As the year begins and many Australians attempt to start off on a positive note, the Australian Reptile Park has announced it has a new record-holding beast of a funnel-web spider to fuel our nightmares. So much for that positive start to the year, see you in 2026.
In a piece of Eldritch horror come to life, a funnel-web has been donated to the wildlife sanctuary that is believed to be the largest male specimen ever recorded.
Measuring a legs-pan of a whopping 9.2cm from foot-to-foot, this beast is so big it reminded the park’s spider keepers of another large Australian creature: the Hemsworth.
“This spider was just so big in comparison to his peers it reminded me of Chris Hemsworth and his brothers, and how they tower over the average person,” said spider keeper Emma Teni.
@australianreptilepark Move over Hercules… Hemsworth is the new biggest kid in town! 😎 #funnelweb #sydneyfunnelweb #funnelwebspider #aussieanimals #spiders #australianreptilepark ♬ original sound – AustReptilePark
Fascinatingly, this time last year another funnel-web was found that broke the record for largest male in the park. However, the new Hemsworth spider completely dwarfs him by a whole centimeter.
“We thought for sure he had to be a female because of his size, but upon closer inspection, he’s a boy,” said Emma.
“This means Hemsworth is going to be able to join our lifesaving anti-venom program, we can only milk the male funnel web spiders because of the presence of the atracotoxin in their venom.”
Emma went on to explain how donating funnel-webs can be a safe thing to do, is easily accessible in many parts of New South Wales, and does far more good than killing the arachnids.
“Who knows? Maybe you can find a funnel-web even bigger than Hemsworth!” Emma encouraged.
Love the energy, but it’s a no from me. I’m okay with finding the average ones.
Lead Image: Getty
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