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Newslaundry
Newslaundry
National
NL Team

Awful and Awesome Ep 352: Heeramandi, Unfrosted, The Idea of You

While discussing Heeramandi :

Rajyasree: If you wear velvet and zardozi in the heat of Lahore, you won’t have a nawab around you because you will be stinking.

Abhinandan: As if the nawabs themselves were smelling of roses, they were probably piss-drunk. 

Rajyasree: Chee, chee, chee!

Abhinandan:  It’s such a stupid concept, it took me three days to watch 24-odd minutes.

This and a whole lot of awful and awesome as Rajyasree Sen and Abhinandan Sekhri discuss the series Heeramandi: The Diamond Bazaar and the films Unfrosted and The Idea of You. Abhinandan recommends Saba Dewan’s documentary, The Other Song.

This episode is outside the paywall. Watch it, enjoy it, and subscribe to Newslaundry, so you can tune in every week.

Watch it here.

Have something to say? Write to us at newslaundry.com/podcast-letters.

Timecodes

00:00 - Introductions

03:51 - Heeramandi: The Diamond Bazaar

20:09 - The Other Song - Abhinandan’s recommendation

29:44 - Announcements

31:45 - Unfrosted

38:55 - Letter

40:57 - The Idea of You

44:24 - May December - Rajyasree’s recommendation

49:18 - Kettan Singh and Met Gala 

References

Subscribe to Newslaundry

NewsAble

Heeramandi: The Diamond Bazaar

The Other Song

Unfrosted

The Idea of You

May December

Click here to download the Newslaundry app on Android. And here for iOS.

Produced and recorded by Shubang Gautam and edited by Umrav Singh.

Sting: [00:00:00] This is a News Laundry Podcast. And you're listening to Awful and Awesome.

Rajyasree: Hello, hello. This is the Awful and Awesome Entertainment Wrap, Episode 352. This is Rajesh Sheth. And this is 

Abhinandan: Abhinandan Sekhri. Back, back to back weeks. Two weeks in a row. I'm here, hosting Awful and Awesome. So those who were saying that I'm just ignoring this show, well I'm not. 

Rajyasree: And during election season.

Abhinandan: And yesterday was polling day. Then Gujarat went to polls, passed for Mati belt, etc. So it was a really long day. And today while we're recording this, our case is being heard, is going to be heard later in the day, hopefully in the High Court. So I was with the lawyers till at night and here I am in the morning recording a show.

So in case I haven't watched a few things, a few. Thodi maaf karte naa, sorry. [00:01:00] There's a song, okay, let me start off with a pop culture icon. So, uh, Mandakini. Yes, 

Rajyasree: I love Mandakini. I watch Ramdevi, Ganga Maili. Other than that, what do you 

Abhinandan: know about her? She was Dawood 

Rajyasree: Ibrahim's girlfriend for the longest time.

Abhinandan: Other than that, did you also know that she launched an album? 

Rajyasree: Yeah, I've seen the video. She made a video also. 

Abhinandan: Do you know the steps? 

Rajyasree: No. 

Abhinandan: See, you need, you need the original pop culture. So I'll sing and I'll do the steps also. Both. Two, two. So, I'm apologizing to our audience for not having watched Jack shit.

I watched what? 60 percent of episode one of Heera Mandi and even that was very tough. I'm not joking. I can only watch it in like two minute breaks. 

Rajyasree: So I just want to say that Abhinandan with great enthusiasm wrote, We will review Heera Mandi. Yeah. Which I, as I read that, I knew that he's not going to watch it.

How did you know? [00:02:00] Because I know as you bought it, I knew what would happen because I started watching it too. And I was like, if I'm having difficulty watching it. 

Abhinandan: So the steps are? 

Rajyasree: Yes. 

Abhinandan: She's wearing a blue off shoulder thing. Of course. Sorry, sorry, handsome, there is no vacancy. Sorry, sorry, handsome, 

Clip: there 

Abhinandan: is no vacancy.

It's vacancy, like you. She doesn't know, her, very, from her, worm, so. No, we can see. So sorry. Sorry, viewers. I haven't watched anything. . . 

Rajyasree: If I could be as lucky in love as Ani, I would be blessed. Abraham. Then she became a drug mule for her husband. Then she went to, then she stopped. Became your I. She's so 

Abhinandan: bad that.

See, the News Laundry Studio is like my temple. We stand for integrity, high ideals, values that are of honesty, trust, [00:03:00] credibility, and sincerity. And you sit in this temple of mine and say, I wish I was a drug mule for her, anti national drug running this thing. I wish I was as lucky as her in love. You know, I'm like.

I'm 

Rajyasree: just honest. I have. Sorry, sorry, 

Abhinandan: viewers. We have a 

Rajyasree: traitor in the ranks. So we are going to start with 

Abhinandan: Heera 

Rajyasree: Mandi. The Diamond Bazaar. 

Abhinandan: So Rajshri said you want to tell us the 

Rajyasree: story. Let me tell you the story. What I figured out, I watched four episodes, three episodes and 3. 75 episodes. I watched and I said, this is nothing's going to happen.

So let it be. 

Abhinandan: So let me just first tell everybody what is the. Yes, it is been conceptualized and directed by Sanjay Leela [00:04:00] Bansali. So, you know, it's going to be low on substance, but high on spectacle. 

Rajyasree: Music also is by him. 

Abhinandan: Uh, like that's also not unusual. Uh, it's important to point out that the cinematography is by Sudeep Chatterjee, uh, Mahesh Limaye, Hunsang, Hunsang Mohapatra, and Raghul.

The Haruman. 

Rajyasree: Okay. 

Abhinandan: Because that is the main stay of this, this spectacle. It is a cinematography, the lighting, the opulence, the, I think 80 percent of the budget has gone on that only. And, uh, I don't know to what extent it's true, but back in Bombay, when I was working on Phil Hall, he was shooting Devdas at the time.

And I remember we used to hear that, you know, there used to be various, uh, Goldie Bahalo shooting, because where our shooting used to be happening, uh, with Abhishek 

Rajyasree: Bachchan. 

