people are listening. He is hilarious, but he also has a stern side that has come out sometimes in training, but only in understandable moments.
We have seen a lot of change. Everyone is enjoying it a lot more. No one is anxious going into training or anxious because you’re going to get pulled up over doing something silly.
So off the pitch has been amazing. On the pitch it has been a bit tricky as Lynny’s first full day came just before our first Six Nations game and there was not much he could put in place. He hasn’t changed anything drastically, but he has started to drip bits and bobs in throughout the weeks and we are definitely getting better on pitch in defence and attack. The more Sean can be in and around training, the more he can change and adapt and tailor drills to suit each player, the better Wales are going to get.
Ireland are next up on Sunday and we need to make sure we put them under stress and take them to dark places in their performance. They played well against England last time out and one key aspect for us will be nullifying the fly‑half, Dannah O’Brien.
She is amazing. When I watch her play I’m puzzled by how she has so much time on the ball. She also kicks huge distances and as a full-back I keep thinking: “How do I even defend that?” She definitely makes me nervous, especially in the backfield. She absolutely runs their game, is the soul of Ireland’s attack and can put some shots in as well. We’ve also got great kickers and so hopefully we can isolate her.
Lynny’s message has been to be excited for the game against Ireland and our final game against Italy and he believes we can produce good performances. Wales are definitely capable of coming away with a win in this tournament.
• Jaz Joyce-Butchers has played 42 times for Wales and has competed in three Olympics in rugby sevens for Team GB
