Passive-aggressiveness isn't a very desirable personality trait, but sometimes we can't help but let out a snarky remark. In fact, 82% of Americans say they have said something passive-aggressive lately. Although it's never fun to be on the receiving end of these kinds of comments, sometimes people come up with pretty funny quips.
We've scoured the Internet and collected the funniest notes, signs, text messages, and other encounters where people traded in direct communication for passive-aggressiveness. Turns out, people aren't the only ones capable of snide comments. Our apps sometimes send us passive-aggressive reminders too!
To find out more about why people resort to being passive-aggressive and how they can learn to communicate better, Bored Panda reached out to LCS-certified personal coach Karen Edwards, CPQC. She kindly agreed to tell us more about how passive-aggressiveness is linked to survival instinct and offered some effective communication techniques. Read her expert insights below!
More info: Karen Edwards Coaching | Instagram
#1 My Jerk Neighbors Decided To Be Complete Drunken Fecalwads By Rolling A Giant Sandstone Boulder In Front Of My Car, But Forgot That I Am A Tiny Geologist Who Has Access To A Very Loud Auto-Chipper At 7:30 Am
Image credits: VolcanoDoc
That same poll by Preply we mentioned previously also asked people what phrases they deem to be the most passive-aggressive. Most respondents said that hearing things like "You're too sensitive," "Why are you getting so upset?" and "No offense, but..." trigger them the most. Shifting blame on someone else and being judgmental or patronizing seems to rub people the wrong way the most.
The workplace is where most Americans experience passive aggression. 73% of the respondents in the Preply survey said so, yet, at the same time, 52% admitted being passive-aggressive themselves. The most annoying phrases coworkers and managers use are "As you are no doubt aware...," "For future reference," and "Friendly reminder."
#2 New Dog Waste Disposal Signs Went Up In New York
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#3 A Bumper Sticker I Saw In My Travels Today
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In her book Getting Along, workplace expert Amy Gallo identified eight types of 'difficult' people. Interestingly, passive-aggressive people ranked as the number one worst. "They'll appear to comply with the needs of others, but will then passively resist following through. Or they might use indirect methods to express their thoughts and feelings, so their intentions are never entirely clear," she writes.
For many, coworkers are the most passive-aggressive people they communicate with. But others also experience passive-aggressive behaviors from family members and friends. 18% of the respondents in the Preply survey said that their mothers are the people who usually talk to them in a passive-aggressive manner. For 16%, it was their friends.
#4 This Sign On The Way From Islamabad To Nathia Gali, Pakistan
Image credits: Massive-Ranger2593
#5 The Condescending Warning Label On These Snowboarding Gloves
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#6 That’s Evil But So Good
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We sought to find out why people engage in passive-aggressive behavior, so we reached out to certified personal coach Karen Edwards. She explains that for those who do it, snarky comments and indirect communication seem like the safest way to communicate.
"They may fear direct conflict and hope that subtle hints will lead to change without confrontation," she explains. "Some believe they're still 'kind' as long as they don't use harsh words, even if their tone or actions convey frustration."
#7 The WiFi Password For Our Hotel
Image credits: PackageTraditional91
#8 Passive Aggressive Food Preferences
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#9 Passive Aggressive Parking Note
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People may also resort to passive-aggressive comments when they don't know how to express their needs and emotions effectively. "Passive-aggressive behavior provides a layer of plausible deniability—they can always claim they didn't mean anything by it since they never explicitly said it," Edwards explains.
#10 Just Started At A New Shop And This Work Of Art Was Left Above My New Work Station
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#11 My Neighbor Took These Without Asking So I Took Them Back And Placed Them In My Front Yard For Free
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#12 Love The P.S
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Karen Edwards says that passive-aggressiveness is survival-driven. She describes it as a safety mechanism that feels comfortable in the moment, but "ultimately leads to self-sabotage."
"It prevents you from developing the ability to feel and express emotions in a healthy way and damages relationships by creating confusion—your words say one thing, but your energy communicates something else," the personal coach points out.
#13 Coworker Left This In The Break Room Today With His Name And Phone Number. Bold Move
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#14 Kids Are Having Fun With Friends So A Neighbor Reported To Homeowners Association That They Must Be Running A Childcare
Image credits: JustJJ92
#15 My “Going Away” Cake From My Last Day At Work At An It Company
Image credits: ultramagnes23
One way to battle your own passive-aggressive behavior is with mindfulness. As Karen points out, it reminds us that we're more than just our survival brain. "It allows you to observe your thoughts, recognize reactive patterns, and make intentional choices rather than defaulting to passive-aggressive behaviors," the personal coach says. "By practicing mindfulness, you gain the ability to respond with clarity and authenticity instead of letting fear or discomfort dictate your actions."