Abhinandan: The four or five films were being shot together. So one used to meet the crew. We used to hear he takes one shot in a day, one shot, [00:05:00] not one scene, one shot.

And here everyone used to be rushing to like finish a scene. So, um, he takes his time. The cinematography, I think that time, uh, Pradhan, I forgot, Vinod Pradhan was his cinema, who was like, apparently used to charge some few crores. So he, so he was a cinematographer. Uh, so that is the, and it has Maneesha Karara, Sonakshi Sinha, Adhirao Haidri, Sanjeeva Sheikh, Sharmil Sehgal Mehta, Richa 

Rajyasree: Chadda.

It has 

Abhinandan: Farida Jalal, who I loved and don't just, don't just slip in Fardeen Khan. I was coming to the big guns whose career he's reviving. So since Sanjay Devdasali said that I must revive the careers of amazing talent in Bollywood that has gone unrecognized for too long. He said, Drumroll Fardeen Khan, Drumroll Adayan Suman, Drumroll Shekhar Suman.

So A, I feel bad when I see such talent like Richa [00:06:00] Jalal, um, and then I see Shekhar Suman and the rest of these jokers. But that is it. Now Rajshree, please tell us the story because I only watched about two episodes. 28, 32 odd 

Rajyasree: minutes. Yeah, so it stays, that story stays the same for four episodes basically.

So this is set in Hiramandi, which is this very well known, like, uh, GB Road, Sonagachi and all, it's this well known, well known, uh, I'm trying to say well properly, that's what I'm carrying on repeating that red light area. And 

Abhinandan: so, A, I'd like to apologize to our audience because Rajshree said Sonagachi, GB road, as if all audience are frequent these places.

So they know GB road is a red light area of Delhi, Sonagachi is a red light area of Kolkata. So I don't expect all of you to know this. She does. I don't know what kind of people she hangs out with, but as a news laundry, Viewers would not know. So I'm telling you. 

Rajyasree: And Bombay has no red light area.[00:07:00] 

Okay. I've never heard. Maybe they are very evolved as people, but, uh, this is set in pre independence Pakistan. It's set in Lahore and there was 

Abhinandan: no Pakistan pre independence. 

Rajyasree: It's set in Lahore. We knew it would become so it's become pre independent India, India. And, uh, all these money shock is Uh, Corti.

It's basically about cor cortisone, their lovers, their fights with each other. Uh, the cortisols fights with each other. They are called the wives. And, uh, and how they were also involved in the integral to the Independence movement. And, uh, the main, the wife is, uh, Manisha Ella, and she has like two daughters.

One is faced by a ri, another is. played by, uh, this chap, Sanjay Leela Bhansali's niece in fact. Oh, who's that? Who's not good at acting [00:08:00] and she should not have been given this role. 

Abhinandan: Which 

Rajyasree: one is she? Uh, Sharmin Sehgal, her name is. And she, they are the two daughters. Sonakshi Sinha is Manisha Koirala's niece.

In the, uh, show Manisha kills her sister, and the sister's child is sold off by Manisha Koala at the age of nine. And she comes back to take revenge and, uh, basically rule in Hira Mandi. So that is the story. And she, her soman is, uh, Aman or whatever his name is, Aman. 

Abhinandan: At Theen. 

Rajyasree: Aten Simon Pray is the younger Sheik and they are both as, uh, not impressive as each other.

And man and, uh, sheik. He is her, uh, patron, her Naba. And then there's another love affair with [00:09:00] this Charman, Seger and, uh, Taha. He's like looking, you watched all 

Abhinandan: the episodes? 

Rajyasree: No, four. Three and a half. 

Abhinandan: Will you finish the rest? 

Rajyasree: No, because I, I can't. It's too much. Absolutely. Uh, and I don't have a full time job right now.

That's why I was able to do this because otherwise I don't think then 

Abhinandan: you 

Rajyasree: just 

Abhinandan: watch big boss and all that. 

Rajyasree: That was my job at that point. So anyway, it is supposedly He spent 350 crore. The budget is 350 crores for this. So to me that in itself is a crime that so much money has been spent on this. 

Abhinandan: 300 or 

Rajyasree: 200?

350 I read. 

Abhinandan: Rajshi tends to exaggerate. It's 

Rajyasree: 350. If they've said 200 means it's 350. 

Abhinandan: Uh, 

Rajyasree: but there were certain things I have to say. One is the music is not impressive. Given that they are showing them dancing and singing and at least the music should be good. Two, uh, Those clothes [00:10:00] that these women are wearing in Lucknow, in Lahore, but it's actually looks like Lucknow.

Uh, if you wear velvet and zardosi like that in the heat of, Lahore or Delhi, no one is going to come close to you. You will not have a Nawab near you because you will be stinky. Poo, absolutely. Jaise ki Nawab 

Abhinandan: toh patna nahi bhi hai. Smelling of roses. Although 

Rajyasree: the Nawab 

Abhinandan: is drunk and he's pissing out of this thing.

Half of it must be coming back anyway. It is such a stupid fucking concept. I could not, I'm not joking. I'm not exaggerating. I'm not being a Rajshri Sen. I was watching it. Even these 24 odd minutes that I watched, it took me about. Two, three days to watch it. I could not watch it more than two, three minutes at a time because I'd watch it two minutes.

I'd like start my teeth. I'd start gritting my teeth. I'd start. Then I just had to shut it and like do something and try to forget about it. Then come back. I still took notes. But yeah. You took notes 

Rajyasree: still. And I have to say, Sonakshi Sinha has acted. [00:11:00] Like she's got a presence to her, which I don't think after that, the heart she was very good at.

And, uh, I did not like that film with Ranveer Singh, which everyone raved about, 

Abhinandan: which 

Rajyasree: was her I loved it. I thought it was okay. 

Abhinandan: The one where it's based on a short story of that last leaf falling. Oh, it was a lovely film. What was it called? 

Rajyasree: Lutere. Lutere. Lutera. So those are the three, these are the three which she's acted well in and she looks very nice, all that, but Manisha Koirala is Yeah, except 

Abhinandan: that she's sitting in this contrived position, this one scene.

