Living without money can be extremely stressful. It’s overwhelming when you don’t know where your next paycheck is coming from and whether you’ll be able to put food on the table. However, there are moments when you have a bout of good luck that can transform your life.
User u/willow-mist sparked an interesting discussion on the r/AskReddit forum. Folks who came into large sums of cash very quickly opened up how it all changed their lives. Scroll down for their stories about the impact that winning, inheriting, and earning lots of money had on these people.
Bored Panda got in touch with the author of the viral thread, u/willow-mist, and they were kind enough to share their thoughts on wealth. You’ll find our full interview with them below.
#1
Not me, but my sister. 2017, she had no permanent residence, bouncing from couch to couch. She was working for minimum wage, just keeping herself afloat. Something happened and my nephew (son of a different sister) was taken into protective custody, and she and I took on the responsibility together. I moved them into my house, which was really small, so they had to share the living room. She worked really hard and saved to get a tiny apartment for them, struggled to furnish it and pay the bills, but she did it. Then another one of my sisters OD'd on heroin with my niece present (luckily for her, there was narcan on hand and someone smart enough to administer it), so my niece was also taken into protective custody, and my sister took her on as well. The money from CPS and state benefits helped, but they still struggled. Then in 2019, her estranged bio father took his life, and the trust fund that her bio grandfather set up was passed down to his only living relative - my sister. Literally overnight she became a VERY well off person. She owns a really nice house now, has a new car, her back yard is like a paradise for my nephew and the 2 other foster kids she took in (my niece ended up back with her mom after she completed rehab, etc.) and she never has to work again. They want for absolutely nothing. No one deserved it more than her.
Bored Panda asked the author of the thread for the advice they’d give anyone who’s feeling overwhelmed by an unexpectedly large sum of cash. “If someone has just come into a large amount of money, I would tell them to consult a financial advisor before making any major purchases,” u/willow-mist told us.
The OP urged everyone to keep their newfound wealth a secret. “Don't tell anyone. There are many people who reach out asking for money when they think someone has more than them.”
According to the author, people are more likely to ask you to share your wealth if you either inherited it or won it in a lottery. “That makes people believe that it is ok to expect a handout because the money wasn't earned by but given to the recipient,” they said.
Though u/willow-mist agrees that relationships can make us happier than money, there’s also the practical side of life to consider.
“Money can take away many of our problems,” they said, pointing out that being rich means being able to afford good housing, having the time to visit family and friends, and covering medical and dental costs.
What’s more, if you have a financial safety net, you’re not desperate. So, you don’t have to endure having a bad boss or being in a toxic work environment.
“I’ve heard it said, ‘I’d rather cry in a car than on a bike,’ and it’s true. Money can’t buy happiness, but it can help us choose our own misery.”
The author had no idea that their thread would get so popular online. They told Bored Panda that the inspiration for the question came from their personal life. “I know someone who inherited a large amount of money and wasted it all with nothing to show for it after two years.”
It’s not just stressful when you lack money. If Fortune smiles upon you and you win the lottery or inherit a sizable sum, you might not be as happy as you think. Your immediate response might be panic! Many of you might daydream about becoming millionaires. But if that actually happened, you might be sick with anxiety.
You might stress about how you’ll have to protect all of your newfound wealth. You might feel anxious about how best to spend all of your doubloons. Or you might worry about how becoming rich might impact your relationships. Because, unless you’re deftly practicing stealth wealth, how people treat you will change.
Investopedia urges people to take their sweet time deciding what to do with their wealth if they suddenly inherit a large amount of cash. There’s no rush to decide there and then what you’ll do with your millions (or even billions). Nobody can be expected to transition into a wealth-oriented mindset at the drop of a hat. Especially if they’ve been very frugal for most of their lives.
If you happen to have any debt, you should think about paying that off first. Prioritize high-interest debt. Meanwhile, consider what part of your money you’d ideally like to invest. You might be able to make enough passive income to become financially independent. Just be sure to do your research so you don’t get scammed.
Look, it’s important to celebrate your victories. If you’ve earned a huge commission thanks to your hard work, then by all means, splurge a bit. Have a nice dinner at a fancy restaurant with your loved one. Go on a brief getaway. Get yourself a cool suit or bag. In short, do what makes you happy. Reward yourself because you definitely deserve it. Money is there to be used, after all.
That being said, don’t go too wild! Think about your future. Don’t party away all of your cash. Don’t burn through everything on a few off-the-rails shopping binges. There’s always a balance to be found. You never know: you might need that extra cash just to get by in the future if the economy gets worse.
At the end of the day, true wealth lies in your relationships with people. Whether you have a swimming pool full of gold coins or you’re barely making ends meet, it’s the quality of your social life that matters the most. And that’s not just empty idealistic talk, either.
A study started by Harvard researchers back in the late 1930s found that what truly makes us happier and healthier are our positive relationships. They’re more important than money, our careers, our fitness, and even our diets. These relationships make us more resilient to the stress that life throws our way. The more socially ‘fit’ we are, the longer (and higher quality) our lives are bound to be.
