At times, I feel like I can’t stop my mind from spinning. There’s always something to stress about, problems to solve or, you know, this whole cozzie lives sitch. Recently, I’ve been turning to my TV to chuck on some mindless entertainment – but I’ve found myself walking down memory lane.
While they’ve got heaps of new stuff on the platform, I’ve been gravitating towards Paramount+’s kids section. Stay with me, because there’s a bunch of movies that say they’re for kids, but really, I think they’re secretly for us: the children-at-heart, or the stressed Zillenials who desperately need to escape our current climate and rental crisis.
Suppose you want to transport back into the early ‘00s for some Spy Kids nostalgia, or check out newer (but just as hilarious) animated films like The Bad Guys. I truly cannot recommend grabbing a blanket and rotting on the couch with a movie marathon MORE. And, as a plus, if there are any kiddies around, they’ll keep quiet and enter the imaginary world with you.
The best family-friendly movies on Paramount+ that don’t require too much brainpower
Shrek 2
Shrek 2. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
Shrek 2 is ELITE. It’s a masterpiece, and TBH, it’s one of the only sequels that’s better than the first. If you haven’t rewatched any of the Shrek films recently, I’m gonna need you to march to your TV and start watching immediately. It has the whip-smart humour from the first film, the characters we love – Shrek, Fiona and Donkey – along with some new additions, like Prince Charming.
There’s a bit of commentary about the real world as well, with the land of Far Far Away acting as a faux-Hollywood. Stores called Versachery and Farbucks Coffee? Genius.
It spawned approximately a billion memes, has the best quotes, and Fairy Godmother is a *chefs kiss* villain. Her rendition of “Holding Out For A Hero” was perfect, and if you don’t like it, you’re wrong. Still not convinced? You should watch Shrek 2 for the Sexy Shrek scene alone. Bring back real cinema!
How To Train Your Dragon
How To Train Your Dragon. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
I once blurted out at a house party that How To Train Your Dragon was robbed at the Oscars, and I stand by this. It has incredible voice talent – our girl America Ferrera, along with Jay Baruchel, Gerard Butler and Kristen Wiig – and is a sweet story about a Viking teenager called Hiccup befriending a rare Night Fury dragon.
While Vikings are expected to fight dragons, the injured dragon Toothless instantly takes a liking to Hiccup. For anybody who’s ever felt like the odd one out, their unlikely friendship proves to be a bond that can’t be broken.
The animators based the black dragon on cat characteristics, so believe me when I say it’s bloody adorable. It was a massive box office smash, and has a score of 99% on Rotten Tomatoes. It’s certified fresh, baby!
The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie
The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
Speaking of cinematic masterpieces, The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie still holds up, 20 years later. It’s a buddy movie, with SpongeBob and Patrick heading off on a quest to clear Krusty Krab owner Mr. Krabs’ name. It has that classic slapstick humour we’ve grown to know and love from the series, with some hilarious obstacles that stand in the way. Also, David Hasselhoff randomly makes an appearance? What can I say, it’s art.
The Addams Family
The Addams Family. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
Before Wednesday, there was The Addams Family. This 1991 film stars Anjelica Huston as Morticia Addams, Christopher Lloyd as Fester Addams and Christina Ricci as Wednesday Addams.
It’s perfect casting, and Ricci’s comedic timing is second to none. The way she delivers the deadpan humour is fantastic, and her scenes with Pugsley are among some of the best. The jokes are dark at times, but it’s an entertaining watch.
E.T The Extra-Terrestrial
ET The Extra-Terrestrial. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
This Steven Spielberg classic has it all: that nostalgic ‘80s feel, baby Drew Barrymore, a touching story and music by John Williams. It’s still considered one of Spielberg’s best films, and is very much a family movie that kids can enjoy. It’s about a friendship between an alien, ET, and a young boy Elliott, with a focus on how the alien helps him come to terms with his parents’ divorce.
Sonic The Hedgehog
Sonic The Hedgehog. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
The Sonic The Hedgehog movies had me hooked as soon as I discovered Baby Sonic. He is so much cuter than Baby Yoda, and I’m low-key obsessed with him.
The film has a stacked cast with Ben Schwartz voicing Sonic and James Marsden befriending him along the way. Plus, Jim Carrey was born to play the role of evil villain Robotnik. The speedy blue hedgehog provides us with action, adventure, heartache and emotion, and that’s just in the first film!
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem has something for everyone, and the story is actually really solid. It’s Paramount’s reboot of the classic TMNT franchise, and some icons brought the characters to life through voice acting, like Ayo Edebiri, Maya Rudolph, John Cena, Rose Byrne, Jackie Chan, Ice Cube and Paul Rudd.
Nickelodeon bosses hand-picked Seth Rogen to write and produce, and it’s considered to be one of the best TMNT films yet. There’s going to be a series called Tales of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles released this year, before the sequel is released in 2026.
Spy Kids
Spy Kids. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
I actually squealed when I saw Robert Rodriguez’s Spy Kids available to stream. Alexa PenaVega and Daryl Sabara play siblings Carmen and Juni who have to act fast when their parents are kidnapped by an evil character, played by Alan Cumming. Of course, the only thing the pint-sized kids can do is become spies themselves.
The plot is unbelievable, but in the best way, and it’s easy to get swept up in the fantasy and adventure. There’s lots of fancy gadgets, slapstick humour and a dose of reality from the constant sibling bickering.
The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out Of Water
The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out Of Water. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
I adore The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out Of Water, because it’s absolutely bonkers. There’s 3D animation elements, live-action segments, Antonio Banderas chewing up pirate scenery and SpongeBob travelling through time.
There’s a wild sequence where SpongeBob meets Bubbles, a dolphin who’s also the guardian of the galaxy, before causing chaos. It was a box office smash, and has been largely praised by critics.
SING
SING. (Image: Paramount+ Australia)
SING is a play on all the reality TV shows floating around these days, like The Masked Singer and The X Factor, and was cooked up by the creators of Despicable Me.
It follows a struggling koala called Buster Moon, who owns a theatre that’s about to go under. He holds a singing competition which attracts an array of eclectic animals from all over the country, including teenage gorilla Johnny, voiced by Rocketman’s Taron Egerton. Other voice cast include Reese Witherspoon, Seth MacFarlane, Scarlett Johansson, Tori Kelly and Jennifer Hudson.
There’s so many other options on Paramount+, so if you’re wanting to switch off, you can’t go wrong. BRB, I’m about to go and watch Shrek 2 for the millionth time.
Feature image: Paramount+ Australia
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