Everyone's sitting in a very contrived, like no one is natural. It is spectacular at a level which leaves behind Devdas and that other Ramleela. Even that, you know, that was spectacle. I haven't seen Padmavat. Deepika's film 

Rajyasree: you haven't? [00:12:00] I know, I haven't seen Fighter, yeah. No, that's okay. That's really bad.

But I should 

Abhinandan: otherwise, sorry, Ika, if you watching. Yeah, I'll watch. I'll watch awa. I'll watch Fighter, let the election get over. I will take two days off and watch every film that I've forgotten to watch. 

Rajyasree: Ran Weirding has just deleted their wedding pictures from Instagram. This might be Don't 

Abhinandan: feel happy.

Don't feel happy. This is your problem. This is your problem, you know. As Mamata Kulkarni had once famously said in the 90s, when she had posed on stardust, just covering her breast with her hands, and a women's organization had filed a case against her for obscenity. She had said in an interview to NewsTrack, these women's are the bitchiest thing.

They're the biggest enemies of the women's. 

Rajyasree: So, 

Abhinandan: so anyway, so, uh, you know, It's spectacular. So it leaves all the detailing behind. Like the detailing from every little painting, every diya. It is just, that's how an ad is made. That's not how, [00:13:00] here the, the acting over the top, like I think Manisha Koirala is actually a very good actor.

She's matured really well as an actor here. It's so sad to see her do, like be angry for no reason, like people are being cruel to each other, to their siblings, for fucking no, like, in Sanjay Nath Malharra's world, everyone's a dick for no reason. Let's just be horrible. Okay. It's that is one. Second is because everything has to be symmetrical.

Also it's very spectacular, but I don't think whether it's cinematographers or they're not creative in their spectacle in the sense that it's a very symmetrical. If this is the frame, everything has to be balanced. Like there's no experimentation, like, uh, like, you know, Moulin Rouge, that's spectacular.

But the experiment, what's the Baz Baz 

Rajyasree: Luhrmann, you know, you know 

Abhinandan: what he does, what he does with the unconventional use of camera hits very conventional frame, but you've just thrown a hundred crores at it to make it look spectacular. There's [00:14:00] nothing really clever about how you found it. It's just, so he's basically, he's an art director who's been told now you direct it also.

Now, I had a friend who you know, by the way, in the nineties, when speakerphones and all weren't very common, he used to love fiddling around with gadgets. So he had, they were cordless phones with these things that you used to get from foreign land. There were no cordless. So he had hooked up his landline To these speakers on the amplifier, you know, those days used to be the tape deck, amplifier, speakers.

He connected to the amplifier and to the speakers. 

Clip: So 

Rajyasree: you could hear 

Abhinandan: actually, if you took a call, you could have surround sound, but how does the other person hear you? Because that mic was in there. So he actually did this. He says, see, I don't have to get up to answer the phone. I can talk now. He could hear.

So he was trying to show that how it's very convenient. It said, see, I can sit and talk. Hello? Yes, I [00:15:00] can hear. I was like, how is this convenient? So here, all the characters are like, when they're lying casually, they're like, We lie like this normally because everything has to be symmetrical. I sit like this, showing my mehendi and my this thing, because everything I was like, what the fuck?

It was so stupid. It was unwatchable. I would It was everything was infuriating. Okay. So the symmetry is boring. It is not at all creative. You're just throwing money at it. I mean, there's nothing clever or smart about that. Um, it's like, you know, the football analogy I'll use is on Instagram. You see a lot of these guys who juggle the ball really well.

They lie down, they get up, but they can't really play a game of football. 

Rajyasree: So, but it's still a skill, 

Abhinandan: but it's a different skill. So cinema is a different skill. Creating a spectacular is like juggling a football, but not being able to play the Incidentally, last night, PSG was knocked out by Dortmund.

Amazing. Tonight is Real vs. Bayern. What an amazing [00:16:00] Okay, so, it is like, it is like juggling well, but not being able to play a match. Then, it is tedious and infuriating. Then also you wrote down. Aap bade wo ho. Who the fuck are you? Writes dialogue like that in Brain 24 

Rajyasree: in la. They used speak 

Abhinandan: over the type acting.

Yeah. 

Rajyasree: Must eating lari food, which is what I want to eat all the time. 

Abhinandan: Hmm 

Rajyasree: hmm. 

Abhinandan: The comeback of talent like fdi ka shehar, someone is truly, truly inspiring. You know, he acts like this one episode as a climb, can't do 10. That's mys. 

Rajyasree: Okay, 

Abhinandan: so that's this 

Rajyasree: scene. I don't know whether in the first half an hour that scene is there.

This girl Sharmin Sehgal is, uh, Manisha Koirala Shoutsatra. She 

Abhinandan: loses the pearl. 

Rajyasree: She loses that pearl. So she is wearing this flowing, uh, Anarkali, uh, kurta and her hair is beautifully done and she picks up a candle which is in a, that glass, [00:17:00] uh, whatever, uh, lamp shade. And, uh, She then walks into, which is lovely, I wish I had a pool like that.

She starts walking into that pool. I thought she's going to kill herself, drown herself. So that's a little odd because your natural instinct is to come up also. But she doesn't. She submerges herself straight down. And then that light goes off and then she comes out and she was looking for a pearl. Now she's clearly slow, this woman, because if she thought that candle is going to help it.

And what was the point? Like a lot of it is nonsensical. Pointless. 

Abhinandan: Everything was pointless. The whole show is pointless. 

Rajyasree: So there's the other, you missed the independence movement part, which starts. Oh dear 

Abhinandan: God. 

Rajyasree: If you watch this. You realize why the British stayed on as long as they did. Because this is how the independent movement was being fought, these Nawabs, who, he's very [00:18:00] buff and very hot, this guy.

But they don't, they all suck their cheeks in and they have like poetry readings against the British, you know. It, none of it makes sense. Then one British guy hits him. Like very stylistically on his back. Symmetrical. 

Abhinandan: He also has to fall. He falls like that. 

Rajyasree: And then, then the British guy goes away. Bloody.

