Some things are better kept private, and if you’re like most people, you probably have five riveting secrets stashed away somewhere that you never told a single soul. However, they can’t be hidden forever, and it’s just a matter of time before the skeletons in the closet are discovered.
People in this online thread were discussing the said discoveries, only this time they found them among their family members, who kept them successfully concealed for quite a few years. From unknown kidnappings to lost twins, these juicy stories give telenovelas a run for their money. To uncover them, all you have to do is scroll down!
One of the leading experts on the psychology of secrets, psychologist Michael Slepian, and his colleagues have found that the most common secrets are related to (in this order) lies told to significant others, having romantic desires while single, money, and personal finances.
Evan Imber-Black, professor of marriage and family therapy, explains that “people keep secrets for all kinds of reasons, but mainly to protect relationships, themselves, or others. Secrets become harmful when a relationship is injured or when it haunts the secret holder.”
Even though hiding something is common, it often comes at a cost. Evidence from Slepian's studies suggests that concealing information results in lower life satisfaction and quality relationships and even manifests in poor psychological and physical health.
However, the effect doesn’t come from the stress or anxiety of keeping a secret, but rather from the feelings associated with shame, isolation, and inauthenticity.
“The hard part of having a secret is not that you have to hide it, but that you have to live with it, alone in your thoughts,” Slepian says. “These experiences can leave us feeling helpless, and holding a secret back in conversation is just a small slice of the pain and stress caused by secrets."
Meanwhile, people who reveal their hidden truths tend to be healthier than those who chronically keep them tucked away. More likely than not, people will react positively to being confided in. It might take a dash of courage, but disclosing secrets can make a person feel instantly better and even help form bonds and connections with others.
My dad had an affair after 40 years of marriage and my parents broke up - to be fair I understood why, my mum was very aggressive toward him and it was hard to be around even as adults. What was tough was my mum made sure everyone knew he was the ‘bad guy’ and he lost friends, etc. but, years later when I wanted to get dna tests for my mum, brother and I for fun to see our family tree my mum broke down crying and begged me not to get the tests. I asked my dad about it and he broke down crying in a restaurant (never really seen him cry before) and he told me that when I was conceived my mum had also been caught having an affair with her boss - so there was a chance I was not my dads child. He never mentioned it even when mum was going nuts about his affair. My dad is 80 now and we decided to get a paternity test so he could know before he passes and the cool news is that I am his biological daughter :-) I think I loved my dad and respected him even more after this as he raised me so lovingly I had no idea of the drama behind my existence. I realised even more what a great dad I have.20 years after his death we found out my grandfather had been quite a senior scientist on the 'Tube Alloys' project to develop a British nuclear bomb. No one in the family even knew he had any scientific qualifications. He owned and operated several successful butchers shops until his retirement. We found out when nan passed 20 years later and we found his papers.Man took the Official Secrets Act seriously!We discovered, shortly before her death, that my Nana worked with Alan Turing on the "Enigma" code-breaking during the war. She didn't have a particularly influential role in the actual code-breaking itself, she mainly worked on intercepting the Enigma codes and passing them on to Turing and his team. But yeah, she knew him and worked directly alongside him on a daily basis.
This all came about because we were going through her old paperwork etc, because she was poorly at the time and was moving into a smaller place, and we found some old ration books n'that relating to the war in some old tin boxes. She never really liked speaking about the war, and someone in the family asked her what she actually did back then.
We were all absolutely gobsmacked when she told us, even my Mum (her daughter) didn't really know what she did. It all checked out, and there's even a couple of old photos of the team (including Dilly Knox!) with Nana there alongside these people that I've had digitally restored.
Nana just didn't think it was important. She was just doing her bit for the war effort, and said she actually felt guilty that she had what she thought was a relatively "safe" job back then.
Apart from that, I've got a cousin in Australia who appeared in a few episodes of Home and Away. From my Nana's side of the fam, obviously. Ha!I am British / white and have a blood disorder predominantly found in Arabs. I took a DNA test and found out that my grandad wasnt my dad's real dad.
My grandmother ran a boarding house during the war and must have met someone, and as a result my dad was born.
There's nobody alive to share the gossip with.Found out at 48 I had a twin sister. Her daughter found me on social media. I had no idea she existed.A distant relative of mine was a pirate and was hanged for smuggling in the Carribbean.A great uncle was a police officer in Cardiff. He was married to one of a pair of identical twins. After a decade of marriage, he ran off with the other twin.Well, at least we know he had a type.Only found out recently that my biological grandfather was in a mental institution with schizophrenia. He thought he was God.My mum has a big old grandfather clock in her living room with wierd white bits inbedded in it. She didn’t tell me for years that one of my relatives unalived themselves with a 12b shotgun and that it was bits of said relative’s skull in the clock.My great aunt who lives in a tiny rural town had her little toes surgically removed to fit into a pair of shoes..?! I still have so many questions that haven’t been answered.My dad used to live in a cave. He was a part of a gang/subculture in the 1960s/early 70s called the Troggs. They used to squat in the show caves in Matlock Bath, and had quite a bad reputation stacked against them by the locals. There were crazy rumours spread about them, from "they have d**g fuelled orgies in the woods" to "they do black magic rituals in the caves" etc. In reality, they just did a lot of d***s. Whilst also living in caves.
