To the badlands of 1990s boyband wars next, and a reminder that some blood feuds die harder than an AutoTuned vibrato.
Our narrator – reliable or otherwise – is 25-year-old Aaron Carter, brother of erstwhile Backstreet Boy Nick Carter, and a teen act in his own right who is somehow still managing to tour. Last weekend, his musical perorations saw him pitch up in Boston, and it was here, apparently, that he was set upon by hoods loyal to sometime Backstreet rivals – and Boston locals – New Kids on the Block.
Having posted some snaps of his black eye and scuffed knuckles, Aaron explained that he had been jumped as he left a restaurant. According to our hero, a man had shouted: "I heard you're doing a show here tomorrow. This is the town of the New Kids." (They all talk like that, FYI.)
Upon those words, three other guys leapt from a Chevy Malibu – yes, sharp-eyed Aaron got the marque – and set upon him. Well, they picked the wrong new-jack badass. "I'm a 6th degree black belt in Muay Thai," explained Aaron on Twitter. "They lost."
I'm a 6th degree black belt in Muay Thai.. They lost
— Aaron Carter (@AARONCARTER) June 23, 2013
Or as Aaron's big brother Nick subsequently put it to a radio station: "It's just a little strange the way the whole situation went down. But you know, it's my brother, he's young. I was young one time."
"He's not a black belt in anything," revealed Nick, who is clearly a 10th dan in filial undermining. "Dancing, maybe. Dance fighting."
As for the Chevy Malibu Four, their whereabouts are currently unknown, with Boston police remaining tight-lipped on any leads they may be following up. However, the suspicion has to be that the incident could spark reprisal attacks on any New Kid siblings who stray on to rival turf. Until further notice, therefore, Marky Mark Walhberg is warned to stay away from Orlando, Florida – or "the town of the Backstreets", in the argot of such things.