They would have shot you if you tried to kill a British soldier. It, none of it makes sense. The story is not interesting. The fights between the women are like, Kyunki saas bhi kabhi bahu thi. And that there was another one at that time. Kahani ghar ghar ki. Same quality of fighting very bad and it's very dark and dingy.

The only time I felt like, oh, so it's not because I was going, I thought, are they going to show them? This was upsetting me. This velvet outfitting. Velvetney. Velvetney. Don't say velvet out. So they change to lighter clothes during the day. 

Abhinandan: Fabric 

Rajyasree: [00:19:00] change was good. So I felt at least someone because even Sonakshi Sinha and all my stuff said, the air conditioning is not this good.

So, but should you watch this? If you have. Nothing to do. And you like Shekhar Suman and Fardeen Khan. So, 

Abhinandan: that one person watching. The one person who watches in two. Which is Adhyayan Suman. So, there are three sets. And the overlap of it. One is if you have nothing to do which is a fairly large set. And if you like Shehar Suman, which becomes a slightly smart and Aman.

Yeah. Now if you are the intersection of these three things, you're probably one person. So 

Rajyasree: you watch it, okay? You are Farin Khan. You are. 

Abhinandan: I'm talking to you . You watch I made for you. And 

Rajyasree: Farin Khan looks so like, you know, when they say you are angry, he just frowns into the camera like that. So I do think RI is very pretty.

I find her very [00:20:00] pretty at least, but that is about all that though. I can see pictures of her and think it's pretty as well. This was horrible. It's as simple as that. 

Abhinandan: So, since we have introduced you to this horrible piece of cinema, I figured I might as well suggest something. It's called The Other Song.

It's by director Saba Diwan. Uh, it is a documentary film on Rasoolanbhai. Uh, those of you who don't know, Rasoolan Bai was a very famous Bai, Indian Hindustani classical. She was a Thumri singer, par excellence. And, uh, she was from the Banaras tradition of Bais. I, I don't know whether that's a tawaiyaf, but I guess.

And there's one very Poignant moment that is related in this, where when she goes to the record, the IAIR studio, all the other BA who had come from s, you know, they had been given Padma awards and they had been, they had become singers for a IR. So all the images were there, so [00:21:00] 

Clip: fifties.

When the Hindu Muslim riot broke out in Ahmedabad, all their property was looted. They were destitute. I don't know how they reached Allahabad, but in Allahabad, there was a radio station where they would put up a small stall and sell small things. There were two or four of them. When the people there found out, they put up a small stall and sell small things.

Portrait.[00:22:00] 

Abhinandan: So she goes to see all the photographs.

I mean, it, it is a, it is a be. So the link is in the show notes below. It's on YouTube. It's a one and a half hour documentary film and this really gives you, it's not about their involvement in the freedom struggle, but this also mentions that when, uh, the bhai's of Banaras collected money to donate to Bapu's movement and Bapu, who's my hero, like, you know, Rajshri has played Did you know Rajshri is a very good painter and sketch, whatever, sketcher?

Rajyasree: No, not painter. I draw all 

Abhinandan: the time. She's very sketchy. I'm very sketchy. She's sketchy and shady. 

Rajyasree: Like [00:23:00] Shekhar Somanand. 

Abhinandan: So she had on my birthday given me a Bapu caricature. Very nice. This is the one thing that I just, just so disappoints me that he had said that I will not take money from you because you do bad, immoral things.

Your money is not worthy of the freedom movement.

Clip: You talk about your grandmother. The once powerful Chaudharyan or leader of the now beleaguered Tawaif community in Banaras. Attracted by Gandhi's inclusive call to Hindus and Muslims, men and women, to join the national movement, she had [00:24:00] organized a very unusual meeting of courtesans in 1921.

Presided by a framed photograph of Gandhi, the meeting passed a resolution to weed out obscenity in music and to promote national By singing patriotic songs at all occasions.

The irony of this meeting is not lost to you. You are aware of Gandhi's outburst against what he termed the obscene manifesto of a group of the wives in Barisal their crime. They had organized to help the poor nurse the sick and support the cause of Gandhi's Satyagraha. Gandhi declined to recognize them as Congress workers or even accept their donations.

Unless they gave up their unworthy profession, which made them worse than thieves. While thieves [00:25:00] merely stole material possessions. These women stole virtue, 

Abhinandan: which is where I think Bapu failed, but he also did so many great things. You shouldn't judge people on their worst. Like I always judge Modi ji for his ability to squeeze out a tear at opportune moments in interviews.

Now, so see, that is what you should appreciate him or not for his governance to 2002 anything else. Why should these things? So for me, Bapu's the man who gave us so much, but coming back to this, so the other song is what you should watch it. The link is in the show notes below, which is a really remarkable film.

And it has such beautiful use of tumari and it is, you'll, you'll get even the, those with really hard hearts, you will feel this bang of, of sadness for Rasoolan Bai and the people from her lineage in this film. So 

Rajyasree: I felt in this, see, he's not making a documentary, he's making a 

Abhinandan: [00:26:00] Sure. 

Rajyasree: Fiction film and you don't go, you, you shouldn't be watching Sanjay Leela Bansali if you're expecting too much realism or any realism, but the music should have at least been worth listening to because that is what the wives and all were known for.

Other. other than for their other skills, the music, the dancing, or there's nothing like it. There's nothing remarkable about it. And basic things, uh, factual problems, not factual, like normal things, like you don't read Urdu. Left to right, 

Abhinandan: there's an article in the show notes below where all the people have pointed out the inconsistencies, the mistakes, and there's so many such basic ones, uh, in this, uh, that's what in this show.

So, but the one thing I would say is that I read an article where they're saying that, you know, after Pakiza which really showed the Tawaif culture. I mean, I, I personally think if you just look at it objectively, and of course cinema is not objective, it is completely taste driven, [00:27:00] so I think Pakiza was very good for its time, and like here when they tried to make in that one dance sequence that I saw, when uski thi or whatever, they are preparing for this thing, uh, where Manisha joins the dance.