#16 Cassowary Warning Signs In Far North Queensland
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#17 Go Go Gadget Passive Aggressive Note. Left This Note On A Car. Don't Park In My Spot
Image credits: ryguynj
#18 This Passive Aggressive Sign At My Doctors Office
Image credits: Tom_Aydo
Passive-aggressive communication can put a serious strain on our relationships. That's why Karen has some tips on how to communicate honestly and respectfully. That way, expressing frustrations can strengthen relationships instead of causing tension.
First, she suggests using 'I' statements. "Express your feelings without blame. For example, instead of saying, 'You never clean up,' say, 'I feel frustrated when the kitchen is messy because it makes it harder for me to cook.'"
#19 My Daughter Roasted Me For Fathers Day. I Couldn't Be More Proud
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#20 If It's On The Porch, It Must Be Free
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#21 Got Insulted By Urban Dictionary While Trying To Finish My Crossword
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Have you ever heard of the 'Count to 10 before you respond' rule? It works pretty well in this case, too. Karen says that pausing and processing is important if we want to communicate with people honestly. When you're not reacting impulsively, the conversation is bound to go in a more constructive direction.
#22 I Found This On My Grampas Table And Just Lost It
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#23 Only Gold And Swedish Fish Are Acceptable In The Workplace
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#24 This Sign On The Door Of A Local Business
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When you're feeling frustrated, empathize with the other person. "Consider why they might be acting a certain way," Edwards tells Bored Panda. "Understanding their perspective can help you approach the situation with curiosity rather than frustration."
She also recommends being clear and direct. Not stating your needs and expecting the other person to "just know" is what gets passive-aggressive people in trouble in the first place. "Clear communication reduces misunderstandings," Karen says.
#25 Tired Of No One Understanding Were All Adults. Just Do Them
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#26 Great Car Sticker I Saw Today
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#27 Duolingo Just Roasted Me For No Reason
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It's also about how you say things; opt for a calm or a neutral tone. A raised tone of voice makes the other person defensive, instantly souring the conversation. Complaints also never helped anybody, so try offering some solutions. "Instead of only pointing out a problem, suggest a way forward," Karen explains. "For example, 'Can we set a schedule for chores?' instead of 'You never help around the house.'"
Another golden rule here is to pick your battles. Know the right time and place to address the issues that are bothering you, but do so when both you and the other person are in a receptive state.
#28 Finished Working My Last Shift Today
Image credits: reddit.com
#29 This Relatable Sign In Ireland
Image credits: Chantrak
#30 That’s An A-Level Of Communication With Neighbors
Image credits: RodLacroix
Being on the receiving end of a passive-aggressive text or note surely does suck. But we can't deny that sometimes, people get pretty creative with their passive-aggressive jabs. Let us know which ones from this list you liked the most, Pandas. And don't forget to check out another one of our lists where people were hilariously passive-aggressive to each other!
#31 Spotted On The Bottom Of A Box Containing Ear Wax Drops
Image credits: Kerfluffle_Pie
#32 Shouldn't Have Used Her Coffee Creamer I Guess
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#33 He Wins That Round
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#34 Myfitnesspal Is Passive Aggressive
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#35 I'm Sensing Some Passive Aggression Here
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#36 This Is Hysterical
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#37 Pos Neighbor Smokes On Balcony Outside Our Unit And Dumps His Butts On The Ground. Thought This Was An Fun Way To Address The Issue (Taped Note To His Front Door)
Image credits: vanillabinchicken
#38 Passive Aggressive Test
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#39 It's Called The Speed Limit
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#40 Found Closed To Our Airbnb In Waikiki
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#41 Love This
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#42 What’s Going On Here Then?
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#43 The People At My Workplace Are Getting Salty About Their Water Fountain Rules
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#44 The Mythical Cord
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#45 Do You Even Lift, Bro
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#46 Co Workers Keep Stealing My Work Breakfasts. Maybe This Flow Chart Will Solve The Issue
Image credits: dolo_ran6er
#47 My Neighbours Are Doing Early Morning Weekend Rennovations. Some Passive-Aggressive Feedback Left In The Lift
Image credits: IsThisAUserName86
#48 For Some Reason, Vitamin Water Is Savagely Roasting Kids With Lemonade Stands On Their Bottles
Image credits: freshprinceofbayarea
#49 Petty? Yes. Satisfying? Definitely. Handwriting? Horrible
Image credits: CommanderApparent
#50 Righteous Passive Aggressive
Image credits: Pjones2127
