The 2023-24 NHL season is almost here, but let’s have a little bit of fun, shall we?
Over the next few days, a lot will be written about the upcoming NHL season. And a lot of that will be coming from us here at For The Win! And yet, hockey is anything but a serious sport 100 percent of the time. Of course, winning the Stanley Cup is serious business, but at its heart, hockey is an incredibly goofy sport.
Much like we’ve done with the NFL as The Office clips or the top 25 college football teams as I Think You Should Leave sketches, the NHL deserves an equally goofy season lookahead don’t you think? So, to celebrate the start of the 2023-24 NHL season, here is one perfect GIF that describes all 32 teams entering this new year.
Anaheim Ducks
The Ducks were incredibly disappointing last year so there’s no way they’re just as bad this season, right? Time will tell if the Ducks have fixed their issues or if they’ll be a bottom tier team once more.
Arizona Coyotes
The Coyotes … might be okay this year? Emphasis on just okay, but the team made improvements in the offseason that have many thinking they won’t be basement dwellers. Plus, having a possible star to watch in Logan Cooley should also get the blood pumping in Arizona.
Boston Bruins
The Bruins are going to be without Patrice Bergeron for the first time in 20 years. Boston is still incredibly talented, but they’re gonna miss Bergeron something fierce this year, that’s for sure.
Buffalo Sabres
Last season, the Sabres surprised many by being a bubble playoff team with incredibly fun vibes. Expect Tage Thompson and the rest of this young Sabers team to keep the good times going, even if they don’t make the playoffs again this year.
Calgary Flames
The Flames missed out on the playoffs last season by two points, causing a cascade of changes this summer. If they play just a bit better this year, a playoff spot should be well within their grasp.
Carolina Hurricanes
The Hurricanes are once again top contenders for the Stanley Cup this season. Don Waddell and Rod Brind’Amour have run a tight ship over there in Carolina and it’s showed in their incredible consistency in recent years.
Chicago Blackhawks
Blackhawks fans to Connor Bedard all season long.
Colorado Avalanche
Sure, the Avalanche will be missing Gabriel Landeskog likely for the season once again, but Colorado has to be excited to be at near full strength after injuries really shut down their 2022-23 season.
Columbus Blue Jackets
Mike Babcock’s hiring was … suspect to say the least. The Blue Jackets parted ways with Babcock in late September, but the repercussions of his firing so late in the game will be felt in Columbus all year long.
Dallas Stars
The Stars were only two wins away from their second Stanley Cup Final berth in four years. While their efforts fell short, Dallas should be feeling good about their chances this year with the talent they’ve got on deck.
Detroit Red Wings
Steve Yzerman made a lot of moves this past summer as the Red Wings continue to retool for the future. It remains to be seen if Detroit will make the jump to the playoffs this year, but the process is still as sound as ever.
Edmonton Oilers
Connor McDavid and Leon Draisaitl once again vowing to drag the Oilers to the playoffs kicking and screaming.
Florida Panthers
The Panthers made a lot of enemies en route to their Stanley Cup Final appearance. Matthew Tkachuk in particular will likely inspire a lot of ire from folks across the NHL after his breakout season last year.
Los Angeles Kings
The Kings got their feet wet in the playoffs these last few seasons, but the 2023-24 season is when Los Angeles should take a step forward and win a playoff series.
Minnesota Wild
The Wild are a good hockey team, but they haven’t really impressed in recent years. Give us something to cheer about!
Montreal Canadiens
While the Canadiens might be bad, the team’s rebuild is moving along well enough. For now, the vibes are high, but if the team doesn’t take a step forward this year, who knows how the fans will react.
Nashville Predators
It’s surprising to see the Predators take the retooling path instead of outright rebuilding. Sure, Barry Trotz wants to make an impression as the new general manager, but I’m not so sure if retooling is the correct path here.
New Jersey Devils
Jack Hughes and the boys getting ready for another fun year in New Jersey.
New York Islanders
The Islanders have stuck with their tried and true formula of defense and goaltending leading the way for years now and the 2023-24 season looks to be much of the same. Will it work in a tough Eastern Conference? We’ll have to wait and see!
New York Rangers
Is this the year that Alexis Lafrenière and Kaapo Kakko live up to their first round pedigree? Rangers fans can only hope so.
Ottawa Senators
It feels like the Senators have been searching for answers on how to make a playoff roster for years now. This may be Ottawa’s best shot at a playoff spot as a bubble team, but it certainly won’t be an easy road to get there.
Philadelphia Flyers
The Flyers took a few good steps this past offseason with the commitment to a full rebuild. However, the pain is just beginning as the team stares down 82 games of misery and suffering. At least Gritty is there!
Pittsburgh Penguins
Kyle Dubas and Erik Karlsson are the two most important fresh faces on this Penguins team. Pittsburgh only has so many more years of contention with Sidney Crosby and crew, so the pair will have to hit the ground running once the season begins.
San Jose Sharks
The Sharks are gonna be bad this year. Sure, it’ll result in a high draft pick but boy, it’s not gonna be pretty.
Seattle Kraken
The Kraken got their first taste of playoff action as a franchise last year. As Seattle enters its third full year as a team, they’ve yet to really anger any one team or fanbase. In fact, most NHL fans love the Kraken as a young, up and coming team! Keep doing your best out there, Kraken gang.
St. Louis Blues
Jordan Binnington to any opponent that gets within three feet of his crease after he lets in his fifth goal of the game.
(Sorry Blues fans, but you know it’s true.)
Tampa Bay Lightning
The Lightning should be fine this season, but Andrei Vasilevskiy’s injury definitely hurts their early season chances in a tough Atlantic Division.
Toronto Maple Leafs
Every year the Maple Leafs enter a new season with expectations even higher than the previous one. After winning their first playoff round in 19 years then falling on their face in the second round, the Maple Leafs have a lot to prove with a new general manager and some new faces on the team.
Vancouver Canucks
A lot of things have to go right for the Canucks to make the playoffs. The Canucks are a better hockey team on paper than they were last year, but the road to the postseason isn’t assured. Still, it could happen!
Vegas Golden Knights
Vegas has a real chance to go back-to-back as Stanley Cup champions this year. The last time we saw repeat Stanley Cup champions was the Lightning not too long ago, so it’s very possible the Golden Knights have what it takes to go two-for-two by season’s end.
Washington Capitals
The Capitals have one of the oldest rosters in the NHL this season as Alex Ovechkin continues to chase down Wayne Gretzky’s record. At least Ovechkin looks good rocking gray hair at age 38.
Winnipeg Jets
The Jets are almost assuredly a playoff team given how open the Central is, but they’re just kind of …. there. And that’s not a place you want to be in today’s NHL.