Manisha cannot dance to save her life. Okay. Oh, that 

Rajyasree: means I've blocked this out. Just think. 

Abhinandan: Just like so. And the rest are pretty good. So, of course, they make her do very basic steps, but she just doesn't have the grace of a dancer. Neither did Meena 

Clip: Kumari, 

Abhinandan: which is a wonderful film as it may be. It had an actor like Rajkumar, who's not really great at acting.

And who wasn't 

Rajyasree: the most handsome. So, 

Abhinandan: uh, and she couldn't dance, but Because it is Pakiza and you know that, you know, Meena Kumari died and the whole thing. I think that's why it's given that status, but cinematically and in the dance sequence, the music, I don't think Umrao are the same. I think Umrao Jaan is here and everything else is here.

Rekha as Umrao Jaan and Farooq Shaikh [00:28:00] and Sai Jafri for all his overacting. I think, uh, Ali, what's his name? Muzaffar Ali did a spectacular job. The music, After Umrao Jaan, it is I think impossible to bring that whole thing together. You know, the persona of, you know, Pakiza had the persona of Meena 

Clip: Kumari.

Abhinandan: It had the music, it had the lyrics, the poetry, but it didn't have the dance. It didn't have that story of Umrao Jaan. Umrao Jaan had Rekha, it had her. I mean, she's as graceful as her mother. 

Rajyasree: Just her presence on screen. So, 

Abhinandan: uh, yeah. That's, that's all I've watched actually. Now, you handle the show. I'm just going to come in with my uncle jokes.

Rajyasree: You haven't watched the other two also. 

Abhinandan: Election coverage. Whole night you're doing election coverage or you're 

Rajyasree: watching football? So you 

Abhinandan: think I'll go do that like Champions League first of May and then 8th of May. I'm not watching every night. I go home and sleep. When I'm home, I get off. Children, don't be on screens when you're home.

Even if you [00:29:00] have to do work, if it's on screen, say no. I will save my eye health and my mental health because it's the last thing if you're watching two hours of this there's this blue light that comes which stimulates your brain cells and when you go to sleep your brain is really sparking and Tell your teacher teacher in interest of mental health.

I went home and went to sleep 

Rajyasree: and you'll be 100 I've been home. 

Abhinandan: No, I went home and I went I 

Rajyasree: went correctly answer it 

Abhinandan: So I haven't watched anything else now you please handle the show. You're doing some work 

Rajyasree: Really shocking. So there is no, why don't you make an announcement? There are two announcements.

Oh yeah, I'll make the 

Abhinandan: announcements. I made , I'm giving you things, 

Rajyasree: I'm giving you things 

Abhinandan: to do. So we have a special announcement for you. The news only website and app are now accessible. Basically a set of features have been introduced. It, it overalls a website in our app and. Makes the app accessible to people with disabilities.

Uh, the features include a screen reader compatibility, voice [00:30:00] search. So you can search through voice, transcripts, color, contrast settings, dyslexia mode, and a lot more. I didn't even know that in text there's a dyslexia mode. Could people who are dyslexic have problem reading? So you set it to dyslexia mode and makes it easy to read.

I could be wrong. Maybe there's some obscure app that's done it, but I don't know of any news app in India that has all these accessibility features for people. with disabilities. So, and this was done thanks to all our subscribers who keep pushing us to do better, to do more. And I'll tell you where this idea came about three years ago when you had that live recording in Habitat.

Rajyasree: Uh, 

Abhinandan: one subscriber came to me and he tapped me and he was with another friend. Uh, he said, hi Abhinandan. And he wasn't looking at me. So I wasn't sure why he said, I'm a subscriber. I listen to your podcast, but I'm blind, but I always need someone to make this happen for me. There is technology available to make your And your stuff available to people.

And that's when Chitra Anshu said we should develop this and then [00:31:00] we collected money and we got this done. So thank you for pushing us, keep pushing us to do better and mandate 2024 new episode with Srinivasan Jain, um, to have a look at it. There's this interview with Naveen Zindal also, please have a look at that.

And all of you have made this possible through our subscribes, subscriptions, government ads, and political party donations run Legacy Media. We run on new, which is why we can do stuff that others don't even attempt. So keep your subscriptions coming in, click on the link below, subscribe to Newslaundry, pay to keep news free, so we can say what we want, unafraid, unfettered.

In public interest. Those are my that's my job here is done. 

Rajyasree: Yes. Now he'll just interrupt whatever I'm saying. So, uh, Jerry Seinfeld's directorial debut. And did you know he's 70 years old? 

Abhinandan: Wow, is he doesn't 

Rajyasree: look 70. I kept looking at him seeing has got work done, but he just doesn't look 70. He's very old.

Abhinandan: 70 is the new 50. [00:32:00] 

Rajyasree: That's true. No, but he doesn't, he give, he looks like 60 years old. Anyway, Jerry Seinfeld has made this film called Unfrosted, and I had very high hopes from this film just because it's Jerry Seinfeld, and it is about four months in 1964 when, uh, Kelloggs and General Foods had this, and then there's Quakers, quicker Oats is there, 

Abhinandan: which I eat every morning.

Rajyasree: You have Quaker oats? They make so much fun of Quaker oats. Oh, 

Abhinandan: I'm being frauded. No, no, 

Rajyasree: all of it is bad. It's processed food. How can anything which can be kept in a packet and not go bad? So I shouldn't eat 

Abhinandan: Quaker oats? 

Rajyasree: You should not eat anything processed ideally. Make your own cereal every morning.

That's not something you're going to do. So you have Quaker, which is good, but, uh, Kellogg's and general foods basically were in this war to make a cereal, a breakfast food, which is not cereal where you don't need to add milk or [00:33:00] anything, so you should be able to open a box and there's a breakfast food that you can have, which is what the pop tart is, which is like a pastry with the fruit jam inside.

Abhinandan: don't know, but just one request. Whenever you're talking, try not to block this camera. Because now I'm here only trying to look pretty because I have nothing to say. So each time you do this, and start doing like this and like this. 

Rajyasree: If you don't talk, people can't even see you. So, it is about the making of Pop Tarts.