But those relationships can’t be left untended. You have to be very intentional and proactive in strengthening them. It also means being more selective with whom you spend time with. Try to identify the people already in your life who energize and empower you. Who makes you laugh? Who do you feel like you can be vulnerable around? Focus on those individuals!
What’s your philosophy on money, dear Pandas? Do you focus on maximizing your profits at the expense of everything else, or do you prioritize your relationships? What advice would you give someone who unexpectedly comes into a lot of cash? Share your thoughts in the comments if you happen to have a spare moment.
My relatives and I divided the inheritance equally, each bought an apartment, no one took more, acted humanely.Stress levels before and after. It's like night and day. Being poor is stressful. Very stressful. Having money means having options that coincidentally means less worrying about making things work & more focus on actually figuring them out. Which leads to more success.
You simultaneously have more options while ending up needing plan b less. It's almost cruel. Money doesn't bring happiness, but it absolutely kills 90% of actual real life day to day stress. Which kind of paves the way for positive change.Freedom from every day financial worries
Pro Tip: do NOT tell anyone - people will make you miserable ?.We inherited a substantial amount of money recently. We knew there was an inheritance coming, but it was easily 3x what we thought it was. My day to day life didn’t change. I still work, same job, as does my husband. Everything is the same - except relief when thinking about the future, which is huge.
We took half and put it in an account for our kids - their college, grad school, etc. are completely paid for. We then took the other half and hired an advisor we know well to invest it for our retirement. The plan is to park it until we both stop working, still decades away.
We also cut big checks to our beloved niece (for school in the future) and two charities that are close to our hearts.
The thought that our future is secure is breathtakingly amazing.I'm an independent contractor, and my job requires a lot of travel, and for years I made decent money but it was never really enough to own a home or really even have my own place.
I got to a point where I signed a contract with a massive bonus and all these perks, and essentially went from making slightly more than your average middle manager to clearing a million dollars in less than a year. It was literally a life changing opportunity.
The biggest change was just being able to do all the things I held off on doing because I never had the money. I was finally able to buy a home. I bought one for my younger brother too, helped him start his own business and now he's co-owner of a logistics and shipping company. My sister is disabled and I was finally able to get her into an amazing long term care facility. Several of my best friends work with me and their lives changed in similar ways.
In 2 years time, I didn't just make my own life better, but I helped make the lives of some of the people I care about the most in this world significantly better. People that say "money doesn't buy happiness" are ridiculous.Quit my second job, paid off all of our debt, purchased a house (only debt currently) and could finally afford to start a family. Sure money can’t buy happiness, but it sure as hell can get you a lot closer to it.Everything changed. Firstly, I lost my father, that was the biggest issue, then I lost my job over attendance during settling his estate, his home being broken into by his meth head neighbors after they found out he died, then his ex-girlfriend sued us for half the estate. Then everyone I know came out of the wood work asking for money. Then when I refused to give people money for existing, they all decided that I was an a*****e and didn't want to have anything to do with me. I lost pretty much all of my acquaintances that I thought were my friends. I paid off all my bills, bought a reliable car, then bought a house to make a better life for my children and put as much away as I could. Only a handful of people continued to be a part of our lives after. I found out quickly who my real friends were.My mouth. I spent 20k at the dentist.Nothing changed for us - matriarch of the family realised nobody is really financially educated enough to handle a change from middle class to that, so she proposed everyone puts their slice of the cake into state bonds (atm the gains beat inflation by a good bit, we're not American) and that's what everybody did.
We all essentially tossed the can 5 years down the road, and are living exactly the same as before.My grandmother had an education fund made for me and put money in it every month. I was pretty young and my mom was poor and wanted to use that money to buy pot and cigarettes and other stuff. She kept bugging me and bribing me with stuff. I told my grandmother who made sure my mom couldn't access the account.I inherited 100K from my grandmother. Put it all into High yield accounts, interest payments every month got larger & I feel way less stressed about money now. I do withdraw a little every year on my birthday to "treat" myself. Other than that, I refuse to touch any of it & still live within my means. Hoping to use it for a down payment one day.For me it wasn't like a lump sum thing, but rather my husband joining the IBEW (electrical union) and overnight going from making like $20/hr to over $30/hr (and now up to about $40/hr) changed our lives. We went from barely making ends meet to having a savings account, buying a house, a brand-new car, finally getting to take proper vacations, even getting to fly on a plane for the first time and visit a whole other country! As someone who lived the first 30-some-odd years of my life in poverty, the last decade has been a huge in terms of quality of life. And not just cuz I can buy name-brand toilet paper and no longer live in a mobile home, but because my stress levels have been significantly lowered as well. I'm not worrying about bills, I have a little extra money to pursue hobbies and interests, and if something messes up in the house, like my washing machine last month, no problem. I might not be able to afford a brand-new one spur of the moment, but I can at least afford to buy a new shift actuator and pump and fix it myself.A company I was vested with sold. I made well into the seven figures. Didn't touch it for a year at the advice of a business mentor. It was probably the best advice I've ever gotten. It really stopped any potential lifestyle creep in its tracks. Now I don't have to take s**t at work, and can spend as much time with my kids as I want. .Most big lottery winners end up poor or dead in a few years. If you win, keep it secret. Move if you have to.It fell on me when I was 13, so it took six years before I had full access to it.