One day as a kid I found a newspaper clipping of some article from the 90s called "Wild Thing!" or something, and there was a picture of a younger him with his Trogg mates down a cave. Then he told me everything and it blew my mind.I recently found out that my late mother sold my original Air Jordans from 1985 for $28,000 a few years ago. I kept asking her while she was alive to let me have my shoes, but she insisted that I would do something stupid like selling them. That explains the 2015 Mercedes she drove until her death.My grandad died maybe 15 years ago now. We knew he was adopted but that was about it, no idea about his birth family or any of that, trail was cold. Not long after he died the family was contacted by someone claiming to be his birth brother who had been tracking him down, we thought it was phoney but when we saw pictures of the guy the resemblance was uncanny.
He really wanted to meet his brother, he was unaware he was a week late as he had just died. Anyway we arrange to meet not only him but the entire birth family including my great grandmother who was celebrating her 90th.
Apparently she gave birth to him very young and out of wedlock so she was forced to give him up for adoption.
We knew for decades my grandad was adopted and to meet them all at once was bittersweet; great to finally find them but sucks my grandad died like literally a week before.I found some letters and a diary in my grandma's place after she passed. Apparently she used to work as maid for an important doctor (before only rich people could go to uni and become doctors) when she was 14. The man got her pregnant and then tried to convince her to abort. She refused, so he made her marry one of the family workers (my grandpa).
This was shocking since my grandparents loved each other so much and looked like a great couple, they both built a solid family and gave their children a good education.My great uncle (my nan's brother) was a getaway driver for a couple of bank jobs back in the 50s. Got caught and did time, but after release still drove around in a Jag, and bought my nan a nice new car every couple of years...My sister was born prematurely and had quite a few complications. She was in and out of hospital constantly. She needed risky surgery, emphasis on risky. Apparently it was a 20% survival rate. They went ahead with it and she later died that night. She was only 11 months old.
I was twelve years old at the time and that's what I was told and believed for the next twenty years.
What actually happened is that she had survived the surgery and was doing really well, she could have even gone home that day. However the surgeon recommended that she stay at the hospital overnight just in case. She choked on her own vomit, simply due to lack of staff and mismanagement.I was adopted as a baby. It was made clear my birth parents had had a one night stand, got pregnant, and couldnt abort because of their Catholic upbringing. They were both very poor, Irish immigrants trying to get decent work in London. I accepted this completely, they wanted a better life for me.
I contacted them at around 15, to let them know I was doing well, and what GCSEs I would be doing. They replied, and it turned out they had got back together (maybe not ever been apart) and had 2 boys together. My full biological brothers. They are living in Ireland now, and their family still is unaware of my existence.
That was a pretty rough thing to find out at 15. I have come to terms with it now at 36, with two children. They still made a sensible decision. But oof all the same.My great grandmother set her husband on fire who was the chief of police,
apparantly he was a twat to her.I was always told my grandfather was helping the sheriff of Nottingham when I was little and would visit him. Turns out he was serving life for taking a shotgun to his pregnant housekeeper, his kid of course.My Mum dated a serial killer before he was known to be one. She didn't tell me about this until a few years ago, when the man in question was being mentioned in the news again.My grandads brother had another family that nobody knew about until the funeral when they all turned up as well.My Granddad planned to rob a bank with his mates, but when they climbed up onto the roof, the police were already there waiting for them.Always thought we were descended from vikings, the family name is the same as a Viking settlement/village near us, turns out grandad, who looked Italian-black hair and olive skin-was abandoned at the settlement as a newborn by Irish travellers who were passing and was named after the village. I found this out in my fifties, which was a surprise.That my great grandfather took his own life. Shellshock from WW1 as far as anyone knows. He was a farmer so had access to guns; just walked out into a field one day and shot himself.My dad's uncle blew himself up with dynamite on his front porch like 50 years ago....does that count?
My dad tells it as a funny story...that crazy uncle.My uncle was (technically) a hitman. He got paid to kill someone back in the 80's. He was released from prison at some point in the 2000's, I forget exactly when. I got curious about it so Googled his name and what'd been done and found a nice little article about it
Dad had also gone to prison, around the same time as my uncle, for about 8 or 9 years for "iron bar and axe attacks"
Fun family.My uncle hid a body his friend ran over ….Not my family but me and a friend found out through the ancestry website that his grandfather had a second family in the Philippines where he was frequently stationed with the army back in the day.
We kept finding an entry somebody had made on their family tree that matched his details, but we just ignored it thinking it was a coincidence. Eventually we looked at it.
What gave it away Some of his kids over there even had the same names as his kids here.
If he had chosen different names we wouldn’t have noticed and he might have got away with it!My mum always told us that her mum (my grandmother) had died when she was 4 and that her brother was still born. Anyway, after my mum died, my dad just casually told us YEARS LATER that actually my grandmother had run off, taking her son with her and abandoned my mum when she was four, so I probably still have an uncle somewhere out there.My mum was kidnapped as a child.
ETA: she’s told me I’m not allowed to say anything more than that ? but it’s not a case anyone would’ve heard of before anyone gets too curious. It was definitely a WHAT THE F**K moment for me however.
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