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Evening Standard
Evening Standard
Entertainment
Amy Francombe and Emma Loffhagen

A brief history of Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes’ longtime love

Another day, another example of Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes being one of Hollywood’s most adorable couples. 

The latest “couple goals” moment from the A-list sweethearts came during an interview with Gosling and Emily Blunt for the UK press tour of their new film The Fall Guy. 

As clips from the interview circulated online this week, fans noticed that the 43-year-old Barbie actor was wearing a white T-shirt with the words, “Desi, Mami, and the Never-Ending Worries,” written across it. The writing happens to be the title of a children’s book, due to hit shelves later this year, written by Mendes, his partner of more than a decade. 

The internet, obviously was obsessed. 

“Ryan Gosling was wearing a t shirt promoting Eva Mendes [sic] new book whilst on this morning… I LOVE them,” one fan gushed on X, formerly Twitter.

“Ryan Gosling doing promo wearing a shirt with the name of Eva Mendes’ book like??” another person wrote. 

After the Oscars in March, the couple hit the headlines again, after Mendes skipped the red carpet, instead spending the night backstage in a baseball cap and double denim outfit (no custom couture here, folks) supporting her husband for his night-stealing “I’m Just Ken” performance. “Always by my man,” she captioned a video of herself in case anyone was in doubt of her presence at the awards show.

Later she posted another tribute to her husband wearing a Barbie pink blazer and cowboy hat. “You took Ken all the way to the Oscars, RG. Now come home, we need to put the kids to bed,” she joked in her caption.

It’s no surprise that Gosling was joined by his family; his mother, Donna Gosling, sister, Mandi Gosling, and stepdad Valerio Attanasio, on the red carpet rather than Mendes. The pair famously haven’t walked one together since 2012.

Since debuting their relationship on the red carpet at the TIFF Awards to promote The Place Beyond The Pines, fans have been starved of official couple appearances or Instagram posts, relying instead heavily on paparazzi pictures and off the cuff comments in interviews.

Even when Gosling was nominated for an Oscar and won a Golden Globe for his role in La La Land in 2017 the two refrained from being seen together on the red carpet — showing the lengths they’ve gone to keep their relationship as private as possible. Although he did name check her in his adorable acceptance speech, stating: “I’d like to try and thank one person properly, and to say that while I was singing and dancing and playing piano and having one of the best experiences I’ve ever had on a film, my lady was raising our daughter, pregnant with our second, and trying to help her brother fight his battle with cancer. If she hadn’t taken all that on so that I could have this experience, it would surely be someone else up here other than me today. So, sweetheart, thank you.” Cue hearts melting everywhere.

Eva Mendes and Ryan Gosling haven’t been pictured together on a red carpet since 2012 (Getty Images)

Mendes first explained their reasoning for being so elusive in 2020. "As far as Ryan, I’ll only post flashbacks of things that are already ‘out there’ (like pics from movies we did or stuff like that)," she explained in an Instagram comment. “My man and kids are private. That’s important to me, so thanks for getting that.”

And in 2019, Mendes defended the decision to refrain from joint appearances and shared her shock at speculation from fans to Kelly Clarkson, “That’s literally me going, ‘I’m not in love with him. What? I’m not in love.’ ‘Cause we were trying to be very professional.”

That hasn’t stopped internet sleuths trying to piece their relationship timeline together. They first met on the set of The Place Beyond the Pines after Gosling recommended Mendes for the role in January 2011, and were spotted showcasing their off-screen chemistry while at Disneyland in September that year. One month later they seemingly confirmed their romance when they were spotted kissing at a red light.

There were no more official sightings until the two reunited on the set of Gosling’s semi autobiographical and directed 2014 film, Lost River, with Mendes sharing to Oprah Daily, “Being in the film Lost River was nothing short of a magical experience. I would love to either act opposite [Ryan] again or be directed by him at some point. I just love working with him. In a career of 20+ years, to have my two most incredible creative experiences be with him, of course, I’d want a third.”

However the third film never came, and instead Us Weekly confirmed that they had given birth to their first daughter, Esmeralda Amada, that same year. In an exclusive interview with Hello! At the time Gosling gushed about his baby mother, saying, “I know that I’m with the person I’m supposed to be with," adding that “she’s Eva Mendes" is the one thing he requires out of his ideal woman. "There’s nothing else I’m looking for." A year later they had their second daughter, Amada Lee, which they didn’t officially comment on at the time.

Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes in LA

Over the last few years they’ve revealed cute details on family life and their parenting styles. "We’re very controlling," Mendes also told to Clarkson. "I think what the term is—we’re always laughing at these terms—I think we would be ‘bulldozing parents.’”

During the pandemic they also divulged in multiple interviews how hard it has been to school two young children, while also sharing resources for other parents struggling to keep their children entertained. But good luck trying to find any photos of the two — Mendes explained in a now-deleted Instagram Story that she is waiting until they’re old enough to consent to their lives being posted on social media.

Perhaps the most mysterious element of their 11-year-long relationship is whether they secretly wed. Mendes accidentally soft-launched the idea last November during a press tour in Australia when she referred to Ryan Gosling as her “husband”. The slip came after hinting at their potential engagement when the actress posted a photo of a “de Gosling” tattoo on her wrist. “I do have a tattoo. It’s just a press on…no, it’s not a press on. But I got it years ago. I posted a picture and I’ve gotten a lot of funny questions,” she told the Kyle and Jackie O Show while skirting questions of their rumoured marriage.

Still despite their overtly hush-hush, over decade-long relationship, they’ve dabbled in some virtual PDA by way of Instagram. Most notably, Mendes shared the Barbie promo poster of Gosling dressed up in his character Ken with the caption, “So.F.Funny, So.F.Good, “So.F.Excited for you to see this… #ThatsMyKen,” which promptly birthed the now viral hashtag #ThatsMyKen.

The first image of Ryan Gosling as Ken in the upcoming Barbie movie has been released (Handout)

“She’s been very supportive. She’s supporting my Kenergy,” Gosling said on BBC’s The One Show of Mendes’ Instagram antics. “She started a hashtag, #ThatsMyKen, which meant a lot to me.”

Mendes also revealed that she asked to keep the Calvin Klein-inspired “Ken” underwear from her husband’s promotional photoshoot. “I saw the photo, and the 14-year-old in me was like, ‘Ahhhhh,’” Mendes said in a June interview with The Talk. “It’s a funny photo, and he’s trying to be funny, so it worked on all levels. But when I saw it, he sent it to me from work, and I said, ‘Can I please have that underwear? Please. I never ask for anything.’” And yes, she actually wears them, she confirmed.

Their love is, undeniably, a lesson in longevity. One that Hollywood could definitely learn from.

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