Okay, and That's the show 

Abhinandan: about. That's what the show's about. That's what the show. You gotta be fucking, and you put this on the list. I'm glad I didn't watch it. It's a 

Rajyasree: Jerry Seinfeld film. So? 

Abhinandan: You should not be a bhakta of anyone. Just cause Jerry Sanjay, I'll watch any shit. 

Rajyasree: Yeah. So he plays William Post, who is, uh, he plays this character who sort of, he plays Bob Cabana, but it's based on William Post who made this pop tart, basically.

Best [00:34:00] part about this film is the lineup of stars he's got. So Hugh Grant. plays the tiger mascot of Kellogg's. Kellogg's has a tiger. So he plays that mascot. He's a failed Shakespeare actor who has to do this to earn money. And he leads a revolt against the company the way Capitol Hill was, uh, this thing infiltrated by all those weirdos.

Trump supporters. Yeah. So all these mascots, he gets all the mascots together and they, uh, climb the building and all. So it's. Like a spoof on the Capitol Hill Break, uh, through. Then there is, Amy Schumer is playing the head of, uh, general Foods. Marjorie Post is played by Amy Schumer. Then you have, uh, the madman guys come in as AD guys too.

Create an ad for this thing. Then Melissa McCarthy is brought in as a NASA, uh, she's a designer who's brought in to design the [00:35:00] Pop Tart, but the entire thing, like it's cute. It's one and a half hours long, but there's nothing to like, it's like he was giving money. Yeah. And for Jerry Seinfeld, like, you know, you feel, so the Hugh Grant moments are nicer standalone moments.

There are one or two jokes, which are a little cute, but that's about it, which is a little sad given that he did make a very good show. Seinfeld was an excellent show. It was. And I just, and Christian Slater is in this, so he's got a full, he's, so there, he also must 

Abhinandan: be quite old now. 

Rajyasree: Yeah, yeah. So there are some funny bits.

Basically, they are making a breakfast which will not use milk. 

Abhinandan: You've told us that. Keep quiet. You know, last time you had said that I don't know which show, they keep, like, we understand, you are keeping, keep saying the same thing. I understand, keep quiet. I have not made this point. You had said this about someone last show.

So, just so that I'm clear, this show is about Megha's [00:36:00] cereal that doesn't need milk. 

Rajyasree: Okay, now I'm giving the second point, huh? So, Christian Ceter is a milkman. After ten minutes of non stop, you're giving me a second point? No, he's the head, like, he's the don of the milkmen. So there's a milkman's union, then there's a guy who, they show all sorts of weird things which only Jerry Sanford can show.

They show that they go to GFK, as in, uh, Is it 

Abhinandan: family viewing? Because speaking of milkman, because I remember, uh, who made Maine Pyaar Ki and all those films? What was this? Barjotia. Barjotia. They used to make wholesome family films and they had this character who was the doodh wali. Remember? 

Rajyasree: Yes. 

Abhinandan: Who is it?

And who was very well endowed. Barjotia. And I was like, how the fuck is this, like, happy family entertainment. But this always happens. The doodhwali used to come, and all the, you know, driver and the P. S. It was so, how the fuck was that cinema considered? How was he considered, 

Rajyasree: like, the? So over here they have JFK.

Coming back to Jerry Sir. Yeah, JFK is played by Bill Burr. But here the, 

Abhinandan: the Don, the [00:37:00] Doodhwali is a Doodhwala. 

Rajyasree: Is a Doodhwala. So Christian Stater is there trying to stop them from doing this. Then there is Nikita Khrushchev. They show that General Foods goes to Nikita Khrushchev and says that give us all the sugar that you have.

coming from this thing. So there's a sugar lobby, which is there also. Then there is, why did he make this shit? But there is a funny bit. They go to JFK to see that because JFK says, what is wrong with you guys? You pissed off the, uh, sugar mafia and we can not have sugar in, uh, America. So he says, I'll speak to someone.

He comes up with someone he's going to speak to, but JFK repeatedly makes references to a Marilyn Monroe. singing at his birthday. So if you don't know who he's talking about, because he said ever since she sang at my birthday, you know, Jackie's so pissed off. And so he says, name one of those dessert breakfast things, Jackie, the Jackie O.

And also he has a lot of references to Marilyn and him. So it's [00:38:00] almost like an inside joke with Jerry Seinfeld has. Made into a film. It's very sad. I was very disappointed, but Hugh Grant, I have to say, there's one lesson. Hugh Grant called up Jerry Seinfeld to ask for this role. And if Hugh Grant can call up someone and ask for a job, no one should feel ashamed to.

If you want something, put your hand up and ask for it. So Jerry Seinfeld wasn't, I know what you want, you can't get. Which is that you, I should stop talking. What? 

Abhinandan: Please subscribe to Newslaundry and pay to keep news free because when the public pays, the public is served and advertisers pay, advertisers are served because news should not run on ads, whether it's government ads or corporate ads.

So that's what I ask for. 

Rajyasree: Very good boy. 

Abhinandan: Okay. This is a good 

Rajyasree: request, but I would avoid this even if you love Jerry Seinfeld. 

Abhinandan: So this brings us to the. email that we will read right now, then you can get back to [00:39:00] reviewing the last thing, whatever it is. And then we will talk about that one thing, which is this Kirtan Singh, Ketan Singh had mimicked in a show, which they do, I think Kapil Sharma show, they have mimicked Karan Johar and Karan Johar threw a shit fit and Ketan Singh apologized to him and Delhi Times carried a piece on that.

I'm like, anyway, so we'll come to that as well. But Indu says, Greetings, Miss Sen and Mr. Sekhri. Your banter brings much needed joy amidst the stifling weather, political and otherwise. Thank you. Miss Sen claiming that cycling led to Armstrong having testicular cancer got me to write this mail. Indu. Yeah.

And. As the mail will demonstrate, Indu is an educated, well read person who is probably a doctor. While there is no denying that Armstrong was a cyclist who suffered from testicular cancer, he also was on several drugs including those that could induce cancer. He had been doping prior to his cancer diagnosis.