It allowed me to fund my own education through a Master's Degree.When I was younger my family sued my elementary school district for negligence when I repeatedly reported bullying but they ignored it, eventually culminating in sexual assault. The district settled for $200,000 ish but I was to get it in installments when I turned 18. The first installment was $13,000; it was a hell of a nice birthday present.
The biggest change was I didn't need to rush finding a job and I was able to pay for my associate's degree 100% out of pocket and take a trip to Japan before adult responsibilities started, which I always wanted to do. Also doing stuff with friends was no biggie because doing things like movies was pretty much pocket change. I did get a job a few months after graduating Highschool but I also knew if I lost it I would be OK, so I got to not stress too much about it (even though I ended up doing so anyway).
Unfortunately I also had zero experience managing money, since my family had horrible money management and no one ever taught me how to be responsible with money. I went through all of that first installment in less than a year on dumb c**p, the only thing being really valuable was paying for school and travelling.
To this day I'm still kicking myself for a decision I never made. At one point there was a house that needed some work but it was all pretty minor; things I could either learn to do on my own at worse hire someone to do pretty cheaply, like painting the house, replacing a couple of pipes, and swapping out some boards on the back porch. It had 2 bedrooms, a living room, full kitchen, and two bathrooms with showers in both. We lived in a small town and knew the property owner and he offered to sell me the house and the land for $120,000 with a meager $1,000 down payment as soon as I could get a mortgage. This was an *insane* deal and I was such an idiot for not realizing that. Could have fixed that house up and used it to work up to a bigger house.
Advice to anyone who has received or will be receiving a settlement: Put like 90% of that s**t in savings and pay for everything with your salary. Trust me. In this economy being able to afford a down payment on a house is everything.My grandma left me 70k and I invested all of it. Also didn’t tell any of my cousins and only my parents know. Hoping 70k in 20 yrs in the S&P will do retirement well that I can retire by 55. That’s the dream at least. Also didn’t spend it on anything down.Fixing things is no longer about the cheapest way to do it yourself but about weighing a good DYI solution vs just writing a check and being done with it.
E.g. a tree needs to be cut down. Without money you think about what saw you can use or borrow. Renting is a last resort but viable. With money you think that owning a chainsaw would be useful, so maybe you should buy one. Beyond that, do I really want to drop this thing myself or should I just find someone to do it for $500.
As a specific answer, I now pay someone to cut my grass.When my father in law passed, my wife (and her 3 siblings) each got $2.2M in stock/cash from his estate. Having a pretty successful business, it didn't change my/my wife's life, but it's set up our 3 daughters (and 4th child on the way) with a pretty good nest egg for them to be able to buy their first house, start a business, or take a risk that they otherwise wouldn't be able to do.
Note - the money is theirs once they turn 25.I stopped caring about keeping my job since I have a safety net from stonks. I can push back on stuff that's unreasonable now, and I'm a lot more confident when asking for raises knowing I can comfortably quit anytime.You start identifying the things that can be fixed with money, and those that cannot.I'm less reluctant to speak my mind at work. Having the "GFY" option available is very liberating.You find that lots of things you thought you wanted, you don’t want now you can have them.Motorcycle accident with truck in 2016. TBI/broke right arm/helicoptered to ICU/breathing tube and feeding tube/rehab for years to get my mind functioning again.
Lawyered up and got $300k from the trucking company. I'm making my monthly mortgage payments from that money.
It's a house but good God I would never want anyone to ever go through what I or my family who supported me the whole way went through. .My student loans disappeared overnight (paid off in 1 large lumpsum with some of the settlement check)
That's about it though, my life stayed the same other than that.I (32m with wife, and 2 kids) got a windfall inheritance (low 8 figures). The only change has been that money doesn’t stop us from doing anything now. Going out to eat, vacations, having a handy man fix things around the house, house keepers, nanny, private schools. The convenience you can buy is amazing.
Looking forward, we’re hoping to retire early and enjoy our young kids for as long as they’ll let us.I didn't cry at the thought of my car needing a new clutch or brakes or anything for that matter. i was also able to go back to school since im able to pay for the tuition in full .These comments have taught me not to worry about inheriting material things to my children. I will leave them a paid-off house and a fully funded education, and I will enjoy spending my money with my wife.You know how on online shopping or real estate listings you can list things "Highest Price to Lowest"? I thought that was hilarious and that nobody would ever use it. It turns out that it's really useful when money is no object and you prefer to not spend time looking at the lower end options.
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