My wife and I have been living in a seniors community living facility for over four years. In this period, a large number of our contacts, elders as well as their children, have been asking with concern, “Why have you moved to an old-age home?”, followed by another query with curiosity, “Are you happy there?”
Such interactions prompted me to share our experience and insights. First and most important, seniors community living and old-age homes are different. In fact, they are worlds apart.
While the SCLs are run as business enterprises, with infrastructure and amenities ranging from comfortable to luxurious, meant for those who are well off, the OAHs are run by governments or NGOs, offering basic amenities free to the destitute.
Most who live in the SCLs, including my wife and I, have chosen to live here, whereas in the other case, they have been compelled to.
Then comes the next question, “Why move to an SCL home?”
The foremost reason is the migration of children to foreign shores, and reluctance of elderly parents to relocate and live in an alien land and culture. What about safety, security and support during medical emergencies when elders choose to live alone? This is the situation where the SCLs comes into picture.
Besides, the SCLs enhance the quality of life in other parameters too — freedom from kitchen work as food is cooked in a community kitchen; assured services of domestic aid; plenty of opportunities to socialise and pursue hobbies; many avenues for entertainment.
Do the above observations validate the claim made in the brochures of the SCLs that they provide heaven on earth for all seniors? No. Certainly not.
There are some, after moving and living in SCL, who rue and complain about being away from children and grandchildren. A few others are unable to cope with relocating from their homes of many decades to live among strangers, akin to uprooting a banyan tree. To come back to the frequently asked question to us, “Are you happy in SCL?” Our answer is, “Yes, definitely”. So why are some unhappy? I would like to share my insight by emending a Charles Darwin quote: “It is neither the most educated nor the wealthiest who lead happy lives but those who are able to adapt to changes around them.”
soraiyurvraman@gmail.com