Ahem. [00:40:00] One of the testimonials against Lance in U-S-A-D-A proceedings was his teammate, teammate's wife, Betsy Andrew, who was witness to Armstrong admitting drug usage to his doctor. Prior to his treatment, all his famous success were accomplished as a uni baller. uni ball means 

Rajyasree: one ball, my dog also one 

Abhinandan: following his testicle.

I'm just.

Following his testicle, removing surgery and treatment for cancer for your information, the book, the Secret Race by Tyler Hamilton, another Armstrong teammate, made for an interesting read cataloging how the US Postal Team and Armstrong were doping scot free for years. 

Rajyasree: So my points are not incorrect.

She's added points to my points. That's all I'm saying. So there's this film, which Abhinandan has not watched, which we will discuss means I will discuss 

Abhinandan: the idea of you, 

Rajyasree: the idea of you, which is, [00:41:00] uh, which I cried at the end. But I did cry. What can I do? What 

Abhinandan: can you do? 

Rajyasree: What can I do? You have to cry. It's based on a book.

And it's all over, uh, Like, there's a lot of promos on this film. Anne Hathaway plays a 40 year old who has a relationship, 40 year old single mother who runs an art gallery. And her daughter is, who is 18, I think, or a little younger, uh, She is a big fan of this boy band, which is like One Direction. You know, One Direction.

Abhinandan: I want it 

Rajyasree: that, you know, One Direction, Abhinandan, because. Tell me why. No. Who is, tell me why is who back? Backstreet Boys. You are old enough to give birth to One Direction. Okay. Harry Styles and all. Yeah. Yeah. So they are sort of [00:42:00] based on one direction. Her daughter, Anne Hathaway's daughter, is a fan of theirs.

She goes to, uh, Coachella, to, she has to, uh, go as the chaperon with her daughter and her friends, and she meets the. lead singer of this boy band. He is 24 years old and he's very hot, I have to say. And she gets involved with him. Ha! Ha, it's very bad. So, and then what happens and whether they have Lots to happen, they 

Abhinandan: go to hell.

Rajyasree: That's pretty much what they show. Oh. So yeah. So it is, I thought it was sweet and nice. It's not like, it's not like Bridges of Madison County kind of romance, but it is. She's, there are a lot of hot scenes in it. I just wanna tell people, but, and there's not bad,

Abhinandan: are you, are you words. [00:43:00] Well, nothing perverted about it. If, if you don't want to go all the way to like porn, you can watch this because it has a lot of hot scenes. In the 80s, if someone were to recommend a film like a scene, a scene. So Rajshri is still reviewing films for all boys schools in the 80s.

It's 2024. I 

Rajyasree: thought it was a very sweet, fun film, but I went out for lunch the other day with some people They, maybe they are a little older, they are quite old, a lot older than me, but two of them said, you watch Ideal View? We couldn't watch beyond five minutes. You didn't tell them, 

Abhinandan: you didn't tell them I watch Bigg Boss 13 episodes also?

No, I 

Rajyasree: also felt they have no love in their lives. That's why I wanted to say you should also get a 24 hour, but it is, I felt the problems that can come about having a relationship with a celebrity, having a relationship with someone so much younger, they managed [00:44:00] to, uh, touch on them quite decently. And it's not a bad, like, if you want to watch something, which doesn't stress your brain out too much, but is Not totally mindless.

I would see the thing is idea of you is not made by Jerry Seinfeld. So I did not think it would be like cutting edge satire or comedy. So it delivered what I thought it would deliver. But then I watched May, June, which is, this is on Netflix. No, this is on Prime Video and May, June is also on Prime Video, which is the Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore film where Natalie Portman plays an actress who goes to this small town.

She's going to play this woman's character. She's going to play her. So she goes to meet them. This is a woman who. had a relationship with a 13 year old and she had a child with him. May September, is it May September? I gave you the wrong name only for the film. What are you saying? 

Abhinandan: How could [00:45:00] this happen?

Surprise, surprise. You've hit a new low, diya. 

Rajyasree: May, May, December. It's not even September. It is May, December. But I have to say the film, the way they address this. So she goes, this woman ultimately married this boy who she had a relationship with. They now have three children. Uh, this is 20 years later. So that boy is now 32 years old.

She is, you know, 52 years old or 54 years old. But you, so Natalie Portman spends time, like they allow access for 10 days or 12 days like that. And a lot of people say that, why are you giving her access to your family? So Julianne Moore says, I would rather she depicts us correctly, rather than give some lurid, uh, kind of, uh, tone to our relationship, but.

[00:46:00] That whole thing of what happened to this boy and that he basically lost his childhood because from the time of 12, he was, he became a father at the age of 12, that is very well shown because there's no drama, there's nothing, it's just conversations and interactions, but how delusional this woman is, the older woman, how this boy, who is now a man who seems perfectly happy in this marriage, he has three children now, they had twins and they have the first child when he was 12 is a girl who's in college and they have twins now who are 18 years old.

But what it actually did to his life and what he has gone through, that is very well shown. I mean, 

Abhinandan: although I will say that, I mean, I guess because cinema like this, you see it, you react to it, it becomes something that you give some mind space to. And 

Rajyasree: yeah, 

Abhinandan: but It's happening all around us, but it's not a thing.[00:47:00] 

Uh, for example, you know, my parents generation, I have an aunt, she was married at 16. Uh, she had a first child, I think, before she turned 17. She was, I think she was maybe a couple of months from 15. So, I mean, had she been alive right now, she'd be maybe 18.

The age difference between her youngest child, she had four kids, and her oldest child is more than the age difference between her and her first daughter. So the age difference between her and her first daughter is 16. The age difference between her first daughter and her youngest son is 18. So I mean, they were, I think even Kasturba and Bapu were married when they were 13 

Rajyasree: or 14 or something.

So it's been happening a lot. 

Abhinandan: I mean, great grand is very long. I'm saying even people who we have known growing up have been married at 15, 16, had a child at 16, which is, and you know, yet we interacted with them. They were normal people. They had fulfilling lives. They, I guess women were able to overcome that, whatever trauma of that age or [00:48:00] whatever it is.

