The trick, we soon saw, was not to get between a pig and its food. A pig may well look distracted by other things lurking in the muddy hay, but when it hears some feed jiggling inside a bucket, it really gains focus. If our family’s pig farming taster session at Smallicombe Farm was to teach us nothing else, it was that you stand clear and ensure a stable footing when a pink snout is moving your way.
In a quiet fold of a valley between Honiton in east Devon and Lyme Regis on the edge of Dorset, Smallicombe is run by Ian Todd, a former lawyer who some years ago swapped legal work for the mud of a rural idyll, and his wife Maggie. I’d come for a weekend farmstay with my husband Martin and our sons, Felix, 12, and Victor, 9, to try out its new half-day “piggy experience” (suitable for anyone considering a career move or just wanting to learn more about our curly-tailed friends).
The farm has neat self-catering units down one side of a central courtyard and, on the other side, adjacent to the main farmhouse, a spacious bed and breakfast suite – brilliantly fitted out with a separate bunkroom for children – where we stayed.
After a Devon breakfast cooked by Ian’s daughter, we headed to the pigsty where a rare British lop sow, pale and about the size of a one-man tent, was dozing on her side. First, Farmer Todd told us to mix pig feed with water to make a moist meal for those mothers still in charge of piglets. Dry food was then emptied into another bucket for us to tip out – the warning to move aside quickly was essential: a hungry pig can push over an unwary human, and plywood panels, or pig boards, were handed out to protect our knees from a barge-by. Pretty soon we were all smiling and swinging buckets and sty gates as if born to the life. A litter of piglets had been kept aside for us to see and the best moment was when all seven leapt up to a fence together on their hind legs to watch us approach.
The lop, we learned, is Britain’s rarest breed. The nine breeding sows, three boars and three fattening pigs kept at Smallicombe are part of a population of only 300 or 400 in the country. The other adult pigs on the farm are mostly Berkshires, although there is a saddleback too, with its distinctive patches. Smallicombe pigs have won prizes at county shows: height of trotter heel matters, apparently, as do strong haunches, which indicate a sow will be a good breeder.
As a finale before lunch, we had to demonstrate what we had learned about the porcine mind and move two pigs, unaided, from a swampy pen at the top of a field down into a covered sty. It was a comedy set-up and my family duly delivered. By the end we were running around like swineherds on scrumpy. I would say we were sweating like pigs, but apparently pigs don’t sweat, despite their reputation. They are very good, however, at finding gaps in fences. As my elder son tried to block an escape route, one porker jumped a foot in the air to get over the other. “So pigs can fly, given half a chance,” he said.
Even if you’re not here to learn about pigs, the farm is a lovely place to stay – it also has hens, 12 head of beguiling ruby Devon cattle and during our visit were busily lambing 50 Dorset Down ewes. There’s a small playground for younger children and the large trampoline set into a lawn captivated my sons while I read a book and gazed at the gentle roll of the hills. It’s a good base for exploring the area, too. We ate in Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall’s River Cottage Canteen in Axminster (Farmer Todd’s hand, we were told, features in HFW’s Meat Book) and went to the beach, taking the dramatic coastal path from Beer to Branscombe.
But when we finally drove away from Smallicombe it was the sound of the large sow snoring in the evenings that we took away with us. It was unnervingly human.
• The trip was provided by Smallicombe Farm. A family room costs from £105 a night B&B. A family piggy experience (farmstay.co.uk) costs from £95 for four
MORE STAYS ON UK FARMS
Glamping, various
Feather Down has luxury lodge tents and log cabins on 33 working farms in the UK. New to the collection this year are Cwmberach Uchaf, a mountain farm in the Brecon Beacons; Treganhoe, a dairy farm in Cornwall; Wambrook, a mixed organic farm in Somerset; and Coach House, a sheep farm in the same county (the last has a log cabin rather than canvas).
• Two nights from £199, sleep six, featherdown.co.uk
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The river Annan, full of salmon and trout, runs though Kirkwood, a working cattle and sheep farm east of Dumfries, and autumn is the best time to fish. The farm also runs learning holidays, including a three-day mushroom school with professional mycologists. There is a five-star farmhouse, or several simpler cottages.
• From £280 a week self-catering, three-day course £690, kirkwood-lockerbie.co.uk
Hop-picking in Kent, apple-pressing in Worcestershire or pumpkin-carving in East Sussex
These three autumn escapes from of Farmstay UK aim to celebrate seasonal food. Other options include foraging in Cornwall, making wild cocktails in Dorset and blackberry-picking in Warwickshire. Accommodation ranges from farmhouses and cottages to converted barns and shepherds huts.
• Two nights B&B from £160 for two, farmstay.co.uk/harvest
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Hemscott Hill is a family farm next to a seven-mile sandy beach at Druridge Bay. In summer, guests can wild camp on the dunes, or hire a bell tent or shepherd’s hut. There is a cottage and bunk barn for colder months. The farm’s friendly herd of alpacas can be taken for walks.
• One-hour alpaca walk from £22.50 for two, camping from £5pp, barn £25pp, glamping £40pp, cottage for six from £400 a week, tractorsandtents.com