So I just think it's not as unusual as, you know, A film may have made it seem. 

Rajyasree: No, so that's what they keep saying. What she keeps saying, that why is it so, but of course this is a 12 year old boy and she was a 32 year old. Yeah, in 

Abhinandan: this case. But I'm just talking about that. But 

Rajyasree: I felt it was very like, cleverly and sensitively um, done.

And also these two women are such good actresses, Julianne Moore and Natalie Portman. So this is actually worth a watch. I don't know. Is it on Netflix? Maybe it's on Netflix. Just check. May, December and uh, 

Abhinandan: check. We'll tell you. That's what this was for. 

Rajyasree: Netflix. 

Abhinandan: You check. 

Rajyasree: You check, you let us know where I watched it.

Kuch toh kar lo yaar, calm. Did I watch it on 

Abhinandan: Netflix or something? Just check, check the name of the film. It's on 

Rajyasree: Prime. 

Abhinandan: Check the cast. Check what others have said. We are just here to show you our face and pop off. I 

Rajyasree: got confused [00:49:00] because Netflix acquired this. Why are you 

Abhinandan: talking over me? You're talking uninterrupted for 25 minutes.

I'm saying one sentence. You have to shout. 

Rajyasree: Such a shouter you are, man. Watch it on Prime. Yeah, he was 13 years old and she was 36. 

Abhinandan: Okay. 

Rajyasree: It's a bit of a gap. 

Abhinandan: Right. So, regarding that Ketan Singh and I don't have anything of consequence to say other than that, I don't know why Karan Johar is such a whiner.

Oh, I'm hurt. It has no good taste. Ha beda, tera dostana toh was such fine taste. And they make fun when Manoj Kumar filed a case or something cause they made fun of him. That some film. But. You make fun of them and oh my god, they're sensitive. I just find these guys such self indulgent insufferables. But that's my wit.

Rajyasree: I want to comment on this, that the Met Gala took place, which is always a little bizarre. And, uh, this time's theme was The Garden of Time, inspired by J. G. Lewis. 1962 short story. It tells, it's about the rich hiding in opulence, [00:50:00] vainly attempting to hold the relentless approach of the poor who riot outside.

And, uh, it's about this wealthy couple who, so that was the theme of this year's Met Gala. Everyone dressed absurdly as usual. But I just felt that maybe there might be some years when there are wars. And which America is actively involved in and so on. Not 

Abhinandan: actively, actually passively involved. 

Rajyasree: It funded 17 billion dollars.

It's an active 

Abhinandan: involvement. It's a passive involvement. 

Rajyasree: Whatever involvement. But I just feel maybe you don't do the Met Gala. I 

Abhinandan: disagree. 

Rajyasree: But I don't think it's entertaining anyone other than the celebrities themselves. It doesn't matter. 

Abhinandan: I don't think world events are entertaining. of great sadness or trauma should be connected to others.

There is always going to be horrors in the world. There's always going to be [00:51:00] tragedy. And at the same time, there will always be something to celebrate. It may not be to your taste or mine. It's like saying In a week where there has been a major tragedy in India, we should not do nuisance. You know, why laugh or why we, why do we do this?

There is somewhere, somewhere in India. Forget that there was a, uh, a terrorist attack last week. I think the week we're recording this where I think five or eight for those, you know, five or eight families who's, uh, you know, Brave sons died. You know, why we record. So I, I don't, I don't subscribe to that.

You know, when, when, like, when, I mean, just because we aren't, it's not mainstream news. What's happening in Sudan for the last year. What's happening in Syria. It doesn't give us the kind of Twitter outrage and Columbia students are outraging about it, but they're far worse happening in the world for the last eight years.

We've been having Oscars, Academy Awards, we've been recording stupid shows like this. Dude, life goes on. On that, there'll always be fucking things to [00:52:00] I 

Rajyasree: anyway think Met Gala should be stopped. But it's 

Abhinandan: because of this, but you should carry on partying and all and posting pictures of your bloody martinis and all.

That should happen. 

Rajyasree: I don't drink martinis. Joby, 

Abhinandan: you drink these absurd looking drinks. That is our show for the week. You can give us your feedback. Uh, Rajshri made me read YouTube comments this week. I must say some of you have given suggestions on YouTube, so maybe we'll read YouTube comments and we'll put those here.

But you can also, if you have Hindu type of very cerebral inputs, which actually we learn a thing or two, so do our audience, then you can write to us at podcasts at newslondon. com. I repeat, podcasts. com. Podcasts at newsrunner. com. We will read those emails. You will not read YouTube comments because we're not paying subscribers.

Clip: That's the thing. 

Abhinandan: So we will only entertain the views and critique and criticism and other inputs of subscribers who pay to keep news free. Uh, and I don't think I'll be able to record next week. Even you won't. You're traveling. 

Rajyasree: I will be in Calcutta. 

Abhinandan: So there'll be an awful and awesome [00:53:00] next week. Uh, but there's enough work happening on, on election.

So, uh, we'll 

Rajyasree: be back the week after with. Uh, Abish, Matthew. 

Abhinandan: Yes, hopefully I should be recording that week. Yeah, 

Rajyasree: hopefully. If I'm not 

Abhinandan: traveling out of town. 

Rajyasree: So, it's anyone's guess. You have to see. Sorry, 

Abhinandan: sorry, handsome. There is no, we can't see. Then we'd have 

Rajyasree: a music video. No, we can't start. 

Abhinandan: Okay, so this show was recorded by a wonderful sound recordist.

Anil and it has been produced by Shubhang and it has been voiced by the two of us. 

Rajyasree: Yes. 

Abhinandan: Thank you, Ms. Sin. 

Rajyasree: Thank you, Mr. Sekhri. 

Abhinandan: And it's a wrap.

Sting: Thank you for your subscription. You're changing the world by changing the way news is funded. For the smoothest News Laundry experience, download the News Laundry app. It is the best way to listen to our paywall podcasts. And you'll also get access to all free News Laundry shows. [00:54:00] Keep us ad free and subscriber funded.

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